azurite: (purple nails jewels)
So, I'm back from Vegas. Internet access there ranged from $12-15 a day (and wasn't always wireless, wtf!?), and I just didn't want to shell it out. Besides, it was actually nice just having my laptop there without the compulsion to use it.

It won't stay in Vegas )

Songs that have been stuck in my head lately:

"Thinking It Over" - Dana Glover
"Superman" - R.E.M.
"Hold Me" - Savage Garden
"I'm Scared" - Hoku

azurite: (believe in subtext)
I'm almost done with His Dark Materials, the trilogy by Philip Pullman including "The Golden Compass," "The Subtle Knife," and "The Amber Spyglass." I do think they read together better as an omnibus-- or at least 2 and 3 do, because the ending of 1 was "okay," while 2 just sort of... well, "cut off," pun not intended.

I've got a ton of other books to read at some point, many of them purchases from when I was in San Francisco, including Candace Bushnell's Lipstick Jungle, The Thirteenth Tale, the second In Death book, "Glory In Death," "The Historian," the rest of the "Book of the Dead," Susan Issac's "Long Time No See" (at Baba's recommendation), and "Girl Sleuth: Nancy Drew and the Women Who Created Her," which I'm finding is a very fun, informative read on one of my favorite childhood heroines.

Today at Borders, I also picked up a bunch of manga (another one of those 5-for-4 sales), though I'm still holding off on Fullmetal Alchemist and its associated novels, since I want to wait for the whole series to be finished. Besides, I technically don't have enough bookshelf space for what I have... it's kind of embarrassing (but cool! Because who doesn't want to have their own personal library? Mine is killer! :D). I also picked up "Codebreaker," about -what else?- codes and ciphers and their history. That purchase was, of course, inspired by seeing "National Treasure: Book of Secrets." I actually love puzzles (logic puzzles are my favorite-- I'm not much one for crosswords, though I am a little good at Sudoku), and I think that's sort of come out in WDKY's Téa, because I've had her solve her father's riddles in order to unravel a family mystery (and save Seto on the side, of course). In thinking about the future of WDKY, I'm thinking, if Téa didn't become a dancer, what would she be? There could be any number of reasons why she might not dance, and I thought she might end up as a cryptanalyst or similar. It'd be a fun way of having her one-up Kaiba in many ways-- genius of one area vs. genius of... well, Kaiba's sort of an all-around guy, but hey! :D

Speaking of fanfiction, I've started revisions on an old Sailor Moon fic of mine, "Hogosha no Kokoro," or HnK for short. Originally, the title was SUPPOSED to translate to "Guardian of the Heart," but that was back before I fully understood Japanese and the function (and positioning) of noun modifiers. So technically, it translates to "Guardian's Heart," or "Heart of [the] Guardian," but I guess that's okay, too, even though the meaning is a bit different from what I intended. In any case, I explain the mixup in my Author's Notes, and add "Guardian of the Heart," as the story's subtitle. I figure I could change it to what it was meant to be (Kokoro no Hogosha), but that doesn't have quite the same ring to it, and besides, if I were to abbreviate it the way I do for my other fics (like WDKY), it would be GotH. o_o Yeah, I have a "Goth" story. Great.

Anyway, I'm not sure why I picked this one over any of my other SM fics-- heck knows they all need revising, but HnK has great possibilities as an AR Silver Millennium Fic. No, I'm not going to try and make it fit with the current theme of [ profile] sm_monthly (which I've almost consistently had ideas for, but never gotten around to actually writing/posting).

Read more... )
azurite: (xmas ornaments tree)
I would make like Happosai and go "what a haul! what a haul!" but my haul this year was meager but meaningful-- just the way I like it. From Gary, I got some gelt (and if you don't know what that means, go look it up in a Yiddish dictionary); from Mom I got a new black iHome iPod dock/radio with alarm, along with a $25 Macy*s gift card. Rochelle also gave me a $25 gift card; Eva got me "Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End" on the 2-disc DVD edition (YAYZ!). Though I don't think it counted as a Hanukkah present, Dad also gave me V for Vendetta, and I bought myself the Anastasia (remember that lovely animated film by Fox? Wow, John Cusak ~_~) Family Fun Edition.

Yesterday, [ profile] azhp and I made my traditional Spritz cookies, so those of you in the Yay Area who want some, better call your dibs now! (This is being awfully egotistical, isn't it? But I'd like to think everyone's liked them over the years; I know I do.) Speaking of cookies, the Jays (the family that owns the flat Mom & Gary live in) gave us some delicious... well, they TASTE like cookies, but they look like brownies. And they're delicious! :D I'm eating a chocolate chip one, now.

I've still got gifts of my own to give out, but so far, it's been a nice holiday-- fun, productive, and not overly emotional. Heck, I even managed to get the Christmas tree up and decorated last night-- what a relief, considering this year, it seemed like it wouldn't happen (again), but this time due to laziness/too much furniture blocking the way/whatever, instead of Mom-is-a-Grinch. This year it only took her a day or so to get into the mood, and she hasn't been a Grinch since. Yay for that.

-Seems a lot of my cousins are going to be in Northridge when I go back on Thursday. And Scott's coming in the evening and staying the night so we can hang out Friday... o_o I'm hoping it doesn't somehow end up awkward in any way. (Knowing me, I've probably already jinxed it.)

-Dad made it to Northridge okay. Another day, another adventure. I wonder what we'll be doing for the time he stays?

-Managed to edit up an image for a Dragonfayth Xmas skin. Now I need to make something for New Year's. But the skins only display on the holidays, so anyone looking at Dragonfayth today, 12/25, tell me what you think! Sure, I can't claim credit for the Seto x Anzu art (that goes to [ profile] lin_ko), nor the skin base design itself (that goes to Kali), but I mashed it altogether and made it work! Eh-eh-heh...

-In my old room here in S.F. (which is now called the Tovstin, a mix of Tovsen -Gary's name- and Westin, where Mom works), Gary has some tiny fish... one of them died last night. :( I didn't want to let it sit there (which is what I did several years ago in high school, resulting in a mass fish death that day), so I disposed of it... so sad that it had to die on Christmas. What made it especially suck was that he had another fish that I thought had died when I first arrived... but apparently it was pregnant and just floating around, trying to avoid swimming too much. Gary poked it and it turned out to be alive, so I was relieved. I was hoping the same thing had happened with this other one, but... no such luck. I poked and it just floated back up again. ;_;

-I didn't get the chance to work on (let alone finish) my Aria's Ink 2003 Xmas competition entry "Information, Please!" (title subject to change now), but I've got it pretty fleshed out in my head... I think it was 4-5 chapters, and I think I've decided not to make it an AU... the drama's always more fun that way. If I did get it done by New Year's, it be a nice "opening fic" for Epiphany when it goes live.

-Gotta work on the [ profile] 30kisses purge!

-Wonder if I can get that purple double-breasted pea coat from H&M tomorrow...? I'll call the main store in the morning and see if they got a new shipment.

-Many, many books to read. Did I mention I'd gone on a bit of a spree at Borders the other night? Plus, I'm about halfway through the whole "His Dark Materials" trilogy; I'm several chapters into "The Subtle Knife."It's pretty comfy just lying in bed, watching movies and/or reading. I think I'll go back and do just that right now...
azurite: (ygo - kaiba smirk)
A little over an hour (and a half?) ago, my uncle Neal, Baba, Grandpa and I got back from UCLA, where we attended my cousin Erin's double-graduation. Double because she got two bachelors degrees: one in design, and another in anthropology, with a minor in urban planning. The first one was big and huge, but we cut out as soon as Erin got her name called-- the second dragged on despite it being "smaller" --they started late, and the speakers all just kept GOING AND GOING. Erin even had time to pass back a note to her mom (my aunt Joyce) that said "I thought I graduated already, so why am I getting lectured!?" when the dean just kept going and going and going...

And I still like all the excitement of graduation, even if the prospect of paying off student loans, finding a "real" job and moving out on my own (really, for the first time) is a bit daunting. I wonder if keeping my Japanese minor just to put that off for a bit longer is a good idea... I'm still undecided on whether I want to keep it as a minor.

Before the graduation, we went to my grandparents' cousin's 90th and 94th (!!) birthday celebration at this fancy restaurant in Westwood called Lawry's. It was very dark and wooden, though I think some rather rich kids (perhaps Beverly Hills ilk?) were having a party in one half of the restaurant, while various branches of the Sweet/Goldberg families filled up several tables in the other room.

Baba had chicken, Grandpa had fish, and I had this massive steak the size of my head that was so overdone (I asked for well-done, not BURNT TO A CRISP) that it was dry, and I ended up eating more creamed corn and mashed potatoes than I did steak. There was also a ton of fat on the steak, which... well, looks like white jelly, and is not appetizing to eat. So I tried to cut some of it off. I gave some steak to both Baba and Grandpa (because they asked), but even then, I got so filled up off everything else-- salad, a bread roll, and what little steak I could eat. Then I had to try and eat some dessert, but by then, we were running late to meet Erin for her graduation, which began at 4pm.

All in all, it was a very filled day-- fun, but filled. Toward the end, I was so cold and hungry, it made me irritable and a bit more complaining than I usually am (or would like to be). What's frustrating is how UCLA, quite unlike CSUN, is very wide and spread out, and not the least bit flat. It's all over hills, with major thoroughfares passing through it. They have traffic lights WITHIN the campus! CSUN just has a million stop signs. So it took a while for Neal to get the car after the second graduation (because Erin had to show him how to get to where he'd parked), and then he drove RIGHT BY US when he finally DID come and find the place. >_< We had to call to get him to turn back around and find us.

When we got home, I made myself a yummy nectarine-and-raisin bowl of Cream of Wheat and watched "Legally Blonde" with my aunt Joyce and my uncles Neal, Fred, and Dan. It was kind of fun, though says that the sequel wasn't all that great. ;_; Too bad.

Other cool stuff:
* Working on customizing more skins for Epiphany (which I *MUST* get up by the end of the summer) and Dragonfayth, including all new ones, like WritingPlus3, a new version of Safari, and maybe more!

* Fixed Epiphany's "elegance" skin using the oh-I-can't-believe-I-forgot-that CSS Box Model. Okay, so it still needs a bit of work. Can anyone on a PC with IE6 (*not 7* as I can test for that on my end) test for me? Let me know if you can check for me, please... :)

* Managed to convert (using CrossFont, a shareware program for Windows) HUNDREDS of Windows-only fonts into Mac-readable ones, which I immediately imported using the super-nifty FontExplorerX, which even detected duplicate fonts for me! Because I managed to actually USE said fonts and delete the duplicates, I saved some disk space.

* Talked to Scott (aka [ profile] fountain_the) today-- it was nice hearing from him again! Plus he sent (in an email) photos of his tiny (looks like a loft) apartment. Cooking is apparently impossible there... which I can't blame him for thinking. It took me a while to get used to the tiny fridge, itty-bitty cabinet space, and minuscule cooking area myself. I told Fred that Scott missed his old job with SDMM, and Fred smiled (in that Fred way...) and said he would tell the gang at SDMM that Scott said hi, and YES, they did get his postcard, which everyone read. :)

Not-so-cool stuff:
* I've been trying to install more games on my Windows side, since I upgraded to Parallels 3. I managed to get the Doom Collector's Edition working well (in fact, I spent most of Friday at work blasting Imps and Demons), but when it came to one of my favorite simulator games, "Pharaoh" with the Cleopatra expansion, I couldn't do it. The first attempt stalled at 37%, the second at 80%. I read a tech support tip on the Sierra forums that said to try copying the CD contents to the HD and installing from there, but it tripped up on the LAST, most important file, :( I guess I could try finding the game again (my CD is somewhat scratched up), but I'm hoping there's another way to get this ONE stupid file. No one on this FL happens to have that game, do they?

* Room is a horrid mess. Haven't had the motivation to clean it, assemble my bookcase, put my clothes away... it's funny, because I have motivation for coding, but little else. And I *NEED* to have that motivation, because there's a lot to be done (Semester at Sea app, preparing for Philly, among other things).

* I tried selling my Hot Gimmick set on eBay and there were a bunch of problems-- I thought it was because of seller fees owed to eBay, an old B&N order where PayPal saw the authorization as still pending... but in the end, I think it was because eBay saved my old Yahoo! address under the listing. After finally figuring this out, I notified the seller with step-by-step instructions on how to pay to my PROPER PayPal address, but she said it still didn't work and she wasn't interested in buying them anymore. :( I hate to think if she'll negatively feedback me, but I can understand her frustration. The problem is, I relisted the item for Second Chance, and I had no opportunity to indicate my proper email. If the runner-up wants it, they might have the same problem unless I can notify them where to send the payment! Stupid eBay... they should change email addresses EVEN ON ACTIVE OR CLOSED LISTINGS the minute a user changes it in their profile. Or I could blame PayPal, for not catching the payment even though the Yahoo! address is listed as an alternate email on my account now. Of course, the user didn't say she GOT the same error, and she wouldn't say what she did get... methinks she was just so frustrated, she didn't bother with it. Shame.

Silver lining:

* Got Dad a killer trio of Father's Day/birthday presents. Can't wait to call him tomorrow and hear his reaction. I just hope he doesn't bring up some of the drama that's plagued us earlier this week... which I suppose I'll get into in another entry, when I figure out just what to DO about it. Have to talk to Joyce.
azurite: (skip*beat kyouko)
I think I must have slept something like 14+ hours last night. I got home from work shortly after 7:15pm, and because my shoulder (and stomach) were hurting, the first thing I did was take my Darvocet and Levsin. I sat in front of the computer doing a few more backdated entries for 2002 (oh, the nostalgia) and then decided to read my latest Newsweek. About 75% through the issue, I couldn't focus anymore, so I turned off my light and decided to "take a nap." I put that in quotes because, while I had every intention of waking up again at 10:15pm to have a late dinner and maybe get some other stuff done, instead I ignored said alarm clock and went right back to sleep.

I woke up again around 1am to go to the bathroom, and it occurred to me that while I'd taken my night pills, I forgot to wash my face. :P Bad, bad idea. But I was just SO exhausted, I couldn't even imagine standing in place for five minutes to do that, so I collapsed when I went right back to bed. And now I'm up now at 7:40am. Not exactly perky-awake, and I'm still a bit sore, but at least I have my physical therapy appointment at the Klotz center later. Maybe after that (since the appointment is at 10:30am and I have no class again until 2pm), I can either head home or go to WaMu and talk to them about a bank credit card, to see what they offer.

That said, I had a weird dream that (as some dreams do) may inspire fanfiction. Let me preface this by saying I don't believe I've ever written Disney fanfic. Not for Little Mermaid, not for Beauty and the Beast, etc. But I had this weird pair of ideas revolving around the latter, and maybe someone can slap me upside the head and either tell me they're junk, they've been done before, or what the hell am I still doing in Yu-Gi-Oh, write those fics!

Tale as old as... er, last night )

Yesterday when I was helping someone at work I saw an article on Yahoo! (as in, the main Yahoo page, not search results or another page) about internships, but when I tried to find it myself, I couldn't! And trying to do a internships site: search produced plenty of results, none of which I think were the article I'd seen. Does anyone have suggestions on how to find things like that?

I also heard from Scott via email-- if he's reading this, dude, are you [ profile] fountain_the? I'm dying to know here, since the birthday matches, but there's no user info, there are no entries... I wanted to help him get started with an LJ (so he doesn't have to be clicking CC: to a million emails), but I don't want to pay for an LJ if it's NOT someone I know! So come forward, yo! Say some sort of secret phrase to confirm your identity or something. :P

All that said, I think I'll try and get back to sleep and hope the pain in my shoulder wears off... I've been careful not to wear my laptop-loaded purse on that side, but still, even an "evenly-balanced" backpack causes it to hurt. Just what I need, pinched nerves AND Sciatica. I think if I save up, I can get a monthly massage at the Student Health Center so I can avoid all this! (Maybe.)

I'm almost done with my 2002 FreeOpenDiary entries, and I'm going to poke into my old Greymatter ones soon too, so if you ever wanted to know what I wrote like back when I was an emo high schooler... *laughs* Well, it's all there. I'll do a recap entry of my favorites when I finish, but until then, happy hunting (should you be so inclined)!
azurite: (deadlines whoosh)
I'm considering going to the NSCS Convention 2007 in Philadelphia, PA. I asked my Mom a few weeks ago to check into a possible discount at the hosting hotel, which is a Starwood property, but none of her contacts have gotten back to her, so she recommended I just make the reservation for the Convention + Summit All-Inclusive (Jul. 18-21, four nights in a 4 person bedroom). At first, I was just looking at plane fares, but most are $350-$400 round-trip, and those are for flights a) on airlines I don't like or b) at ungodly hours of the morning, or c) on airlines with a 50% probability of being on time, when being on time is CRITICAL.

So I started to look at Amtrak, and I thought, it might be kind of cool to start out 3 days early and see the whole country via train. I would make it by 2:50pm on the day I need to be there, having spent the last 2 days (the first day having been partial and leaving in the evening) touring around. I might not be able to actually STAY in any of those cities, but I'm pretty sure there'd be some decent stop-overs in many places.

With a 42-hour stretch between Los Angeles and Chicago, I'd definitely need a room, but that tacks on an additional $421 to the $206 seat price, for a grand total (with my new Student Advantage discount) of around $648. Round trip would be around $1200, which is pretty much out of the question, since it doesn't even include the cost of the convention/registration, let alone food, etc. But train + plane might be viable; it'd be around $800, plus another $329 for the convention + summit all inclusive.

The catch is, I'd have to register for the convention before April 30th, and who knows how long plane or train ticket rates are any good. So I'm kind of in a quandary here, wondering what the best way to get from here to there might be. Any ideas?

I have the money to do it either way (and possibly any other methods people might know of), but I'd actually like to SAVE my money for more permanent, useful things, such as Adobe Creative Suite CS3. Or visiting Scott in Japan, assuming he ends up enjoying his time there and sticks around.

He's leaving tomorrow. He's supposed to be calling me soon. I have to say, I'm somewhat surprised with myself over it all. I'm not upset. In fact, I'm really, genuinely happy for him. I hope he enjoys it a lot (despite the cold or the humidity) and he both learns a lot and teaches many kids. I hope he stays in touch and shares his experiences with me. People keep asking "So are you guys together?" and my answer's pretty much been "Well, whenever he's here..." and I'm fine with that. I want to focus more on my school work now, anyway. I've got so much on my plate, and again, I hardly feel like I have enough time to do it all in.

Tomorrow, for example, is my busiest day. I haven't caught up with my Japanese, done my Narrative Writing assignment for Thursday, or found the font for Graphics in the evening. But I'm so exhausted from today (which went by insanely fast) that I plan on going to sleep soon and just waking up early.

I'm considering asking Baba and Grandpa to replace my shades/curtains in my room, because I hate how they hardly keep out any light, and I think that's really what they're supposed to do. If it were as simple as just needing privacy, I could cover my windows with stickers.

I've also been getting distracted by WikiFic, which I've been adding tons of articles to. I recently rolled out the Card Article Creators, so people can easily generate articles (complete with templates) about cards found in the TCG, Anime, Manga, or Video Games. I've already tested it out with Magician's Valkyria, and it's working well, though I still need to add a few more graphics for the Levels, what Counterfeit Cards look like (makes me wish I *had* bought some YGO cards in Hong Kong, just for shits and giggles), and of course, the thousands of card images out there. I need to establish an Image Policy, as well. Obviously, help in ANY area of writing for WikiFic would be much appreciated. :)

Well, Scott hasn't called yet, so I might as well get ready for bed and just talk to him in bed whenever he does call... and I hope he does call. :(
azurite: (manga venus fade)
It's actually well past sunset, but my subject line comes from Dido's song with the lyric "As the sun sets on Mary, it's rising on him/And we danced/And we laughed/And I probably got to see some things you never got the chance to see..."

I don't want to think that with the definite (though I will not say "permanent" since I don't know that) ending of my relationship with Scott means that one of us will move on completely and live an accomplished fulfilling life. The sun isn't setting on either of us just to rise on the other.

Scott has yet to send out his resumes, let alone get accepted at a school teaching somewhere in Japan and heading out any time soon. And in the meantime, we're staying friends. We're going to talk -though I can't say how often, and neither of us can guarantee the when or where. Above all else, it's important for the two of us to genuinely be honest with one another, and not think about how something might upset someone else. Sure, the me right now is thinking "If Scott ever told me he's seeing someone new, it could break me completely." But that's the me now, not the me that I hope to become-- focused on me, driven for my own needs, living my own life. That's not the me who I hope will be moved on, at least to the point where I'm not consumed by thoughts of Scott, wanting to be near him, please him, have him think this way about me, etc.

If we're meant to be together, then we'll find a way to be together again someday. If John and Jill did it, we can, too. But we're not copycats, and we're not statistics. Things will happen as they will-- come what may.

So even if I die tomorrow, I will say that I'm not sad. I'm still not sure just what I am, what I want to be, what I want to feel, or where I'm going. But I've learned a lot in my time with Scott, I've changed, and I hope other people can see that. My whole relationship with Scott's here on this LJ, from the day I met him to the day things ended-- and ended again, and again (and again. It's sad that there's really that many times we were "off and on" again, officially and unofficially, but I stopped caring for the "true" meaning or significance of those things a long time ago).

My time with Scott has been both the most trying and the most wonderful, incredible time of my life. I am truly blessed to count him among my friends, and I do hope we stay the best of friends throughout the coming years. Yes, part of me now can say "I wish that someday that friendship has the opportunity to turn into something more," but I won't hang onto that. Enough is "enough," for me. I won't expect more, or ask for more, or hope or wish for it. What I can get will be enough, and with that and just that, I can move on.

I believe in me.

Life is...

Feb. 1st, 2007 02:18 pm
azurite: (blue flower)
Sorry Gump, but Life is not like a box of chocolates, where you never know what you're going to get. With a box of chocolates, you can look on the damn underside or the insert slip to know what you're going to get. Besides, no one wants chocolates that might have poisonous nuts or something in them-- so read the ingredients! In life though, there is no list of ingredients, no handy dandy "guide of what to expect." So if anything, life is like a bag of Halloween candy-- sometimes it's sweet, sometimes it's rocky. Somtimes it gets old and stale, and every once in a while you might find something rare and amazing. As long as you don't try to do too much at once, or get upset over what you DON'T have... at least you walked away with something.

Life is like a hurricane.
Blame it on global warming.

Life is like an RPG.
There will be boring parts. There will be times when I'm walking through the forest, feeling frustrated, lost, and alone. There will be moments of random, and moments where everything feels like a battle. But I'll get my rewards --in sometime, in some form, someday.

Life is like a baking recipe.
You have to invest real time and the "proper" ingredients to get a semi-decent result. Even if you take liberties with what you put in, or don't follow someone else's guide, you know there's a certain way of doing certain things, or else you'll end up with flambé.

Life can make you feel like a puppet.
Sometimes you wonder who's pulling the strings. You don't feel in control, or maybe you know you're not, but you keep moving anyway. What makes the difference: trying to move, whether you're attempting to break free or not, or trying to be in control, even if there ARE things outside your control-- strings you can't break? Are you being manipulated or weak when you just "let things work out as they will," or is trying to influence things to your will just futilely resisting against a larger force? Is it better to be the lone rock or the wide ocean? How do you stay strong, stay true to yourself and your hopes and desires without having expectations, of yourself or of others? What is the middle ground between letting things work out as they will and doing what you want and making your own destiny?

Life is like a fanfiction.
There are plenty of characters, lots of drama, but I will always write my own ending.

What is life like? Make some more comparisons with explanations. I'm curious to see what others think.

Blather blather blather! )
azurite: (aries)
Back in the States. Have been for a few days, actually, spending all the time I could with Scott. Grandpa hasn't been feeling too well though, and that's got me worried... and I've got lots of cleaning and other random things to do. And the weather is weird. It's 64 degrees out-- balmy, considering it's supposed to be WINTER.

Okay, so I've got a few days before my United certificate expires, so I just want to buy my Spring Break trip and get it over with. But when I called Dad, he suggested I buy a one-way ticket first class, since we could drive down together (since we're both going back for Passover on April 7th). It's a great idea, but all the flights I've found going from LAX to SFO (Burbank to Oakland is out of the question; United doesn't do any non-stop flights in that direction from those airports) are $165 for first class at the lowest fare. And that's ONE WAY. When I was looking for round trips, it was only $98 or so, tax and fees inclusive. So even though I'd only pay $65 or so in the end (because of the certificate), is it really worth it to pay so much more for a ONE way trip? I've tried modifying the dates (I can do 3/30, 3/31, or 4/1), but it doesn't seem to make a difference. And the certificate HAS to be used on, so I'm kind of stuck wondering what to do. Any suggestions?

I got into SDSU! Hahah. Scott just left here about an hour ago, and I called him to tell him, but basically everything's still up in the air because he doesn't have a steady job at the moment. He's looking into a cruise ship job (photography, that is), and he still has the option of applying for a teaching position somewhere through Oxford Seminars. To be honest, I don't like EITHER of those ideas, because it would take him far away from me, but I understand the necessity of putting career/money/stability/security first. Even if he were in San Diego, that's not really the proper way to have a relationship. An ideal relationship would have the people living within an hour or less of each other, not two hours and 250+ miles. So to be picky, we're not REALLY in a relationship, but I have absolutely zero interest in anyone else or meeting anyone else (which is why it partially bothers me when Scott gets so insistent on me "getting out more" and meeting people or "making friends," because to me, it often sounds like I'm bothering him or he wants me to meet others and not think of him so much). But if something happens and he CAN get a stable job he likes in San Diego, then I can move down there and we can have our own place. That would be kinda nice...

* Clean my room
* Pay Mom back
* Pay T-Mobile bill
* Buy school textbooks (within the next 2 weeks)
* Buy new boots ($25 off at DSW!)
* Spend my Borders Rewards Credit (probably on manga.)
* Buy an external HD? I can't believe I'm saying this, but 80GB doesn't seem like a lot with all the photos and music I have...
* Work on my scholarship paper!
* Update [ profile] 30kisses things that need to be updated... (I'm downloading emails from that account again, so I should be on top of the claims list. Hopefully I'll still have the wonderful support of the other mods, too).
* Watch An Inconvenient Truth and return it to Blockbuster tomorrow (YOU MUST SEE IT. I don't usually go for things that are hype, but this is a damn good documentary, strongly supported, well-presented, and not too hard on the ears or the eyes. Watch it. Learn. DO SOMETHING.)
* Get involved in SOMETHING (club, NSCS, etc.) this semester... go out more. Not just 'cause Scott said to, but because I want to, anyway.
azurite: (tokyo map)
First, I updated WDKY on Dragonfayth to the latest chapter. I guess because some chapters were longer than others and contained those 'ye old alphanumeric character codes' I had to c&p the HTML from Dreamweaver into the story text box (with the TinyMCE checkbox turned off). I know at least some of the slow, "unresponsive" script errors were because of the world "curl" in my stories, but I wonder if the script mangling the alphanumeric codes is something fixable...

I'm also considering including my logs and things up at Dragonfayth too, making it a fully-fledged series with notes and such. If not Dragonfayth, then definitely at Epiphany. But I think the Review Replies will stay here on LJ, just to make things easier (that's subject to change...) Speaking of RRs, I still have to post them for Chapters 23-24 of WDKY, so look for those soon-ish.

I say "ish" because I DID pack two of my bags today, leaving only one left, but I still have to cram a lot of clothes (the rest until Tuesday) and some other random things in there. I'm honestly hoping that crappy United will let me get away with my carry-on (backpack), my personal item (purse) and a shopping bag with just my blanket and Toro-kun (the stuffed cat). And yes, crappy United. Would you believe that for my ONE extra bag, it's $167 USD!? Because of that wholly unexpected amount (which is about 75% of my paycheck), I had to ask Mom for money *AGAIN*. I felt rotten doing it, but she was quick and okay with it. And as it turns out, I owe her less than I thought-- I found a copy of my super-expensive T-Mobile bill (luckily I printed it out; apparently T-Mobile only keeps your last 2 bill statements online) and calculated out what she paid and what I'd paid, and what I owe her for that is less than I thought. So that plus another $400... it's still a lot of money, but I have to do it.

What's left to pack:
-toiletries (stuff I use in the bathroom, though I might decide to leave the Dove Body Soap behind, much as I love the stuff... plus lotion, anti-bacterial, meds, brush)
-some papers
-cat mug, cat plate, yellow bowl, striped glass (?), deco plate, forks, chopsticks, knife, spoon
-leftover oatmeal, cream of wheat, cocoa (make cookies with everything else)

? - Wish I could take my plastic cat trash can, but I don't know if it would fit... 'sides, it's smaller than my Purple one back in the states, so maybe I should just give it to my roommates? I'm doing that with many hangers and such. Should I even bother trying to take my lighter? I bought it for my incense, but my incense is almost gone... and short of the common kitchen downstairs, no one has a gas range here, which is the only thing I can think of using it for (since no one else is an incense queen like I am. Holly said it smelled like hippies in my room!). But I don't want everything in my bag catching on fire, either!

Scott was telling me that parents still want to feel needed and help out whenever they can, but I feel selfish for asking so much of my mom. This trip -for me, at least- was supposed to prove how I could survive being independent and on my own, even for just a little while (and still with perks-- a well-paying job and no rent, basically). It's not that I'm not going to pay my mom back in full, but I guess I shouldn't feel so guilty over it (and I do, to an extreme degree. I don't even wanna talk about it anymore).

But in the end, I can't go to the sleepover/party thing tomorrow, anyway. And I guess I don't really care, because that'll save me more money for mailing things back home, doing my hair (possibly) on Saturday at the Access Moon salon in Akatsuka, going food shopping, etc. And on Friday I'm supposed to go bowling with my tutors, so I want to save up a bit for that, too. I want to finish packing bit by bit though, as each day goes by, so I don't feel stressed the day before I leave. I still feel like I have so much stuff to pack, even though earlier today I was relieved that I'd have the money for my 3rd suitcase-- the biggest one, too. Now it feels like I'm back to not being able to decide what to keep and what to ditch, or how to pack, because it seems almost full and I still have so much to pack IMHO. But my backpack and purse still aren't so filled up yet, so maybe that'll help ease it up somewhat.

I'm still confused about where I put some of my CDs/DVDs though, if I put them anywhere... I thought I had NANA anime eps. 20-25 (that would be 2 CDs), but I couldn't find them amongst the box I intended to send (too expensive, so I crammed them into my 2nd suitcase), and they weren't in my CD case. I wonder if I deleted all those files to save HD space? I'd hate it if I did, but unless they're in the box that I've already taped up, I have no idea if I even burned them to CD. In any case, they're not on my HD anymore... though I do have the latest episode (33) and Yu-Gi-Oh! (Toei), eps 16-18. Yay for TV-Nihon getting down to the grind on that!

I should go to bed soon... we don't have class, really (well, I do for 3rd and 5th), but we do have a feedback session during 2nd period, from 10:30 to 11:30, and I have to wake up early enough to call the SF Office of JTB travel to get them to add my United Mileage Plus number to my account... and maybe then I can officially switch my seat on the plane. Kekekeke.
azurite: (pluto henshin)
Okay, so on my platter of loverliness:

(1) Get help with the new install of eFiction 3.0 over at Dragonfayth (and soon Epiphany as well; Epiphany's still running the beta version), because the categories menu has gone to hell, the featured story and random author blocks aren't showing up (even though the right variables are in place), and there's only a beta version for the featured author block until someone updates it. Le sigh.

(2) Figure out wtf is up with my funky Surpass server, because apparently it won't accept a particular PHP command that Enthusiast 3 (the fanlisting management script I'm using) throws at it. I need it to work, because the whole beauty of Enth3 is that you can have a collective website (showing what you've joined/are a member of, what you own, and who you're affiliated with), a fanlisting (or more), and the admin panel, all neatly organized. And BEA and the admin panel are working just fine, except the collective listing is supposed to call a particular page from the enth3 admin folder, but it can't seem to do it properly. And the people at Surpass basically told me "We don't support 3rd party scripts; tell us what you're missing, and we'll see if we can help." So I'm bouncing between forums trying to get all this PHP mess figured out.

(3) Do a slightly (?) backdated issue of [ profile] weekly_ygo, because no one else is doing it. Maybe if I read enough YGO fandom news, I will start writing WDKY again. :( In any case, if anyone can help me out EVEN A LITTLE, I would really appreciate it. Even if the fandom's not so active anymore, I have to catch up on all entries from November 21st 5:17pm GMT onward. So it's a little over 2 weeks due at this point, and with entries from PTDC (the most active community) *AND* all the other comms, it might be more than I can handle in one night or even "soon," just because of my workload here.

...Scott said he'd call me when I got back from EC (I told him it was an hour and a half, and it's already been over that), and I haven't heard a peep. Not an email, not an IM... *sigh* I'm already really looking forward to going home and seeing him again, but maybe I'm being too "clingy" again, even from 3000+ miles away. :P
azurite: (aries)
Testriffic IQ test

Your Language Arts Grade: 100%

Way to go! You know not to trust the MS Grammar Check and you know "no" from "know." Now, go forth and spread the good word (or at least, the proper use of apostrophes).

Are You Gooder at Grammar?
Make a Quiz

BWAHAHAH! (I would like to point out that there is an unintentional TYPO on that quiz. If you can spot it and still get the "right" answer, my salutations to you!) I would also like to say that those kind of quizzes should be mandatory before allowing people to post fics on FFnet. If they can't pass something like that with a 60% or higher, they shouldn't be posting FICS on the 'Net, because really, Brain Bleach LTD. has enough customers as it is.

Also, Comic-Con 2007, hmm... one of the biggest, most packed cons EVAR. If I end up moving to San Diego, I would totally want to go. I'd have to register before Apr. 3 to get the best price, but I could totally pull it off if I were living in S.D. with Scott. Maybe I could even drag ask him if he would like to come along (hey, it's COMICS and SCI-FI *AND* ANIME! Something for the both of us!). That would be a dorky thing. But fun!

Well, speaking of guys, just what are appropriate gifts, anyway? I need to get Scott, my grandpa, and my dad something additional. I already got my dad two somethings that are "Japan-exclusive," but I'm stumped with my grandpa and Scott. I've already done the whole tie/wallet/gift card thing in the past, so that's out. Any ideas are welcome.

And you thought the Mind Map was crazy looking! )
azurite: (anzu's problems)
You can't spell "distressed" without "stressed." And I was just as equally tempted to pick "depressed" for my mood, because I'm not HAPPY, that's for damn sure.

Yesterday I thought I'd gotten the whole SDSU application out of my way, but Scott (he did a good thing) went to SDSU and talked to a bunch of people, and they said that I might not even need to "transfer," per se, so much as "visit" SDSU, while still taking classes as if they were from/at CSUN. That means my degree would still say "CSUN" on it. Regardless though, I have to get access to and fill out the Supplementary Application re: my grades, even though my grades won't be official until several weeks into the Spring 2007 semester (at least), because I don't get back until A WEEK before that new semester starts. Plus, I would have to clear with various department chairs about whether the classes they offer at SDSU could be considered equivalent to the ones at CSUN for my major/minors, so as not having to take classes OVER again at SDSU, because SDSU doesn't "officially" consider them equivalent. They have ECON 161 and POLS 155 as pre-reqs for even ENTERING the journalism program at SDSU, but because they're lower div and I've taken so many other journalism classes at CSUN, Scott and I are hoping that I won't need to take those, and I can still get into SDSU's IMPACTED Journalism program with the classes I have.

Oh yea, and then there's the FAFSA. -_- Seriously, I'm beginning to HATE January.

I suppose my day's Tarot is kind of ironic, then... The Seven of Chalices )

My horoscope for today: You're in pursuit of excitement and fresh adventure. Try a different path to get your life going in a whole new direction. Daring sports and physical activities get your blood racing and stimulate your mind, too.

Then it makes sense that I went to the gym during 4th period. I even tried out some machines I thought I would never use, and even if I'm the only girl in the group that would be there (assuming I would ever go with the guys; since we have such different schedules, it's actually kind of unlikely; the gym also closes at 7pm), I think it would be good for me... I don't need to get into testosterone comparison contests like the boys. It's very different from an American gym, but it'll give me something to do, and I can "stay fit" and shape up... and if the endorphins really do perk me up and inspire me, all the better.

The main portion of today's concern was about the trip (to Hong Kong) that [ profile] baine and I are taking on 23 Dec. The best things in life are free... but you can keep them for the birds and bees, give me MONEY! )

But that's okay, I don't eat much, anyway! It's better to cut back on my daily Coca-Cola, and spend more time here at the dorms getting things cleaned up and done. Like my scholarship paper. *sigh* Or my paper for Pop Culture. Or my Religious Studies test. (and before I leave, a Mass Media paper, a Modern Culture paper, and a Popular Culture/Image of the Japanese in American Media paper. Oy VEY!)

If it's not one thing, it's always another.

Like my new $121 phone bill. I'm going to wait to hear from T-Mobile about what the hell's up with that THIS time, to see if the charges are legit. Even if they are, I don't have to pay until December 10th, which gives me enough time to get paid (3x) and deposit said money by wire into my bank account, and pay that way. I refuse to have mom pay for my phone bill any more than she has already. But I'm probably going to cancel my $14.99 Unlimited Text Messages (I would have to send 150 text messages a month for that to pay for itself, anyway, and I haven't even sent 85 since I've been in Japan), my Web Access (useless, anyway), and whatever other useless things I might be paying for.

Money stresses me out quite easily, and my brain deals with it by having dreams about Christian Bale doing my dishes (the night before last) or going to strange reunions/graduations where friend's boyfriends are suddenly gay and dating angry, fat white guys and where conveyer belts look like they're made of stone and have water bubbling up from the cracks.

Yeah, I think I need to sleep now, too.
azurite: (anzu eye)
Well, fuck. I went to Dragonfayth to finally post the Winter challenge I mentioned here in my LJ a while back, and I noticed there were over 1000 challenge PAGES. Not individual challenges, but CHALLENGE PAGES. Of course all but 2 were spam, and I'm stuck deleting them in batches of 30 in phpMyAdmin. This will take a while. I've since patched eFic 2.0 to not allow anonymous challenges. I will eventually add my winter challenge, and I hope anyone else who has made prompts, fanmixes, or anything else will consider joining DRFA (if they haven't already) and including their challenges.

I'm also contemplating doing a complete overhaul of the databases on my domain, because
a) no one uses the Betasquad forums, to my knowledge, and it's not worth the extra space to have it there.
b) they're disorganized as it is, with the old Epiphany eFic tables located in the same database as Dragonfayth's, WikiFic, and phpBB. But I don't know if/how I can move those sites that I still intend to keep active (i.e. WikiFic, Dragonfayth, eventually Epiphany) to their own databases. Can anyone help?

Oh, and one more thing...

I probably shouldn't be so thrilled that it didn't work out for him in Turkmenistan, and truthfully, it *WAS* unexpected (for him to say he was going back to the U.S), but for some reason, I'm happy that I'll get to see him MUCH sooner than either of us thought.


Nov. 7th, 2006 08:35 pm
azurite: (escaflowne destiny)
Ah, what a day. I woke up this morning feeling like crap, namely because of the mini-migraine that had been plaguing me since the night before. It probably wasn't a good idea to eat popcorn and sugar stars (the latter being a gift from the Tokiwa High School students when we went earlier in the evening) as I watched a 5-hour "Kimi wa Petto" marathon. (And yes, it was very good. I successfully managed to burn all 10 episodes to one DVD, too, so that makes me quite happy. I don't understand why one can't make a Video-DVD -as in, pop it into your DVD player- from *.avis, but whatever.)

I ended up skipping both Japanese and Religious Studies, the latter being a bad idea just because that class is actually TWO classes, and I think this week's class was the last part of the Religious segment, and next week, we change teachers and begin the Modern Japan segment. I just wish we'd gotten to learn more about Buddhism.

I managed to get up, eat, and shower in time for Pop Culture, where we watched part of Totoro, Nausicaa, and a documentary called "Polluted Japan." Today's class was actually quite interesting, because it pointed out some of the things that may have inspired Hayao Miyazaki's stories. Totoro was probably my first anime (I didn't even know it until recently), and I'd never even seen ANY of Nausicaa before today's class. Even better, the teacher lent out all of the shows he'd shown us thus far, so maybe later I can watch the rest of the apocalyptic movie "Dragonhead."

I'm hoping both my teachers will be understanding about my missing class earlier. Winter is the season for people getting sick, and I certainly wasn't feeling WELL today. Thankfully Wednesday's not a class-heavy day; I have EC with Christine and by myself (but we're going to watch a movie in the EC with Christine), and my kanji packet due; I think that's about it.

I really want to get my butt to work on my project-- that is, the "book" talking about the Women Writers of Japan. I can either do a whole lot of focus on one aspect (writers vs. manga-ka, men vs. women, now vs. historical times, Japan vs. USA) or focus a bit on all of them. Above all else, I want it to read "easily," and not like some boring book. So I'm going to revise my proposal outline, get a "hypothesis" or "thesis" statement working, and maybe spend some time tomorrow at the International Center library, looking for resources. I guess this need to get that done coincides with my boredom... my want to read some BOOKS. Not fanfics (sorry), but BOOKS. I was thinking of buying some things off or, so if you have any suggestions for fiction, non-fiction, whatever-- let me know. This is especially true if you think of any books that can help me with my research. I already know about some of Gilles Poitras' and Susan Napier's, though.

Finally, Scott emailed me tonight! Actually, I was looking at a Borders email when HIS email came, and I realized he must be online. Since I had Adium already turned on, I opened up my buddy list to see if he was there-- and he was! So despite Turkmenistan having bad connections and such, we were still able to IM each other for a few minutes, which made me feel very happy. It's true that I can't see him, hear his voice, or hold him, but... I know I will someday soon. :) I have to stay positive in that respect, and keep on learning and growing on my own. He said he sent me an *EIGHT* PAGE letter, so I'm really looking forward to that. In fact, I think I'll go check my mailbox now... just in case.
azurite: (potc - will nice hat)
Today was Halloween in Japan, and while it's not nearly as big a holiday as it is in the USA, it was still rather fun. Earlier this week when I went to Keisei with Holly, we spotted a group of kids and their parents (presumably) all dressed up and talking with a talk show host about a local Halloween event. The "everything store," Loft, was even having a televised fashion show with all sorts of costumes, and plenty more for sale. I was tempted to buy a lavender cheongsam, but I think the bust was a bit too big for me...

For the past week, I talked about Halloween with my EC groups. For last Wednesday's group, I made pumpkin pie with the help of Christine, Erica, Jaclyn, and Todd. This week Christine helped planned a haphazard, sort of last-minute Halloween party upstairs in the dorm's Party Room, but it ended up panning out in the end-- she got decorations, everyone made something or brought something (candy, drinks, chips, okonomiyaki), and people played games (Twister, Pictionary), and we had music thanks to both my laptop and Kevin's. Christine, Erica, and I all missed our pop culture class (*wail* I missed Animation Runner Kuromi!) in order to get everything done, but since it all ended up so well, I guess I don't mind so much.

Since it was last minute, I didn't have a formal costume, but I did add two paper horns to my red lace headband. With my red tops (vinyl tube for inside, long-sleeved shirt with turtleneck sweater for outside) and leather pants, I was a "she-devil" with bright red lips. Alas, I forgot to have anyone take pictures of me with my own camera, but I know plenty of people DID take pictures of me because of the skanky top I was wearing. Kimchi even took pictures of me while I was playing Twister, but she didn't focus on my face-- she focused on my boobs! :P

The costumes were as follows:
Holly - Lolita, Christine - School girl, Daisuke - Doraemon in a kimono, Daniel - Skeleton, Jaclyn - School girl, Erica - Cat, Todd - Hard Gay (who else?), Kevin - "Spiderman" (he wore a shirt with a spider on it.), John - (Sick) School boy, Yuta - Anakin Skywalker, Ryou - Spiderman/Superman, Wan - The Count of Monte Cristo? (cowboy cat with long blond hair??), Some Guy - Guy with a Gold Mask, Yoshimi - Traditional Japanese Girl (purple kimono)... and a bunch of others that I've forgotten.

A few of the guys put on a really good show for us with fake guns and light sabers- Ryou can somersault and grab a gun, but when he went head-to-head with Todd, "Hard Gay" won! There was also a pretty fun expo of the guys having a light saber battle, complete with jumping, Yoda-spinning, bullet-time and other fun things.

We ended up not going to karaoke, which is probably for the better, since the party ended at 10 p.m., we had to clean up, and I think most of us are tired, or will be soon. I was just glad to get all my makeup off, since I've pretty much been working and on my feet the whole day, even during my breaks. At least tomorrow I get to sleep in a little, because we have a special event in Japanese class that involves not showing up until 10:30.

What rounded off this day and made it good rather than humiliating or miserable (as some of my Halloweens have sadly turned out) was the fact that I saw what I have now named The Six Cat Brigade. On our way back from 7-11 (to get condensed milk tubes), Erica and I spotted SIX cats.

The first cat was a skinny and somewhat grumpy white and brown cat with spots-- I called him Spot. We saw him on the way to 7-11 too, but on the way back the dorms, he was much more vocal, and he even swatted at me. :P The second cat was actually a kitten, though it looked like he'd been in a few fights. It was little and white with a brown tail that was stuck straight up-- because the other half was missing! Then I spotted 2 more cats in someone's garage area-- but it ended up being 4. They looked like they could have been Spot's mom and dad, so that's what I called them. They both just stared and blinked. That's it. In the background, I also spotted what may have been Pumpkin, aka Catzilla the Ginormous Orange Cat. But he just sat there and blinked, too. Finally another white and brown-tailed cat (maybe Kitten's older brother?) came slinking up-- but he had even less of a tail! It was very small and curled up against his bum, so maybe he was a different breed-- the kind that's born without much of a tail. So I called him Piglet. :P

I'm so happy I got to see and pet some Japanese cats today! They may have thought "Ugh, foreigner with no fish!" but I was happy just to see them with my own eyes-- real neighborhood cats, not pet-store cats in cages!

I have to write postcards to everyone (co-workers, friends, family) and a letter to Scott soon; if letters really take 3 weeks to get to Turkmenistan and I want it to get there before his birthday, I have to write it and send it soon. I wanted to send him more pictures at the very least, so I'll have to ask around tomorrow to see if someone can give me copies, either via email, CD, USB, or something else. Other people are the only ones with pictures of me, and it would be silly to send Scott just pictures of everyone else! I would take some myself, but I'm already clean-faced and in my pajamas, and there's absolutely nothing pretty about that. :P
azurite: (chuck norris ships d/hr)
Scott text messaged me FROM TURKMENISTAN a while ago. I was so thrilled so I tried to respond to him immediately. Whether on Vodafone or DoCoMo, my short message in the Outbox refused to go through. I thought, maybe it's because I'm on a US phone (U.S. number/SIM card), using a Japanese carrier, sending to a foreign country?

So I tried to reformat the number, which had arrived as +993 (Turkmenistan's country code), the area code (6), and the number. I decided to add USA's "out" IDD prefix, 011. That allowed the message to be sent, but I don't know if it actually went to the right cell phone (Scott's host father's cell). Doesn't the cell phone concept of the + sign eliminate the need of entering an "out" number, regardless of where you are? In other words, the IDD is not necessary, right? Part of the number may have been both an area code and a city code; I'm not sure how it's formatted.

But I am confused. I don't see why +933-6-the number wouldn't have sent... but maybe SMS have different rules? Can anyone help me out?

Edit: If you are in the U.S. or another country (besides Japan), please text message me (the link should be on my LJ User Info, available for all those on my FL to see). I want to see how your number appears in my Call History, and then see if I can text back. Then you can text me again to let me know that you got my reply.

Note of absolutely no importance to anyone (I would think): So in getting ready to make pumpkin mini-pies for my shared EC group with Christine tomorrow, I bought a cupcake tray and liners to make mini-pies in. Stupid me forgot that we'd be using a multi-function microwave, which has a very limited size capacity. So of course I spent 940 yen on a tray and liners which I can't use, BECAUSE THE TRAY DOESN'T FIT! I just got back from a quick run to Kasumi to get a new 22cm normal pie tray. It's sad that I was getting hyped up about the mini-pies, but there's no other choice. I doubt people have a bigger microwave that doubles as an oven here in the dorms, and I'm pretty sure the communal kitchen doesn't have an oven-- just gas ranges.

So I'm thinking my first eBay auction from Japan will be a never-used cupcake tray with free "Color Cup" liners in delicious pastel colors! What do you think?
azurite: (tokyo map)
After another long weekend (and another typhoon), both my face and my sanity are slightly less worse for the wear. However, I should be getting my own personal wireless Internet access in my room by the end of the week, so thank goodness for that. I can only hope that all the firewalls I keep running into are Tokiwa University firewalls, and not Japanese government firewalls (though I doubt it).

I somehow mangled my FFX-2 ILM game file (beyond getting the Enterprise accessory, which I already knew would prevent me from getting a Perfect Game) by getting all the way to Chapter 3 in a matter of hours, and I just recently passed the Sphere Break tournament in Luca. I tried to use my Ultimate Guide to Sphere Break to help me beat Shinra, but it was running incredibly slow on my Windows VM, and I don't know why. I wanted to see if there was a Mac version available, but the original page that the FAQ came from is firewalled, and the Colorado University page where J Covey (or whatever his online alias was) hosted the files (DOS-based scripts) appears to be gone. If anyone can point me in the right direction -for either a Mac-based version of a similar script or a way to fix the slowness of DOS-based scripts in my Windows VM, I'd appreciate it.

I also need not a USB Host Controller (which is something that comes with your USB CHIP, not a particular device's software), but a USB Composite Device thingamabobber. My printer still refuses to run in Windows because of this. If I can't think of something within a few days of getting my own Internet, I'll just buy Office for Mac or iWork for Mac and be done with it. I can't be going to this much trouble just to type documents up on my own damn laptop.

Yesterday I met up with Mike and his brother Dave in Akihabara. )

I suppose I should check the LJ Portal to see if anyone's got an upcoming birthday, because I might just be tempted to send a present...


Sep. 27th, 2006 11:32 am
azurite: (mai's twilight fades)
Last time I was in Japan, it took about 3 days before it really hit me that I was even IN Japan, because for all intents and purposes, it felt like home (San Francisco); it was cold, foggy, and rainy; it was crowded, it was busy. Sure, the cars went the other way, the driver's side was on the opposite side of the car, and vehicles mostly looked like they'd been through trash compactors, but generally, it didn't feel too different. That was a nice feeling, because if I followed through on my dream of working in some magazine's Tokyo office, or maybe translating manga, then I would be 'right at home' in Japan, right? Maybe.

I think I'm doing a decent job making my dorm 'homey' and everything- I have a bit more paperwork and phone calling to be done in regards to the phone and Internet, but I should be getting it dealt with soon.

Surprisingly enough, I got a message from Scott today- apparently he's given in and joined MySpace. Not that I think MySpace is all that -I think it's more of a phasal thing most of us went through in high school- but it IS good for keeping in touch and networking. Should I be a little hurt that a) his status is 'single' and b) he has no pictures of him and me together, but several of him with his brothers, mother, sisters, and friends? Ah... I know, 2 years, several thousand miles does not a relationship make. And as horribly Harlequin romance novel as it sounds, I'll wait. I'm just not interested in meeting anyone else. The possibility hasn't even crossed my mind. I'm keeping my MySpace status as 'In a Relationship' because I hate getting propositioned by weird people on an online site, and because I don't want to meet anyone right now, or even when I get back.

So I've officially been to all of my classes so far- Japanese isn't as bad as I thought it would be, and today's class was helpful for those situations at restaurants when you want to ask for things you really take for granted in English- paying separately, breaking a large bill, or getting a dish without such-and-such. Alas, I have to remember to ask Nakagawa-sensei 'Can I ask a question in English?'

Yesterday I was in Religious Studies and Pop Culture (two separate classes, though Religious Studies DOES have a modern culture element, taught by -oh, yes, I laughed too- Yoda-sensei). Religious Studies was a bit slow, but it sounds like it'll be interesting, and I think I might be able to get some GE credit for it. Plus I do want to learn more about Buddhism than I could understand from Scott, and more about Shintoism than I know from class and mythology. Pop Culture was downright fun- we watched a portion of Akira, and a scene from a movie called 'Dragon Head' -both apocalyptic movies. The latter I'd love to see the rest of, but truthfully, Akira doesn't compel me as much. Even better, my roommate Midori is in my Pop Culture class!

Right now I just feel kind of out of it -maybe it was the 'single' bit on Scott's MySpace (even though I tell myself it's not a big deal), or the fact that I had to practice writing out his new address in Cyrillic (not my forté). In any case, I think I should buy a Coke and then head back to the dorms for a PB&J, and find out what's up with my Internet from Midori and's Jimmie Jenkins.
azurite: (roses are red)
Uh... hi! It feels like it's been much longer than it probably has, but as everyone knows, I have an excuse. But first, MORE excuses!

If you got a SPAM email or two from me (or sent to any of your MLs, whatever), I apologize... I had a bit of a browser malfunction in regards to my email client (GMail) and it sent this mass email to all 129 people in my GMail address book, when I wanted to select only a few. -_- Again, I apologize-- please don't think any less of me for it. If it makes you feel better, I got 129 x 2 messages too, plus a lot of "bounced" emails from dead emails, and the occasional "YOU SPAMMED ME, BITCH!?" emails. Okay, none of those, but a few O_O YOU SPAMZORED? ones.

Yes. Anyway, this is my first LJ entry posted using xJournal on my shiny new Mac Book Pro! I'm still navigating my way around this thing, but I'm actually LIKING being a Mac person now. o_o Someone shoot me, I think the world has inverted and I'm really Teews Htiderem! I got suckered into getting a free printer and iPod Nano (I let Mom keep the latter, but it seems to be befuddling her, which I find adorable), but so far the ProCare and the Apple Protection Plan have proved worth it. I got all my PC data transferred onto here, though all my pictures and music are horribly disorganized (IMHO, compared to my PC). Things that SHOULD have been on here are mysteriously NOT, and I don't know why-- so rather than try and find each and every individual file (with the exception of a few songs detectable in Playlist comparisons), I might end up burning a whole spindle of CDs to backup my PC files.

...Then I have to clear ALL my settings from the shit Dell, move the computer BACK downstairs, and clean up my room. I've already got my new bed (formerly Scott's bed) in here, with a rearranged endtable set up, but other than that, it's the same mess as it was before Scott and I spent our weekend in Costa Mesa, at the very nice Westin South Coast Plaza.

So yes, that was my not-so-secret plan for the weekend-- and at first (scarily, almost as predicted... I mean, I tend to envision the worst case scenario, so short of Scott acting like a troll from FFR or an OOC character from an anime...), what happened at first was almost my Worst Case Scenario That's Realistically Possible. Basically, it took a lot longer to get to Costa Mesa than expected, parking was hard to find and not clearly marked, and they were doing loud and dusty construction on the revolving door right as we arrived.

But a good half hour into us getting into our room, things calmed down. Admittedly, I liked the Heavenly Beds (Westin's signature bed and bath collection is called "Heavenly" and for good reason) more than Scott did-- he said he had headaches and insomnia most of the weekend, but somehow we still had a good time. We didn't go to Universal, or go anywhere to a super fancy dinner, but I did still get to wear my dresses and spend precious time with Scott-- and that's what counted. Hell, I even got to go shopping as a bonus-- and I got the purse that I've wanted for years now (for no apparent reason), the Dooney and Burke "It" Alto Bag with the rainbow printed signature line on ivory weather-coated leather! :D It's even cheaper from the official store than it is online, so I'm thrilled. I actually got away with "murder" (it's an expression...) in terms of shopping the past few days... clothes, purses, makeup... whee.

I've still got lots left to do before Japan though-- namely go back to CSUN to clear up some stuff regarding class equivalency, get a fax from the Graduate Studies and International Programs director, email Prof. Hirota, and PACK! Euuugh. And of course, I have to be on my freaking rag. LOVELY. *gnaw gnaw*
azurite: (screw it trashcan)
This gets a whole new post due to the insanity of it all.
On the return flight back to Burbank (SFO -> BUR), I found out 5 minutes before we were due to arrive at the airport (approximately 1 hour before our flight was scheduled to take off, the recommended time to come in to deal with security and whatnot) that our flight had been cancelled. The automated message didn't say why. But we didn't turn around; being so close to the airport, we all just decided to find out what was what and see what we would be compensated with. The message DID say we had been rescheduled for a flight to Burbank the next morning, but that would mean schlepping all the way back to SFO and imposing on my mom-- plus unpacking, after we'd spent so much time PACKING!

So Scott, Mom, and I all got out while Gary guarded the car; Mom and I (more Mom, since she is not fun to deal with when you piss her off) talked to a customer service person. Mom went a little over the top, but in the end, Scott and I got our flight changed to one that was supposed to leave at 9:30 (instead of 7:15, our original flight). So it was a few extra hours at the airport, but SFO had lots of food and stores, so why not?

We noticed that on our new boarding passes, the original time for the flight (SFO -> LAX) was actually 8:07, and it had gotten rescheduled. But we thought nothing of it, so we went to get some food at the food court nearest our gate. As I went to the bathroom, I noticed there were no outbound flights to Los Angeles leaving at 9:30. There was one at 9:40, and after I checked with Scott, I confirmed the flight number-- our flight had been delayed by 10 minutes. No big deal, right?

We'd already hung out at the bookstore and I'd had a Noah's bagel from earlier; now after dinner, we just decided to head to the gate, about a half hour before our boarding time. But when we got there, the flight got rescheduled to 10:00. Then 10:20. Then 10:30. Then finally, 11:20. Initially, it was because of monsoon/thunderstorms over the middle of the state, which the airline refused to fly over. So why not fly over the ocean? We ended up doing that anyway. Then it was because they had no pilot, and even when we finally got a pilot, we didn't have enough flight attendants. Then the flight attendants came-- three more than we needed. We finally got underway, after five hours.

The plane was nice, and I even got some shut-eye, but when we got to LAX, there was more confusion. The rep from SFO had told us to tell a United Representative at LAX that we'd initially been scheduled for Burbank, and we had a shuttle waiting there for us. Since everyone from our flight had either been directed toward this flight or the one for the following morning, we wouldn't be alone; we'd all take the shuttle from LAX to BUR, and just take a shuttle from there, right? Wrong. 41 people from the rescheduled flight cancelled, so we had no way of getting any sort of upgrade or compensation. We basically waited HOURS for nothing.

On top of that, Burbank closed at midnight or so, so there was no point in having United shuttle us there if Super Shuttle wouldn't pick us up. So after standing in plenty of lines, schlepping our luggage around (I got a SmartKart for $3, but it made my life easier for a few hours), and talking to plenty of people, another United rep gave us a $51 voucher for the shuttle. We paid $31 for the shuttle from Burbank; from LAX it would have been slightly more, so the $51 *was* generous, but it hardly made up for all the waiting and the lack of information. Matter of fact, it almost didn't help at all, because Super Shuttle apparently didn't have enough shuttles (3 7-person vans -_-) to take us back to Northridge-- they were all going elsewhere, like to Glendale, Pasadena, and Anaheim. We had to do some juggling with Primetime Shuttle (the company I hate, because I feel unsafe with them), and we got to Northridge-- I even slept in the car, while Scott directed a driver who had NO idea where the hell he was with where to go.

And we got home... at 3:30am. It was still blazing hot though, so we slept with no blankets, the fan on full blast, and the air conditioning on. Neither of us got much sleep; Scott woke up around 9:30 or 10 to start getting ready to leave, and though I was still dead tired and even more overheated, I woke up with him, because I wanted to say goodbye and everything. And so it went, and we said "goodbye" or at least, "I'll see you later."

Scott seems to have made up his mind about the Peace Corps; he doesn't want to wait until next year to MAYBE get an Asian assignment, so he'll settle for whatever he gets in Central Asia, i.e. Kazakhstan or Azerbaijan. If I had to do the picking, I'd pick the latter, but... well, I just wish Scott wouldn't feel like he HAS to pick the Peace Corps because he got all those medical tests for it, did all that paperwork, etc. Yes, it looks great on your resume, and yes, it's longer, possibly more rewarding... but I just don't want him to be unreachable, or in danger because of wars in that area (very close to the Middle East).

He also has the option of getting something guaranteed IN JAPAN from the Oxford TEFL seminars, but who knows when and where that will pan out? I just hope he lets me know soon, and everything will somehow work out.

But needless to say, neither of us are flying United again if we can help it. I think I'll have to, for Japan, but I hope international flights are the exception. :P Still, I want to write a complaint letter. I also want to make sure my mom doesn't get charged for a shuttle we couldn't arrive on time to take, considering we weren't even at the right airport. :P
azurite: (skip*beat kyouko)
At last, the San Francisco recap post... assuming I can actually remember most of what happened.

Saturday, July 15th - Scott came over around noon, not long before our shuttle was supposed to have arrived. He was originally going to come over earlier, except his friend Brett got a job back down in San Diego, and since all of their other mutual friends were off partying, Scott decided to help him pack up, so he stayed the night in Burbank. It was weird for him to already be near the airport where WE needed to be, just to come 20 miles up north so he could take a shuttle BACK DOWN to Burbank, but oh well. :P

It was awkward at first, but the shuttle arrived soon enough and we were off. After wandering out the paltry selection of stores and restaurants (read: less than half of each) in the United/American Airlines terminal, we sat down and had some snacks, at which point it was silently "decided" that to hell with it, call us whatever you will, we are what we are and we feel the way we do, so screw it. So yes, I suppose we were acting like boyfriend and girlfriend, even if that "definition" hardly applied to us. He was very sweet and affectionate to me, and even though initially I was scared of that meaning I would have a harder time of saying goodbye to him when the time came (Peace Corps taking him to Central Asia, me going to Japan), I'm not stupid enough to deny affection and attention when it's offered and WANTED.

We managed to get to San Francisco just fine; the plane was horribly small and the drink selection terrible (Pepsi! EEEUCK!), but at least we made it on time. We took the BART (I got a little lost at the SFO station) to Daly City, and bought a 7-day passport at the airport for $24/each. Then we took the 28 to Fulton and met my mom at the house. :} We hung around for a while, got dressed, and then headed out to downtown, where we'd take another BART to West Oakland to go to the Fire Arts festival. Aside from the usual loonies hanging around at the BART station, there was no problem. We got off at our stop and, just as dad said, we knew immediately where to go-- right toward the pillar of fire.

*grin* The Fire Arts festival is something my dad raved about last year, hosted by The Crucible, a fire-arts school that focuses on things like metalwork, electric work, glass blowing, and the like. We had to work our way through a windy, twisty line, but at last we made it in -even though a group of snotty bitches cut us in line. I hate that! I really do! But anyway, we got in, met my dad at the bar, and then looked around. The first thing I noticed was DDR on a wide projection screen, so we headed over there-- and sure enough, they were doing something called "Dance Dance Immolation," a modified version of Stepmania with "fire" themes. The modes were renamed (Light was Burner, Standard was Raver, and Heavy became Asshole; the description of the latter was "Your arcade misses you") and the gauge became a danger thermometer-- you know, like you see on nuclear reactors, or on the modified DeLorean in Back to the Future part III?

We watched a few people in flame retardent suits attempt to DDR, but needless to say, they all sucked. No one seemed to know what DDR was or how to play it... so when the event coordinator walked around and asked for volunteers, I surprised myself by speaking up. I was wearing leather pants and a vinyl tube top and 3-4" Tommy Hilfiger leather boots, but I shimmied out of the tube top and into a red cotton sleeved shirt, and after much waiting and confusion about suit sizes, I was up there, an oxygen tube strapped to my back, a silver suit concealing my identity... and I DDRd while flames shot in my face.

I shit you not. FLAMES. IN MY FACE.

The guy I was playing with said he'd DDRd before, but we agreed to let each other pick songs. But they'd renamed all the submenus too, so I couldn't find the song I wanted, so I got stuck with Mobo*Moga or something for my first song. I aced it anyway. ;} I got Breakdown for the second song, and aced that, but by the third stage, I was so tired from the heaviness of the suit and my sore feet, I started to stumble while playing Butterfly. The guy controlling the game refused to let me do any speed or step modifiers, saying "This isn't DDR, this is Dance Dance IMMOLATION!" And immolation is right, because even though I still did okay on Butterfly, I got flames in my face plenty of times. It wasn't until the suit was off that I realized how grateful I was for the oxygen tube. I was sweating terribly but DAMN that felt good!

Not too many people can say they aced DDR while flames shot in their face. :D Boo yeah, baby.

Read more... )
azurite: (escaflowne destiny)
Hm, most people on my FL probably know I have some interest in Tarot, and I've been a practitioner of of what I'm going to call "the predictive arts" for many years now. It's funny that I'm so attuned to my own deck, mainly because it started out as my sister's deck, and for many years after her death, the cards remained in a buffet drawer, forgotten. But when they were passed onto me, I could feel their energy -my sister's energy- and they've been with me ever since. I don't do fortunes that often, and for a long while, I had Hitomi (Escaflowne)-esque reservations against reading for myself. That's changed, as I'm not the Princess of the Apocalypse or anything, so when I'm feeling very lost and confused, I'll do my own reading.

I also believe in the teachings of Feng Shui, and I know for a fact that my room is just full of yucky energy (bad chi) right now, because it's a complete mess. Once my 40 hours of work this week are over, work will be back to 8am-5pm (hours that we're open), and my work will be limited... which is actually a good thing. Then I can sit down and finish all my open projects, or at least the ones that aren't so all-consuming. Then my room can get clean, and hopefully with it, there'll be restoration of inspiration and motivation.

Back to the Tarot though; I don't like doing readings in negative spaces, and it tends to reflect in my readings -they won't make sense or I'll be way off base- if I'm not in a comfortable environment. So instead of doing a physical card reading, I did a virtual one, with my Wise Tarot program. It's a free little program where you can select the decks (and even customize your own, if you have the time) and choose from a variety of spreads, and it's had amazingly accurate results with my personal readings in the past. Tonight was no exception. I figure even if it's a virtual deck, I spend so much time on this computer that my energy is just flowing through and around it, and if this reading is any indication, it's true!

The reading )

Sometimes all it takes is a little "supernatural" push to get me going. It's funny how I was talking to Scott earlier, and he was saying how I had so much to get off my chest, and I didn't even realize it until he commented, and I realized I'd said so much. Even Steve came by and commented on how fast I was typing (admittedly, that's when I was doing my LJ entry earlier, after I stopped speaking to Scott for the morning/early afternoon), so I guess I do have a lot to get out.

And what [ profile] pockyken said makes sense too, and I ruminated on that a bit when I got home (I decided just going to sleep for a while would help me clear my brain, and it did). Humans can do one thing at a time excellently, and everything else at the same time on a mediocre level. So if I focus on one thing at a time, and really throw myself into it, I can enjoy myself. Maybe life is like a fanfiction, and I have to finish one thing that I've started before trying to move on, or else I'll just have confusion, loose ends and blocks everywhere.

Well, I'm hoping I can finish WDKY24, so that'll be it for me. I'll catch up on LJs and emails, and then try my hand at ficcing for the night.
azurite: (absolut wank)
Ugh... Just UGH! I just barely managed to get my profile on [ profile] guardian_kysra finished and turned in at 1:30 (I wish I could have done better, because there were other things I wanted to focus on. Alas, stress and a bunch of customers prevented me from saying what I wanted or getting it done on time). It was due at 1, but luckily (or unluckily?) the professor was still there, and he took it. Whether he'll actually read it and grade it, or grade me down for it being 30 minutes late is beyond me. I just want to pass the class. :P A C or better is what I need.

Then came my Japanese final, which was harder than I expected- I forgot the kanji for hospital and family, and I wasn't sure if I got the past affirmative verb copula chart filled in correctly (we had noboru, shinu, wasureru, tsukau, and one other I can't remember). There was about 7 things I think I may have missed on which disappoints me. I can make excuses -and they are legit, and you'd know if you've read any of my past FO entries- but it doesn't justify not having all this stuff done BEFORE I got sick, or before Scott and I had our "talks."

Well, tomorrow is my last final in Women Writers of Asia, and we'll have some hopefully simple IDing to do, and then a potluck-type party. I'm planning on getting some Chinese food for everyone, so I hope someone brings enough plates. Maybe if I order early, I can get the lunchtime discount? I know I should get at least one chicken, one beef, and one vegetarian dish, so I need to go home and peruse the menu and see how much this'll damage me. I already made a reservation for my shuttle to the airport on Friday and back home on Monday, so Baba and Grandpa can just give me cash for that (because they said they'd pay for it), and I can also get money by selling my English and Women Writers of Asia books back to the bookstore... I hope.

My nose is horribly congested, I sound terrible, and I admit, I'm still incredibly sad about this whole Scott thing. It's not like we'll even be able to talk much for the next three weeks, because his TEFL class starts this weekend. I told him I'd call before going to Fanime, and I will, but... well, I'm worried it'll be awkward. To be honest, even if "nothing is changing, really" in terms of the relationship (or lack thereof, or what we call it, or whatever), it still FELT like a break-up to me. And having everything I want told to me, and then stuck with a BUT... "Deep in my heart, I know that's not the path for me, and it might never be" is sort of like sticking a beautiful dagger into me and just TWISTING it. Or something. My analogies suck lately.

Everything sucks lately.

Fanime better rock or else I'll have one more reason to get drunk with Rochelle and Stephanie on Friday.

[ profile] schmollieollie, if you read this, tell Rochelle in advance so I don't have to explain all this BS to her. I just want to have fun with you guys, not keep you in the dark or recall all the pain I've been going through this week.

The Worst Weeks of Mer's Life
#5 - This week
#4 - The week where I thought I had TSS, and I couldn't eat anything but plain toasted bagels
#3 - The week Scott broke up with me the first time
#2 - The week when I got rejected from SFSU and I wasn't sure what would happen to me
#1 - The week following my sister's death

Also on the list:
-The week when Joe broke up with me
-The week when I got fired from the movie theatre
-The week when my mom was an angry, abusive bitch
-The week (and 2 years following) my dad becoming estranged the first time
-The week when Chris Garcia told Amy to tell me never to speak to him again
-The week when I found out my hard crush liked one of my best friends
And probably a few more I really don't want to think about. But just to let you know, this week RANKS.
azurite: (unforgotten uranepu)
1. I'll respond with something random I like about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll name something we should do together.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (or just me).
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll leave you a quote that is somehow appropriate to you.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal so you can do the same for other people

Okay, so who remembers I'm looking at you [ profile] schmollieollie! You remember when we used to take all those random tests-- the infamously long IQ test, the stupid tests about dreams, your presidential match, etc.? Well, I know they became "Tickle" a while ago, but I just wanted to see if they still stored my old test results, because I must have taken at least a hundred tests there. No luck. I tried signing in with all 3 of my old emails (and I do have more, but I don't use them to sign up for sites), but it couldn't find any matching email. So I signed up under my new email, and I imagine I'll be taking all the goofy tests again. :D

Boys, ends, and beginnings )
azurite: (yuna summons)
Well, what a weekend. Short, but nice.

^^ Scott, Baba and Grandpa all chipped in to get me a wonderful, simple-to-use digital camera for my birthday! It's a Sony Cyber-shot DSC-S600. I had to buy a Targus camera case (a little big... but it was only $20. The sad part is, I can't fit any of the manuals in there!) and an additional 512MB memory card (Sony Memory Chip Pro Duo Or Duo Pro or something. Same thing that goes in PSPs), but other than that, TEH YAY! I already took some pictures, so later on, I'll upload them to my LJ Scrapbook.

I got the latter two things at Fry's-- my first adventure there. I was sorely tempted (for whatever bizarre reason) to buy Zack that gift certificate I "mentioned" (note: did not PROMISE) if he gave me a ride home every Friday for the rest of the semester. But you know what? Why should I? I mean, yeah, his birthday was March 6th or whatever, but I've hardly known him for 3 mos., and I'm a broke college student. He's making tons more money than me, and pulling more hours, too! And for all the times he's been nice/sweet/thoughtful/remotely attractive, he's also been teasing, rude, hurtful, and a general jerk. And he DID say that if I needed rides home on Fridays for the rest of the semester, I "don't even have to ask." He'll assume I do, unless I tell him otherwise. And he didn't insist or even mention that I might need to pay him back, or reimburse him for the gas somehow.

So that's that. (If he strangely gets ME a birthday present, I might consider getting him something later on. Call it fair play.)

I also got the movie "Maverick" (ah, the days when Mel Gibson ACTED!), some candy (all gone now. Note to self: never mix Skittles smoothie flavors), and a Netgear Wireless Adapter USB card... which I've already plugged in and is working fine. YAY! Soon, I'll be able to move/trash this desk downstairs in the rec room and move the computer up to my room... where it SHOULD be. :P I might have to do that with Scott after Passover though, just because everyone "needing" to use the computer (and considering I've paid for so much to fix/maintain this computer, it's just as much mine as Grandpa's. And if we switch to Roadrunner Broadband, I could pay Grandpa for Net access, and then it essentially WOULD be my computer) would whine about it.

What else? Skinny-dipped for the first time. *laughs* Don't tell, okay? Hey, I didn't have a swimsuit! I woke up early both yesterday and today, and today we walked Scott's parents' dog, Chica, around the hill where they live. They also have a blind-as-a-bat cat, Molly, a cancer kitty, who meowed plaintively this morning while Scott and I were in bed. ^^; For an old kitty, she sure manages to be loud!

I've also gotten a bit inspired for more of WDKY and its sequels (FINALLY!). I can't spoil anything for CO7 or ED, but for WDKY:
Implicit Promise: Life is change. Téa and Seto will somehow find romance despite all the obstacles that their complex lives throw in their path. They will both learn, live, love, and grow-- and change in the process, for better or for worse.
Protagonists: Téa, mainly, but also Seto, and occasionally Mokuba, Joey, and Yugi.
Point-of-View Character: Almost always Téa, even though the story is written from the 3rd-person omniscient perspective. This allows me to switch gears and get into other characters' heads, and reveal events that Téa and the the others wouldn't know about.
Climax: Coming soon. I mean it this time. :D (And you thought the PAST chapters were climatic! BWAHAHHA!)

Finally, I BEAT THE DEN OF WOE! I brought FFX-2 to work the other night, and just before we were supposed to leave, I managed to beat Nooj (pain in the ass that he is) with a team of Mascot, Gun Mage, and Alchemist. Yuna and Rikku both died several times, due to their low HP (around level 56 for everyone), but I had Rikku (once she was alive) mix up a Supreme Gem with a Blessed Gem, and BAAAAAAAAMMO! This nifty Mix called a Sunburst, which got Nooj for over 8100 damage! :D Fine, so I didn't get any of the cool Blue Bullets, but whatever. That's what New Game++ is for! Anyway, I'm FINALLY at 98%, so I go to look up 100% Completion Guides, just to make sure I don't screw anything up.

And then I stumble on this whole thing about FFVII and FFX being connected?! WHAR!? But the theories and evidence are actually quite cool. I feel kind of lame for not having seen it before, but then, I never did finish playing FFVII. I'll probably be more into it if/when they release the remake for PS2/PS3, with better graphics. I hated the so-called 3-D chunk graphics in FFVII. ;_;

So anyway, I got to have some more fun with the game later tonight. I took a nap earlier after I helped the guys (that is, Ryan, Scott, Jeff, and John) clean the house, so I'm kind of wired. I also had a Snapple on the too-too crowded train, and I'm glad to be able to bounce around and not bump into people or stumble off to the side.

Ah, to be home! And it's almost April/Spring Break/time to find out about Japan! EEEEEEK!
azurite: (Default)
I'm not someone who just sits around and writes in LJ all day. Honest. I actually go to university. :P And today I got my 10-question Weather & Climate test back, along with my "midterm" (I guess?) paper on traveling from Crescent City across the state (describing the geographical features we'd seen on our way). I got a 80% on the first one, and a 14.5/15 points on the second. So it's not perfect, but I'm pleased. :)

o_o... would someone please tell me why I have 132 userpics? No, not really-- I only have 81, but there are 132 SLOTS. ;_; That's too many! I NEED MORE ICONS! (I don't have that many lying around... at least, not that many that I haven't used already and WANT to use again)

Too many people have birthdays in March. *shakes fist* And me without my rainbow-colored font colorizer. Maybe I'll take a page from [ profile] crpsaiyan's book and make a massive monthly-themed birthday image and put everyone's name on it. :P

Speaking of birthdays and birthday-type food, does America have a Cupcake Day? I mean, we have National Craft Month and Hug Your Dog day (maybe?)... every day and every month is something; every color and pattern has some sort of significance. We're holiday-crazy. I want a Cupcake Day. [ profile] mklutz says she had one on the anniversary of her school (founding, perhaps?) and they actually had a RAINBOW of CUPCAKES. Who the hell wouldn't want one of those? I've actually been (unreasonably) craving cupcakes for a while. Just one, delicious rainbow-cupcake, and I'd be a happy camper. In the meantime, CUPCAKE DAY, DAMMIT! Quite possibly on my birthday.

Hawaiian cupcakes? *shrugs* Why not?

Back to the fun that is Carmen Electra's Aerobic Striptease, I find it incredibly difficult to do that whole "wiggle" thing where you shift the top part of your body to the side, but without moving your hips or feet. As in, moving just your chest using your ribcage. o_o... This makes it harder to do the full body roll, because even though I can do the "Cat Cowl" thing, trying to combine all the moves into one causes me to become really short of breath, for some weird reason. But for everything else, I breathe just fine. I know I'll never be able to do the workout on Mondays, because I'm so busy, but I can do it for the rest of the week.

Scott finally "guessed" (I dropped about 10 tons worth of hints; sometimes that boy is so adorably dense) about what I'd got, and he was pleasantly 'surprised.' He was working out too, to build up his own endurance (and for me, he said. That makes me giggle). So now we're "even." He's definitely coming up here for Passover now, just to see if he can get a sneak preview of me supposedly knowing how to striptease. *laughs* something tells me I'm going to turn into a potted plant and not be able to do it without looking stupid.

When I have some free time:
* Get a wireless card
* Move everything around/clean for Passover (since I won't be here during Spring Break)
* Finish up my scholarship applications
* Finish up my 5 on-hold fics for [ profile] 30kisses - "Kaiba the Virgin Sacrifice," "Girls' Club", "Sight Unseen," "Voice," and "Someone Else's Wife." Just by looking at the titles, which TWO would you want to read the most? ([ profile] atlantian_magic, if you read this, your choice is important. It's your birthday coming up, and I wanna give you a fic. :P)
* Layouts? Everywhere (LJ,, etc). I need to get the site-formerly-known-as-AMC up. I need a new site title. HELP!
* Tax return? Hey, it was $100 I didn't have before. And now the damn school is jumping down my throat over it. So I need a 'dependent' verification form (shiz. Am I still considered a dependent in school/legal/medical terms, even though Mom doesn't financially support me?), her tax return (copy), and my tax return (ugh).

So much for the end of stress. I can't wait until spring break.
azurite: (kitty catch)
* Black bikini top $17.99
* Black and white (with pattern) "boy-short" swimsuit bottoms $17.99
* C-size batteries for portable speakers $5.19
* Batman Begins Special Edition 2-disc DVD $22.99
* Cushioned bathmat with suction cups $9.99
* Kodak one-time use disposable underwater camera $9.99

Learning how to striptease and get fit with Carmen Electra's Aerobic Striptease... PRICELESS. (Actually, it was $18.36, and whose idea was it, anyway?)

WOW. I just worked out for an hour straight, and I didn't even think about it. Sure, there's hardly enough room here in the rec room, but I can remedy that by...
a) getting a wireless card for this hunk o' junk computer ($50)
b) moving the computer upstairs to my room (also gives me the excuse to clean off my desk)
c) moving this junk desk elsewhere... maybe the garage! (okay, it's not a junk desk, it just collects a TON of dust back here, holds very little with NO compartments on the side or top, and only one drawer thing that always gets stuck if you open it wrong)
d) moving the long couch and coffee table backward
e) practicing until my thighs don't look like bowling pins anymore

o_o One hour a day? That's like, nothing. I could fit that into EVERY DAY except Monday (because no, I will not do it at work and be caught on camera). It's fun (Carmen Electra is so... CUTE! X_X I can't believe I'd use that word to describe her, but IT DOES!), and I can actually feel it working! Plus, it's useful... ^^ I'm probably driving Scott crazy with all the hints I've been dropping about this since I finished my routine about 15 minutes ago (I'm TMing him all sorts of naughty clues, poor boy). There's a reason why they say on back of the box: "feel great and spice up your personal life."

Even better, I have songs already that are non-DVD (I like how you can change audio tracks on the DVD for the Runthrough portion of the Routines) that would actually FIT with the routines! I'm not kidding. Kelly Clarkson's "Miss Independent" has JUST the right beat for it!

...Yeah, I know I'm crazy, but at least I'll look hot in Hawaii... and on top of that, I'll give Scott and excuse to get his butt up here for Passover, even if family gatherings weird him out.

So let's see... I didn't manage to fix my layout problem. I must have changed my layout about 3 or 4 times today. For some reason, I was using an external style sheet for my tweaked Flexible Squares layout, and it was causing the text color to be wrong in my sidebar. When I changed it, all things went to hell, so I went and got a proper tutorial on adding a Header image to the FlexiSquares. That erased my color preferences, so I had to redo them. Now it's okay, but it's still IRRITATING. I'd like to use the new header image I'm about 1/4 done with, but I need to get that whole pattern thing (see my last post) figured out.

I ended up using three others...
(1) Grunge (which wasn't displaying my friends' page, so until someone gets back to me on that, I won't use it)
(2) Mellifluous (which is nice, but narrow, with no support for tags)
(3) Butterfly (from, also no tags support. Not as narrow, but I don't like not seeing user icons)

I also like The Boxer and Tranquility II, so if I can figure out ways to really edit those and make them look original, I'd like to.

Anyway, I have to finish...
(1) planning Passover, because we have too many people and not enough places to sleep
(2) watching Batman Begins, because it is TEH shit and Christian Bale is TEH SHIT (and of course, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, and Liam Neeson)
(3) working on WDKY24, because even if I get the history right (still need to tweak some things), I screwed over this one scene I wrote by doing it out of order. I also got plotbunnied for a later chapter, which might change things...
(4) commenting everywhere, because the [ profile] 30kisses tagging system has suddenly exploded on itself, after all the hard work of [ profile] svelterose and others (myself included); on [ profile] fanficrants, where troll-chan [ profile] aguitarist has made a special guest wanker appearance; on [ profile] playthedamncard, because I WANNA! And everywhere else it suits me. I'd also like to figure out this whole journal thing, but it's a slow process. In the meantime, I don't actually have to use the Styles. :P

*runs around* And I still have to teach some Education majors about Dreamweaver tomorrow morning at school (and not get paid! Why am I so nice!?) and write 3 query letters! WAUGH WAUGH WAUGH!


Mar. 6th, 2006 12:13 am
azurite: (darwin power!)
I actually didn't watch the Oscars tonight. I caught the last 5 minutes of it, just because Baba was complaining about all the women not wearing bras. Like you're supposed to NOTICE or something. I know it's obvious with some (tacky) women, but usually there's an artful away around that. I used to watch for the fashion, but MEH! I just wasn't interested this year.

I ended up napping most of the afternoon away; not because I didn't get much sleep last night (though that was PART of it... ^_~), but just because tiredness compounds on tiredness for whatever weird reason. I slept in the car ride, likely because I didn't like Erin's taste in music much, and she blasted it so loud that my iPod barely had any effect. So instinctively I fell asleep to ignore the music. ^^;

As it turned out, the visit to San Diego was shorter than I thought; I thought Erin and I would be leaving at 10-11 tonight, not 10-11 in the morning. And even though Scott did the right thing by asking Erin for sure what time she planned to leave, we ended up leaving Joyce's new house late in the morning, anyway. Not that it was a bad thing-- I got to eat a delicious breakfast (bagel & cheese, eggs, and orange juice) in their new kitchen. Last night I wanted to stick around for a yummy dinner, but they were just starting to make it as Erin and I arrived, and Scott planned to pick me up after he and the guys (Aaron & John) ate dinner at a Greek place. So they picked me up on their way back, and I couldn't stick around for however long it would take to speed-cook everything else. ;_; But I'll get to enjoy a yummy dinner next time, whenever that may be.

I got to see David again, as well as Camp Pendleton (where Erin's boyfriend, Elliott, is stationed for now)... man, it looks different from what I remember. I actually don't remember it as well as I thought, or when I was there with the ROTC in the summer between sophomore and junior years, I was only on one side of the base. It is one of the biggest bases in the country, from what I've heard.

Scott and I spent the whole night together --and I guess I've gotten used to the weirdness that is "guys." It was one thing to be around guys like Vince, Jimmy, "God" and et al., but Scott's friends and twin brother are a whole other breed. They were funny (albeit gross at times), and we had fun watching the first 3/4 of Predator before Scott and I called it a night. I was tired after my quick dinner (Macaroni and Cheese) with coconut rum & coke.

Serious stuff. )
azurite: (cat and mouse)
I had a very strange dream this morning. I don't remember all of it, and what I do remember isn't very clear, but I remember that I was with Scott somewhere, at a carnival or event or something. He said something that upset me, and I gave him a sad/upset look and stalked off. He came after me a second later, calling to me to get me to stop, so I ended up walking around a corner (with trees on it; we were on a dirt path) and sitting at a wooden picnic table. We were talking (sitting next to one another) on the bench when a group of girls came up to us, asking us for something. I think they wanted us to buy tickets or something, because I distinctly remember orange, ticket-like things. I asked what it (a game) entailed, and I remember her saying one thing, and then math, math, math (over and over again). I suddenly became aware that I was dreaming (I literally thought "Oh, I'm dreaming") and then I woke up-- and instead of "math, math, math" it was my alarm going off like crazy. ;_; I hate that alarm, but it's the only thing that wakes me up sometimes!

I also woke up with the strange need to do a tarot reading, which I kind of put off for a while. So during my overlap period, when another girl was manning the front desk here at the ITR Walk in center, I did a reading. Initially, I thought it was all bad news, because many of the cards were reversed, and I had some of the not-so-nice major arcana cards. In the end, I had 5 major cards and 5 minor cards, 2 cups, 2 pentacles, 1 sword, 8 odd and 2 even (I did a Celtic Cross reading, in case you want to know). The cards pretty much reinforced what I'd already started to think in regards to this whole Scott/Peace Corps, Me/Japan thing. It's a matter of being patient, not letting the past rule, control, or scare me, and letting things happen as they will. So, April ahoy!
azurite: (mokuba's 1024)
Happy Birthday DQBunny!

Super-Mod. Super-Evil.

It's raining crazy here, and I hate it. Born and raised in NorCal, but I still don't like the rain. Yet, I still like winter more than summer (likely because I hate getting sunburned more than I hate getting wet, even if it hasn't happened in a while... or more obviously, summer is when my sister died, and I hate being reminded), but right now, isn't it Spring? Geez, and we had that heatwave not all that long ago...

So the other day the rec room toilet flooded over mysteriously (as in, no one flushed it or anything), and I didn't figure this out till I came home from somewhere and, on my way to the restroom, I noticed the carpet was awfully wet and spongy. Well, I told Grandpa, since he's the expert plunger-man (I still can't figure out how to work one. And other women think "tires and testicles" give them problems!), but nothing worked. We already had 2 inches of water on the floor. So we had to call a plumber. He went into the main line and got out a clog or somesuch (the upstairs toilets were forcing pressure on the downstairs ones, apparently), but the carpet people never got back to us. So we were stuck putting baking soda on the smelly wet spots, and keeping the windows open and the fan on.

It's still not dry, and Baba and Grandpa have decided to replace the carpet. Better than dealing with mildew in my preferred hang-out room, I suppose. So we'll be saying goodbye to our off-white carpet, and saying hello to something a lot more water-resistant and stain-proof, if that's possible. I wonder what color we'll get?

All the stress today sort of fizzled out 3/4 of the way through my afternoon/evening shift at the walk-in center; I got a reply back from the Snowflake Embryo Adoption Agency, and I can call them back at any time for a more detailed interview (they sent me a press pack). I used Lexis-Nexis for some article digging, and I found out that the couple on 60 Minutes last week or so have actually been in the media for a while, and were even on HGTV! Curiouser and curiouser! Class was important -we learned the structure he wants us to use for our stories- but I was so sleepy! Half the class didn't even show up because of the rain (this is commonplace in SoCal. A "drizzle" equates to a "raging storm" in these parts). I managed to catch the most important parts, and I even managed my "first act" (the first chunk of the story), which needs just a bit more information to be revised. I'm surprised at how easily it came to me! I need to get a new anecdote though, because I can't use a "fake" secondhand one compiled from other articles and interviews!

Anyway, the one  of my day (aside from getting soaking wet, but that's trivial) was when a guy I was helping in the walk-in center pointed to the rather-inflamed zit on my chin and says "What's that, some sort of battle scar?" I think I was in shock for a minute before I tried to laugh it off and say "No, it's just girl problems." The guy persists, and says, "What, you got into a fight?" I wanted to smack him. Not only was he an idiot for putting the wrong MAC address for his wireless card into the system (he put his Bluetooth address, the ninny), but now he's talking to me about my face-- about an obvious zit as if it were some sort of scar, Kenshin-style? *rolls eyes* I think not! I told him "No, it's just a zit," and I promptly turned red and turned away. Jackass! Hence the sulfur-- I decided if it's that damn noticeable, I better up my Proactiv treatment, so I used the sulfur mask tonight. I might even do some dermabrasion before I go to bed. All the stress caused it, I tell you!

I'm going to try and relax more -meditate more, if I can remember. Right now I'm munching on macaroni and sipping a Watermelon Bacardi Silver, so I hope I'll go to bed relaxed. :)

The highlight of my day was when Scott responded to my doleful text message ("Sweet little wet kitty in need of cuddling!") by calling after my Japanese test (I think I did pretty well) and saying he needs to be in LA the weekend of the 10th (Peace Corps stuff), so can he come over? ^_^ Of course! Grandpa was baffled that I even asked permission! :D So I'm glad I'll be seeing him again so soon, and also before we both go on our Spring Breaks. Hopefully he can also come to Passover the weekend after we both get back.

I've finished my work for Women Writers of Asia tomorrow, though I have been putting off my reading for English. Much of what Walt Whitman wrote is just "too heavy" for me to handle! ;_; I keep getting gripped by this fear that I might actually fail a class this year -if not feature writing (JOUR 310), then Major American Writers (ENGL 275). If I fail just one, it'll screwball my plans for a summer 2008 graduation, and I'm pretty dead-set on being OUT of here by then. I don't know where I'll go or what I'll do afterward; much of it hinges on this coming year (Japan or no?) and my senior year (where I get my internship). But I don't want to be held back on account of one class and my fears/procrastinating habits/lack of understanding!

I have until the 15th to send off my 2nd Waseda application; I hope that Hirota-sensei will remember my recommendation tomorrow, and that Prof. Davidson will give me his on Wednesday like he said. I just have to fine-tune my essay (no copy-pasting) and fill out the 2nd (all in Japanese!) application. X_X I also have to get my photo copied at least four more times. -_-; Oh, and somewhere, somehow this week, I have to go back to Kaiser to have them say what I already know -I don't have TB! :P

Other than that, I really need to get on the bandwagon for communities (not a single entry for [ profile] ygo_offtopicon!? *wails*), my icons, and revising my Ranma fics. Seriously, I was guilty of stuff that I rant about! Fangirl Japanese among the least of my crimes. Reading Neon-Ronin's "The Truth and the Tempest" has reminded me of how much I need to improve, even in the fics department. There is no cutoff! The good can go bad, the best can be forgotten, and you can ALWAYS revise!

So even though I don't plan on staying up late tonight working on any of that, it's on my to-do list. :)

And now I need to find me some Ranma icons. :D I think I need icons for all of my fandoms. I've got Sailormoon, xxxHolic, Star Ocean EX, Hana Yori Dango, Gundam Wing (not really a fandom of mine, but that damn icon always makes me laugh), Final Fantasy X/X-2, Harry Potter, Yu-Gi-Oh, Lois & Clark, and even Escaflowne represented here, but no Full Metal Panic, Ranma, Inuyasha, Full Moon o Sagashite, Fushigi Yuugi, Ayashi no Ceres, etc... so point me at 'em! And don't I still owe someone a mood set? I swear I'll get on that when I have a free second. :P


Feb. 20th, 2006 11:18 am
azurite: (kisara dragons)
Alas, the weekend has come to an end! Am I some kind of weirdo for having classes today, when everyone else seems to be off work or school? I had a geography quiz today, and in a few hours I'll have a dialogue for memorization, two response drills (eugh), and I have to turn in my Listening Comprehension. My LCs have gotten a LOT harder since last semester; the speakers go so fast I can barely understand them! Last night the sheer speed of the speakers on the MP3 tracks got me so stressed out and worried about my homework -among other things- that I nearly started crying.

I guess it would make sense for me now to start freaking out-- I've gone half the distance and gotten letters of recommendation, filled out applications, sent forms, filled out my FAFSA, and all that blather. Now it's a matter of finishing up, writing more essays, getting more letters of recommendation, and getting into a program. I would hate myself if I didn't try at all, or if I quit halfway through, but likewise, I'm terrified of the prospect of actually getting in. I'd be leaving a lot behind -friends, family, material objects. What if I don't make it? What if I end up being a dissapointment to all the teachers that have called me brilliant, motivated, creative, and determined? What will happen to that part of my personality that is always looking for the unknown, or a great challenge? I love that wonderful sense of accomplishment when you achieve something, even if it doesn't mean money in your hands. I get giddy knowing I have a high GPA, or that I'm only 49 more units away from graduation and a degree-- a real degree!

And I believe in what my dad's drilled into my head all my life: reach for the stars, land on the moon/reach for the sidewalk, land in the gutter. I know I might be trying for the impossible, but I'll still go farther than I ever would have if I set my sights lower, because of my bad self-esteem or whatnot.

So here's the situation: I need more letters of recommendation. [ profile] janimelee, I know you said you were interested, and I would really appreciate it if you're still open to the offer. Likewise, [ profile] guardian_kysra, I don't know if you saved your old letter that you sent to my teacher, but if you have the DOC file saved, I would love it if you could help me out again.

This time, it's for Waseda University itself, not for a particular scholarship-- although there are other scholarships I'm applying to that will need letters, but considering they all mostly ask the same thing, what I'm really asking for is:
* Permission
* Your signature

Here's my current list of recommendations:
* Takase-sensei - 3 (1 for Waseda through CSU IP, 1 for Tokiwa, 1 for NSEP)
* Blumenkrantz - (1 for Tokiwa)
* [ profile] guardian_kysra - (1 for NSEP)
* Scott - (1 for NSEP)
* Salido - 1 for Waseda through CSU IP
* Hirota-sensei (1 for Presidential Scholar's faculty statement)

The Waseda University one seems to imply that it should be from a professor though-- so I'm hoping I can ask Prof. Hirota again, and possibly Prof. Davidson, my Geography teacher. I've had him twice now (including this year), and even though it's early in the semester and he might not remember me well, I hope he's willing to give me a recommendation based on what he DOES remember of me from previously. I'm willing to ask Salido or Blumenkrantz again; Scott gave me a copy of his letter so I could re-use it if necessary. Again, it's a matter of signature and permission though, so I don't want to be frivolous with these.

I'm also applying for other scholarships:
* The Bridging Scholarship
* The JASSO scholarship (if I get accepted; I can only apply if/when I get accepted)
* The Aurora Grant
* any others I find
Most of them seem to have deadlines in mid-March. The Tokiwa application is due on the 24th of this month; all I have to do is finish estimating the dates, attach my photos (make 4 more copies), and print it all out. I hope Blumenkrantz really did mail my 2nd letter of recomendation and that the people at Tokiwa didn't throw it out b/c they didn't have a matching application!

In any case, please let me know if you can help; I'll have more information when I'm at home (today's my long day).

A wonderful weekend )

And now I have to try and study for my Japanese.
Kono shigoto wa dono gurai kakarimasu ka?
Isshukan gurai deshou?
Jya, raigetsu no mikka goro dekimasu ne?
azurite: (shizuka o rly?)
Happy Birthday Nightbringers!

Geez, airplanes are confusing. So I finally got the tickets to Hawaii... but the cheapest flights leave from SFO. So Mom doesn't have to think much about getting to the airport; she can either take Bart or have Gary give her a ride. Me, though? I have to take a plane to take a bus to take a train to take a plane! In other words, go from Burbank to Oakland, from Oakland Airport via AirBART to the Bart station, then BART to SFO. Then from SFO, I meet up with Mom, and we take a 6:10pm plane to Hawaii. Though the flight is 5 hours long, we get there by 8pm. :D

So I printed out all these itineraries for myself for both sets of flights. I've also got to take Southwest back from Oakland once Mom and I get back to SFO, but it can't be the same night, because no planes seem to run after 10pm! So I'll stay at the house for a night, get back on the bus/train/plane deal again the next day, and be back home in SoCal by the following afternoon.

Still, this is after a week of luaus, shopping, beach combing, snorkeling, and other assorted fun activities. I already booked 2 passes for a 6 hour luau with dinner, a welcome breakfast orientation, and a book of coupons to print out beforehand. I have to remember to call this company and find out the exact times, and if pickup is available from the Sheraton Waikiki. Then I also have to remember to print my coupons 3 days from now. o_o;

BUT YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *sings* Spring break, spring break! (For the record, this is damaging me a little over $1200. Good thing I get paid from the bookstore on Friday, and next month's paycheck from ITR should be substantially more than the one I just got yesterday.) Mom also still owes me something like $800 for the remainder of the laptop, so I'm hoping she'll be treating me to a shopping spree while we're there. ^^; Hey, what? It IS my 21st birthday. :P

AAAAAAAND, best of all, Scott's going to be here in 50 minutes or thereabouts! *squeal* I have to act professional. *hem hem* I don't know what to do! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Black Magician Girl

Which Yu-Gi-Oh Girl Character are You? ()Includes Pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla

Oh yes: Look into my window, what do you see?
azurite: Part of the "What Doesn't Kill You" series of fanfic icons (wdky7)
Spring Break in Hawaii after all! WHOO HOO!

Early this morning Mom called me, saying she felt bad that she'd killed my good idea (and generous offer) to spend my spring break and birthday with her-- my treat, a trip to Hawaii. Her excuse was the kids, and she knew it was a bad one, so she changed her mind. I'm thrilled-- not because I don't want to see [ profile] rhapsody_dragon or [ profile] mklutz (I do! Though Mamono, I would probably only try to visit you at school and help you upstage that brat-that-shall-not-be-named, not stalk you at home. o_o;), but because I was just running low on other good ideas.

Mom got us reservations at the Sheraton Waikiki from the 9th to the 15th, so I'll need to get plane tickets-- I've searched all the major sites I can think of, but I still have to check STA travel tomorrow, in case they can still get me something cheaper without the hotel room package. I wonder how Mom's going to get here to LA, though? It'd be sort of stupid for us to fly on separate planes to Hawaii and meet up there... o_o; But I don't think I can afford paying for her ticket to LA, *AND* both our tickets to Honolulu. A ticket down here is only about $90 or so on Southwest from Burbank, so hopefully Mom won't see that as TOO much of a cost to spend a whole week with her loving daughter that she spent 36 hours in labor to bring into this wonderfully screwy world. :D

In other news, the Coworker-who-shall-not-be-named sucks. Even more than ever. Funny how this whole "I like him, I hate him" thing works. Well right now, I hate him, because his sense of humor is about as low as the Miranda Trench, and I don't like being teased in that weird, snotty way of his. I suppose it's partly my fault, because irritates me to the point where I make stupid comments, and then that leaves me open for his stupid retorts... Well. :P So he knows I have a "boyfriend" (quotes for you guys; you know me and my anti-label/who-the-fuck-cares status at the moment) and I hope that will shut him up, thinking I was or want to flirt with him. I met his girlfriend, she's nice, sweet, and... even without her, he's made a bad enough impression on me at this point that I do not care. Maybe it's not just an "older guys" thing, but a "older than the last guy." o_o Think about it. I've started a trend! Crush-wise, I started out liking guys in my grade. Then a grade or two over. Cunningham was 3 years above me; a senior while I was a freshman. My first boyfriend was already in college while I was still a junior, and Mike was around the same age, plus or minus. Lonnie was the kink in the chain, but then, he was practically inhuman, so he doesn't count. Then there was Scott, 5 years my senior. We have to keep going up-- going down proves fatal!

My PS2 premod has made it to Toledo, OH and is expected here by the 18th. Scott's coming tomorrow night, and I'm off work and school by 4pm, so I'll have enough time to clean up before he comes. :) I have no plans, no idea what he'll eat (he says he's been beefing up lately and eating 5x a day! o_O!), and I'm still as happy as a clam. I think I'll duel Parshath on JTP again, see if my new deck works. :>
azurite: (kaiba encounters fanfiction)
Okay, so I'm downstairs at the ITR walkin right now, putting up with the unfortunately attractive annoyance that is... er, my co-worker. But I'm in a fantastic mood, because:
* I turned in my Presidential Scholarship packet with everything, most of which was done at the last minute
* I gave Dr. Lopez's secretary my Freeman-ASIA form, so she can endorse it by Friday
* I finished my Japanese homework on time
* I ate a decent lunch AND I still have cookies leftover
* My group performed our Japanese skit first, and though I got corrected on two lines, I think we did well-- and better than other groups (though they were funnier-- we had a Spiderman and a Doc Ock, and a NEKO MAN!)
* My interview was much easier than I thought. It was in a small, comfortable room in the involvement center, and I was talking to Prof. Hirota, Dr. Lopez, and one other woman from the CSUN faculty-- that was it. No chancellor, no board of stodgy old men...
* I might be applicable for a $10,000 scholarship from the Japanese government if I get into the SA/Waseda program!
* I took my passport-sized pictures for my Tokiwa application; I'll estimate the dates tonight and get that printed out and turned in tomorrow.

My new shiny, dry-clean only blouse/jacket got completely pwned by a sweat stain as I tromped all over campus (to all the department offices for English, Japanese, and Journalism) and to the post office (to mail my transcript my Priority mail) and then back to the building where my Japanese class was. But it's faded now, and I'll be sure to get it dry cleaned asap. In any case, I'm glad I got this nice new outfit from thar boutique, Cubby, yesterday. I even got a pair of brown corduoy's... o_o If I get an orange plaid shirt, I can be the female clone of Scott! (creeeeppyyy...)

But since I got everything done and I'm in a good mood, feeling accomplished and happy, I bought a pizza. At least this means I'm responsible for my own dinner, even if What's His Face doesn't appreciate it. No one has even noticed my haircut! No one asked why I'm happy! Aw, who cares!? If I can keep this mood up through tomorrow (and score some free chocolate and/or flowers while I'm at it), all the better! I don't need to be some Absolute Boyfriend villainness, trying to steal other girls' boyfriends!

Scott's coming on Thursday night! I'll have PLENTY TO DO! *lecherous grin* Things are looking up! I think I might even write more of WDKY later tonight if I'm in the mood, and if I get an email confirming my payment for my new premodded PS2, things will be EVEN BETTER! :D


Feb. 11th, 2006 07:10 pm
azurite: (kaiba smirk)
Happy Birthday SvelteRose!

^_^ Party hard.

Snip-snip! )

Oh, and here's a quick reminder of all the communities I own/help mod:
[ profile] 30kisses - Everyone knows I created this as an alternative to [ profile] 30_kisses. We have several alternative lists, rules that are different, and several kick-ass mods. I update this one the most frequently.
[ profile] betasquad - The request-to-join community for anime, manga, and video game fanfic writers. I post all my un-beta'd WDKY chapters here, and I'd love it if more people signed up to join the comm. and the forum so I could have a regular supply of interested editors!
[ profile] delishidoodle - My icon journal-gone-community. I've just recently updated with a few icons, and hopefully more coming soon.
[ profile] smrff - The SailorMoon Romantic FanFiction Mailing List's official LJ community. If Aria's Ink can update regularly with fics, why can't we? I say we get WAFF vs. TAFF Day started early this year!
[ profile] titans_go - Co-modded with [ profile] baine. But we just haven't started it yet. Why can't I find a decent Teen Titans font!?
[ profile] weekly_ygo - I'm just the editor. :} But I'm also in the news, every now and then... I hope that post I made about Joey the Passion free online duels makes it into this week's edition.
[ profile] ygo_extend - I never got around to starting this comm anywhere, but it's meant to be a repository for those great oneshots that should be continued- if not by the original author, then fans with evil imaginations. It's also a challenge community for 1sentence and drabble fics to be fleshed out into something longer.
[ profile] ygo_goodfic - I co-mod it. Why don't more people bounce their recs our way?
[ profile] ygo_icontests - I own it-- it's meant to be sort of like [ profile] weekly_ygo, but for icontests. Many of the icontest owners were impossible to get ahold of, though.
[ profile] ygo_lyricwheel - I'm going to be restarting the next round soon, if anyone's interested. Any ideas for a theme?
[ profile] ygo_mst - Meant to be the place where you can be inspired by and write MSTs of Yu-Gi-Oh fics. MSTs being "Mystery Science Theatre" style, which is pure satire and humor. MSTs aren't allowed on FFnet, but they're great learning/teaching tools and good for several laughs. Someone send badfic "recs" over here! We need fodder!
[ profile] ygo_offtopicon - I'm starting up a new challenge this week, and I hope to keep it regular, this time. We never did finish Challenge #9, which is too bad, but I don't want to let this one die. I have a good idea!

I would appreciate any people interested in helping mod/update these communities. Comment if you can lend a hand at least once a week.

Snip again-- with a dictionary!? )

Coming up:
* Finish up my Freeman-ASIA scholarship form. Get the hardcopies sent in to IIE, and give the copies to Dr. Lopez in the Study Abroad office.

* Presidential Scholarship? Professor Hirota DID agree, and though it only needs an unofficial transcript from both CCSF and CSUN (I can print both from the web), it also requires Prof. Hirota's signature. -_-; Her office hours are only on Tuesday and Thursday before class, and the thing is due on MONDAY. Geeeeehhh... There goes a potential $5000 down the hole, all because I didn't prepare enough in advance. I could TRY and find her on Monday, but there's just no guarantee. And I refuse to forge.

* WDKY24 - I write more of it last night, and I only have bits and pieces to go, but this is looking to be another difficult chapter. I'd also like to get beta volunteers NOW, so that I don't have to worry about scrambling to find them once I'm actually finished. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

* WikiFic - The Ultimate Yu-Gi-Oh Encyclopedia is slowly but surely being updated. I managed to get through linking the Shipper's List F-M, but there are still tons of pages that need to be created. I'm also trying to get as many pictures as I can, but I'd like people to tell me which ones would be relevant for the pages in question. What information is necessary? I'm also translating pieces of the Gospel of Truth for WikiFic. More members!

* Get my Tokiwa application finished - I need to estimate some dates, or else ask Mom. Then I need to go to the photo place on campus and get a few photos taken, passport-size.

* Blah blah, websites. - I need a new name for what was formerly Animanga Collision. The site will be another eFiction archive, housing all my fics, rants, essays, etc. from every fandom EXCEPT the Azureshipping Yu-Gi-Oh stuff (which will remain on Dragonfayth, just for the sake of things). But what to call it?

* Can't win, will duel - Okay, so I'm no deck-construction maven or anything, but I still play JTP Online even though I can't seem to win any duels. o_o At least in this, I don't have a level to intimidate me into backing off completely, and for the most part, everyone still seems pretty polite even when I lose miserably. I've seen some great combos, and I want to write them down for future reference. A lot of great duelists post combos and strategies on [ profile] yu_gi_oh; they could find a good home on WikiFic or elsewhere (with permission, of course). Few actual Yu-Gi-Oh fics actually make use of duels! I think maybe I should ask for more advice in constructing a deck that works... though from what I've seen a good Exodia deck is pretty damn good. Joey himself pounded me with one (HEY! He shouldn't have Exodia!) even when I had over 10,000 LP!

Er... yeah. I'm done for now. :)
azurite: (what the shit is this!?)
zOMG. Crazy-ass idea.

Sailormoon: Pharaoh 90
Yu-Gi-Oh: Pharaoh Atemu.

Come on.

It's just asking to be fic'd. Somebody. Something. I need to make this idea more coherent. But damn. Why didn't I see it before?

Oh, and in case you missed my earlier voice post, here's a run-through of what's what... )

Anybody subscribed to my FFnet alerts will now know that I have written my first-ever Harry Potter fic; it was for the [ profile] dmhgficexchange, and is titled "Secret of the Shrieking Shack." If the community name wasn't a dead-giveaway, it's a Draco/Hermione fic, but there's very little actual romance between them; more like snark and action. :) Go read it and tell me what you think of my first foray into HP-ficdom. I should probably post it at FictionAlley, [ profile] dramione, and MMorg while I'm at it. o_o

Heh, [ profile] mmagnet_ff, "cinemanga" sounds like cinnamon-flavored manga. o_o

HEY! So who wants to help beta WDKY23? I might as well just ask for chapter-by-chapter commitment, instead of general WDKY editors. I'm especially open to people who want to exchange one thing for another; that is, I'll beta for you if you beta for me. If you're stuck with an idea, want a grammar Nazi to clean up your narrative, or just want someone to bounce ideas off of, I'm your girl! I'm open to the usual fandoms, but my squick is slash-- I don't do it. So feel free to let me know. :)

I've worked a bit more on my [ profile] iconfiend100 claim for Seto x Anzu, and so far, I have 14/100 done. It's a pathetic amount, considering how long I've had the claim, but I went for a very long while with NO iconspiration. Lately, it's been fic, fic, all the time, and even now, that's hard, because I don't want to disappoint with Ch. 24. I might be a bit overeager to get to 25+ (for reasons that must remain confidential), but I still want to make WDKY as a whole the best fic it can be.

Back to the icons... I'll work on some more as I get inspired and find source art (be it anime, manga, or fanart). I've got 49 ACs left, and the following themes: forgiveness (I wanted to find an image of Seto from the Battle City/Noa's World arc, when he's on his knees in front of Anzu. Anyone have said image?), soft (Romeo & Juliet, much?), loneliness, working, abandoned, hug, smile (Myco's song?), tears, sunshine (Mamono, how'd you do that effect on my WDKY icon, anyway?), innocence, so far away, stars (DMG!Anzu? But how would Seto work into that?), in the moonlight, tickle, sweet dreams, blue, honorable, walls, happiness, food, over the rainbow (the song, duh), sugar + spice, holiday, beginner's luck, forgotten, misery loves company (that Kysra art of drill sergeant!Seto making Téa do pushups...?), candy, present, starving, joy, heaven, 31 flavors, silk, keeping a secret, open doors, lace, forever and a day. Any input is appreciated!
azurite: (atemu's determined)
Okay, I'm not sure who to blame for this one-- Vince for bringing me to Bob's party, Marc for playing against me first, Jimbo, or Christal. Regardless, I bought Katamari Damacy the day before I left for San Diego-- with my GameStop bucks, it was just a little over $12-- quite a sweet deal, if you ask me! But of course, I'm addicted.

And I'm still stuck on Make A Star 4, which is the same level I played to and got stuck on before. I've ranged from the low 50s to 99.8cm-- so blasted close! But alas, I just can't make it up to that 1m mark! ;_; How irritating! I did manage to work up a sort of stratagem: get the caramels, dice, and pins first, then the mah-johng tiles. Follow up with the batteries and then the erasers, and roll off the table to get the parsley, Lego blocks, round batteries, and mice. Get big enough to pick up Mandarin peels, shogi tiles, and the mini-Pylons. When all the small stuff from the living area is stuck, grab the books separating the main room from the porch, and grab the watermelons, the soda cans, and the flowers. Head around the side of the house underground; grab a few spiders, some rats and mice, and the little Jumbomen. Head up into the kitchen/bathroom area, and try to roll up to the counter to get the present. Move onto the boy's room and grab some toys, and then drop out the balcony to the garden. Grab the microphones and fireworks, and see if you can grab some potted plants and buckets. Try and roll up to street-level, and start grabbing balls, cats, briefcases... and then I always run out of time. Sometimes if I can manage, I wander around in the garden to grab cucumbers, rulers, birds, and more cats...

My policy at the moment is to spend 10 minutes (the time you're given to make the 1m Katamari) reviewing [ profile] fourhouseunion applications, WDKY22, and then go back to Katamari. o_o

Beat it! And I made Cygnus too, although I had too many ducks.

Something that's been on my mind about Scott. )

It has occurred to me that anyone that could possibly tell Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa about their mother (Padmé Amidala) is dead. The list:
* The Jedi (massacred by the clones & Anakin)
* Obi-Wan ("died" at Darth Vader's hand)
* Yoda (died before he really told anything to Luke outside of his Jedi training)
* Bail Organa (died in the explosion of Alderaan)
* Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader (duh.)
* The Emperor/Chancellor Palpatine (duh 2.0)

Who else was there that DIDN'T get killed in RotS? I would cite Jar-Jar, but who the heck knows where in the galaxy he might be? And even if there was someone else --such as the new Queen, or another Senator from Naboo-- how would said person know/seek out Luke and Leia, and why would the two of them believe whatever s/he/it had to say? How would the connection to Naboo even be made?

Fact is, I just started thinking of this out of the blue, because I think a "Luke and Leia find out about their mother" fic would be rockin'. But I'm terrified of looking into the Star Wars fandom for a fic that fits this profile, and I sure as hell won't start another fic. But hey, if there are fans out there, I'm open to recs.

Oh, and Blue Eyes and Apricots is up. I mentioned that in my mailing list, but I thought I'd give it a shout out here, too. All new content, new layout, new affiliates, and more. I'm still waiting on Garfour's response for the art, TAFL's response for the fanlisting's "official" status, and any new affiliates.

Finally, KYSRA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The scanner shipped today. :)
azurite: (In the name of friendship ass kick!)
Okay, so I'm back from San Diego, and despite Scott being sick for the first few days, me getting drunk after only 2 Smirnoff Ices (did you listen to my voice post?), and several attacks from the overly enthusiastic chocolate Labrador bitch Lando, it was a good trip. I went shopping with Scott at Fashion Valley today, and though I was not only on a budget but a time limit, I picked up an all-new outfit-- a kelly green zip-up sweater jacket (only $5 from MACY'S! WAY TO SHOP!!!) and a new pair of jeans. (I swore the brand name was L'arc en Ciel, but I just read wrong. Ehehe.) Truthfully, I spent most of my money over the past few days on food-- we ate at the famous Jewish delicatessen D.Z. Akin's, plus I had my first breakfast burrito at El Zarapa's not too far from where Scott and the guys live.

I also got some very nice Christmas gifts from Scott-- a 2006 Calendar "Cats of the Greek Isles" and a beautiful Asian fan with a woman playing a harp on it. ^^ Yes, I collect fans. I'm weird, you don't have to tell me.

A recap of my gifts this season, many thanks and squidges to all~ Mer got the stash! )

Attention Guardian Kysra! Look here! Look here NOW!

A big announcement for you, [ profile] guardian_kysra! Thanks to the generosity, kindness, cheer, and all the other happy holiday spirit emotions (either that or the insane fangirl desperation to see you post more stuff soon *cough*) of [ profile] cutieme4u, [ profile] janimelee, Samantha Stone (LJ Username unknown!), myself, and the well-wishes and encouragement of countless others, we have bought you THE SCANNER! ^^ It's coming from (since they don't charge for shipping!) and will include a cute message that reads a heck of a lot similar to this one. Sorry it's not gift wrapped, but I'm sure you'll have fun tearing open the box and throwing the packing pellets (or bubble wrap, whichever you prefer) just the same. Expect it to arrive within 5-9 days!

Thank you to everyone who sent their wishes, encouragement, and what little money they could during this holiday season-- I hope that despite the havoc Katrina and Rita wrought on our dear friend and resident Hentai Goddess (and amazing artist), 2006 will turn out to be a bigger, better, and brighter year for her than ever before!


As for me, I'm quite pleased right now, and unless prompted in some size, shape, or fashion, I have nothing else to say.

Happy Holidays and Have A Safe, Happy, and Wonderful New Years, Everybody!
(Thank you for being my friends. ^^ It means a lot.)
azurite: (it's all coming back to me)
Ugh. I was going to suggest to anyone with DSL and some free time on their hands to grab Yu-Gi-Oh Online; it's fun, challenging, and an accurate rendition of the TCG. It's also very cheap and easy to learn compared with other PC/Online games these days, and all you need is the game itself (which comes with a Duel Pass) and a DSL or high speed 'Net connection.

...But I just got harassed in a duel. Admittedly, I didn't have to chat with the guy in the first place. But he asked "asl" and I honestly replied: 20/f/USA. He said he was 21/m/ma, and I told him it was rare for older guys to be in the chat. And then he just decided to be a complete jerk and pervert and waste my time. He asked me where in the USA I was from, what I looked like, what my measurements were... yuck! I was there to duel, not to meet people! I could have mentioned I have a boyfriend, but that excuse doesn't fly with online pervs anymore; they just are like "I wanna chat wit u!" And he did say that, BTW. I told him I didn't have AIM or YIM, and after I beat his ass into the ground with a Summoned Skull (and then added him to my Ignore List), I reported him to Konami.

And I told the truth. I don't have AIM or YIM... I have Trillian! :P Bwahah. But all the same, I won't stop dueling. I need to buy (or get) a new Duel Pass soon ($14.99 for 150 Duels; basically 10 cents per duel). I would like to pre-arrange some duels with people I actually know and like... hopefully Mamono will get DSL at the end of the year, and I can send her the game and buy her a Duel Pass and we can duel the right way! :O!

Erin, Shaina, and their boyfriends, Elliot and Sam (respectively) all came to visit yesterday... I toured Shaina and Sam around CSUN, but since most of the campus was closed, we didn't get to see much. Shaina's thinking about coming to CSUN after she graduates from UCSC, because she wants to get her teaching credential (and be closer to Baba and Grandpa). Scott came over as well (we were planning to spend some time together as "the last week we'll probably see each other in a long, long time"), and we went to Islands over in Porter Ranch for dinner. T'was good (had a quesadilla). We also swung by Toys R' Us... I want the new DDR Extreme 2 (or Karaoke Revolution!) and... I was so tempted to buy some Duel Monsters/Yu-Gi-Oh TCG cards, but all they had was the Christmas packs, the Fire/Water boosters (forgot their appropriate names... Blaze-something and Something-from the Deep) and the new Cybernetic Revolution/Elemental Energy packs. Me? I want Dragon's Roar! :P Even if I have no one to duel against, so it's pointless. I don't need them.

Drama drama drama. )

On Dragonfayth again, would people be interested in me adding a profile pic mod? The pics would have to be hosted elsewhere (Photobucket, LJ, your own website) unless we restricted them to LJ-sized. Or is it not worth it, because we only have 6 members at the moment, and I'm the only author (you have to post a fic to be an author)?

...Yeah, anyway. I'm not in the mood for writing right now, but maybe I'll go outside for a bit and then watch some of Arabian Nights.
azurite: (yuna wasted)
zOMG Happy Birthday [ profile] kitesareevil, [ profile] sleep_alone, and [ profile] ohsupervinchan!

Sorry for the belated wishes, Grace + 'Niichan!

WHEW! I've uploaded *all* of my SxA stories (except the ones that I mentioned need revisions, and the ones I have not released/formatted yet) to Dragonfayth :: The Premiere Seto Kaiba x Anzu Mazaki Fanfiction Archive. Get going! Spread the word! Join the site, submit your own fics! *puppy eyes* Please? There's also a Christmas Challenge there, so if you need a kick of inspiration, check it out!

I'm also satisfied with the edits and additions I've made to WDKY22, so I'm going to post this semi-revised version up at Betasquad as we speak... please, any willing editors/pre-readers, etc. check it out (it's actually just a link, because apparently phpBB can't handle a 96K chapter. Yes, it's that long)! [ profile] luvinaoshi and [ profile] an_ardent_rain! (I doubt either of them will look here, but if they do... *crosses fingers*)

More Dragonfayth mods?
Well, I'd like to get a characters page up, even though I assume that everyone posting will be familiar with the main cast and characters of Yu-Gi-Oh! Nonetheless, not everyone knows who Miho is, or that Kaiba was once minty-fresh in the Toei animation. Plus I'd like to shed some light on the lesser-known characters, or characters I may not have included on the original list. Please check the list out and point out anyone I'm missing, okay? I'm still contemplating whether or not to include the Yami no... characters, though. If you want to give me good reasons, go right ahead! I'm all ears.

What else? I'm re-reading [ profile] mischiefmagnet's "The Night Before" for the fourth time. ^^ It's such a fantastic fic, and I sincerely hope she updates it soon (and posts it to DRFA! /plug)

And... well, it's almost time to go "home" to San Francisco. Eva and I will probably be leaving on the 17th or 18th, so MAYBE I'll be able to catch some of JTAF. Still, I don't think there's any way that I'll run into that girl I was emailing (apparently a fan of mine who's coming down to SF from Piedmont for JTAF. Hey, [ profile] staplerx and [ profile] god_101, if anyone mentions "psychotic fanfiction writer" or "Mer" or some derivative thereof, could you take a message for me? ^_~), because she's only going to be there on the 17th...

On top of that, today was the last day for Creative Writing class. I can't say I learned SOOO MUCH and it was a life-changing experience, but it was a lesson in writing and finding skills I didn't know I have. My weakness is that I can't shut up (as people are so fond of pointing out when I post particularly long entries or fics), and I couldn't shorten my fiction submission, "Goodbye, Hello, Who Are You?" (a DDR fanfiction, if you want me to be honest). But I met a lot of fun people, and I hope I stay in touch with them while I'm at CSUN.

...And then there's Scott. He's graduating and moving back to San Diego. Sure, it's not Japan or some other foreign country, but it's 150 miles away or so, 2 hours by car, and 4 hours by train. And if this stupid fear of driving (and lack of ability to practice with anyone) keeps holding me back, when would I get to see him? I hate feeling dependent on anyone, especially Scott, who I feel has done so much for me. I know he might come up to make visits and so forth... not just to see me, but to see Brett and Derek and everything, but... <_< Well, it wouldn't be the same, I don't think. We don't really have a relationship. I've called him my boyfriend to people who have asked, just because it'd be too awkward to explain the details. Except for today, when, at my last hand therapy appointment, one of the therapists asked "So, is he your boyfriend or your friend?" and I said (evasively, but with a dopey grin on my face) "aaah, a little bit of column A, a little bit of column B..." (this was when Scott was not in the room, obviously). I've been crying and worrying a lot lately. There was a lot of stress yesterday when Baba and Grandpa went to the doctor's unexpectedly at 9am, right as I was waking up. They didn't come back by 9:30am, so I walked to school. My VComm class was canceled that day, so I called the house to tell Baba, or maybe ask for a ride home. No one answered. I freaked out. I called again as I started to leave campus, 15 minutes later... still nothing. I walked home, paranoid the whole half hour that something had happened, and I had no way of getting ahold of anyone to find out if they were okay. I have to be honest-- it's not all roses and sweets here. Yes, I have it good, living with my grandparents off campus, not having to worry about rent or utilities or food. It's nice having people who somewhat understand me and CARE, plus... they're amusing! I have so much of what I want, and everything that I need. But I'm also placed in an awkward position of responsibility, to look after a pair of elderly people that don't seem to really need my help (at least for anything beyond carrying water in from the trunk of the car). Nonetheless, if something were to happen to them, what would I do? I don't mean if Grandpa had a heart attack-- I know CPR, I know how to react in an emergency. I'm not sure whether or not I would be scared/nervous and gung-ho, but I could handle it. But if either one of them died, what would happen to whoever was left... and me? I don't want to think about either of them dying, even if it is one of life's great inevitabilities. But... I talked to my mom, and she's right, I do have to talk to them. What do I do in case of an emergency or a tragedy? Who do I call? If something HAS happened to them, what can I do? I can't always rely on Scott to come over. I don't need to be taken care of, exactly, but I don't want to be going off the wall with worry and being upset all by myself. Anyway, with all this that I've got on my mind (a final due on Monday; no classes; 3 finals on Wednesday, only 2 of which actually merit intense studying; money issues, etc.) I think I better take my chance now and go to sleep... I do have class in 7 hours. *sigh*
azurite: (deadlines whoosh)
*points frantically up at subject line* WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Well, sort of. I sent in a fanart of Nana Osaki (from the hit Ai Yazawa manga "Nana") to Shoujo Beat a few months ago, in the hopes of winning a contest. I don't think I won, but my art got published in the December issue of SB anyhow! I'm quite happy! ^_^ You can see the online version at DeviantArt.

Since it seems more often that not that a music buff resides on my FL, I'm going to ask yet another "What is this song from?" question: What is the name of the classical-sounding song used in the new Kodak commercials? These are the commercials you see both on TV and at the movies, where a docent leads a bunch of kids around a photography museum. He tells them to listen-- listen. They can't hear anything, so he says, listen to the pictures: they are saying, keep me, protect me, share me-- and I will live forever. Then this very touching crescendo of classical music starts up, and it really is enough to move you to tears. Alas, I don't think I can't find it through Google, maybe because I don't possess l33t keyword skills. Anyone know? (I have heard that it might be an original score composed by the folks in Santa Monica known as "Ear to Ear". I didn't find that particular commercial for Kodak on their website, so if anyone knows if they release their tracks or whatever, let me know!)

I've also discovered that I am a walking contradiction. I went for a driving lesson with Scott on Saturday, and he was obviously hoping I would be more confident and motivated about it. Truth was, I was hoping it would rain so we wouldn't have to do it. No one seems to understand that despite really wanting and needing to learn to drive, it scares the shit out of me. I'm serious. I put driving on the same level as spiders. I think I can get behind the wheel and do through the motions if I need to; same as if I see a spider I can kill it instead of screaming. But I don't like doing it, it makes me feel icky, and I often have nightmares about it after the fact.

And Scott said he wants me to have more confidence-- not just with driving, but with all that I do. And so I'm talking to [ profile] shockman tonight, trying to give HIM a pep talk, and I end up thinking "Why is it so easy for me to give advice and try and help others to be confident, but I can't be confident myself?" Being in the car with Scott really stressed me out, to the point where I did cry (when he wasn't in the car). I had this big goal to have my license before New Year's, and I really don't see that as happening. I know I need to practice more, but I can't always rely on Scott; he'll be gone before the end of the month, and Baba and Grandpa will probably not let me touch their car. And to save up for a car of my own would be totally time-consuming, and is NOT one of the things I want to think about right now. I'd rather worry about getting into Study Abroad and paying for that!

Anyway, I've been in a holiday mood today... which is nice. I think I'll replace some of my older 100 icons with some of my own, made with fanart by Lin Kuruzu (pnayshoujo69 on DeviantArt) and touched up to be wintery. The question is, what is wintery? Ice? Snow? Peppermints? Glittery lights? Help me out here! I have a few fics overdue for [ profile] ygo_lyricwheel and for [ profile] yuugiouxmasfic. But I have to work on my submission for Creative Writing, because my group is way behind, and I have 20 some-odd pages to condense down. The story ("Goodbye, Hello, Who Are You?") still won't be finished, but it will be a better, polished version that takes into account everyone's notes and such. So I have to get to that now. Since I was absent on Thursday, I might have to memorize some Japanese, but also do some reading and writing.

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we've never spoken) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me.

It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.

When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.

Any updates and stuff that I do between now and later will be posted... well, later.
azurite: (Anzu's Future)
Well, it was a generally good Thanksgiving. Good food (yum, cranberries! And latkes!), the usual emotional drama... and I've discovered that my cousins actually are human, and do experience hardship at times. I've always sort of idolized them due to how RICH they are (or seemed), and I thought they were blissfully ignorant immune to the kinds of things I've been through. Admittedly, everyone still has their share of problems, so I'd say I'm pretty grateful for how my life is right now: not all that exciting. It can be a good thing at times, as I'm sure many people will attest.

I did have the requisite emotional breakdown, but that's only because my period happened to fall on the same day as Thanksgiving, so I have Basketcase Excuse Alpha-01. :P Nyah! The cousins are still calling Scott "Scott Peterson" though, which bugs the hell out of me. It'd be one thing if the name were that of a celebrity or whatever, but a murderer? Ugh... not very nice.

As for shopping, my sole Hanukkah present (from Baba and my Dad: $80 total) was mostly spent on books (FY: Genbu Kaiden #1, YGO Duelist 9, 10, 11, Socrates in Love) . The Fashion Valley mall is home to a Saks, a Neiman Marcus, Coach, Tiffany's, and all those other stores I feel uncomfortable just setting FOOT in. I hated shopping there because I didn't feel right in ANY of the stores. And to shop on Black Friday is a bad idea anyway, even if (because?)  everyone else is doing it. I did see Scott's brother Ryan at Coach, and his Mom at Ann Taylor, so that was nice... even if I felt out of place in those stores. The cheapest thing at Coach was a sparkly iPod mini case for $68! As for Ann Taylor... well, much as I love their clothes, I couldn't even bring myself to look.

Oh, did I mention I got my hair dyed (one color: chocolate brown) and cut (a layered cut down to my shoulders), and my eyebrows plucked? Yes, so I'm teh mature and girly looking, now. I don't act like it all the time though... I seriously need to stop thinking so much, be more social, and not act like a cat. ;_; ANYWAY!

Mostly, what I want for the holidays:
* To be with my friends
* To spend some time with mom
* To stuff my face with good food (spritz cookies! yams! hot cocoa with marshmallows!)
* BOOKS! Or Borders gift certificates...
* A cashmere sweater and scarf (Target has some for only $40/sweater, and... much cheaper for the scarf. Can't remember how much, but teh yum!)

I should be getting my first Xmas-present-to-self soon: my Shonen Jump/Jan 2006 with the Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon! No, I don't have anyone to play, but maybe I should change that. Sure, socializing with 10 year old boys isn't my idea of  making friends, but there's bound to be the odd female duelist, duelist-who's-also-an-anime-fan, or an older duelist-with-a-brain that I can meet... somewhere, somehow. And learning to drive might help me go further to hobby stores or sneak previews.

Speaking of anime and manga, I finally got my first issue of Takuhai... er, "MANGA" magazine. Tokyopop has slowly been slipping off my radar, what with how they're releasing mostly obscure titles/artists at a slow pace. And this magazine causes me to think: just what is "manga", anyway? I really don't like the idea of non-Japanese people trying to mock their favorite manga-ka's style, inventing their own style, messing around in Photoshop, and calling the end result "manga." And God forbid the word "Ani-manga" spread beyond the borders of our not-so-fair nation. I highly respect people that can draw so well as to garner Tokyopop's attention, but it shouldn't be touted as manga when it's far from professional. There are spelling errors, shoddy sound effects, and much less detail than real manga-kas-- even if the artists use screen tones, Deleter pens, and the works. I feel like I'm being prejudiced, but... well, "manga" is a Japanese word, a Japanese creation! You can't fake it! That would be like doujinshi-ka calling themselves manga-ka, when they know they're not! Even if American (or other nations) create their own stories in the Japanese manga style, I don't think it's manga...

Other stuff:
I'm participating in both the [ profile] dmhgficexchange and the [ profile] yuugiouxmasfic this Christmas; I have my assignments for both, but afaik, I don't have any submitting to do until December. That might be different for the YGO exchange, if only because there are themed "weeks" in which each week, a gift fic (according to the requester's "rules") should be submitted in line with the theme... I'm kind of confused on that, and whether I've missed the first week.

I've been emailing this person (Phyllis) who is an Azureshipper fan; I tried explaining to her that the "comics" she saw of Seto and Anzu were not official, that they were "doujinshi" or fan comics, and that the Yu-Gi-Oh series (anime and manga) has ended without ANY canon pairings whatsoever. And Phyllis acted like I'd told her there was no Santa Claus or something: she whined, bitched, complained, and insulted me. And she managed to do so while misspelling three words in a single sentence. I don't know if she's going to email me again, and frankly, I'd rather she didn't. I hate lame people like that...

Read our last exchange )

There's a code glitch in phpFanbase, which is what BEA is running on. I don't know if anyone else is using that script or its spinoff, phpClique, but if so, I'd recommend heading over to to keep up-to-date with the codes and fixes that Sasha and Co. put out.

And finally, this whole thing with Scott. I might as well just say what's been stressing me on and off...
I'm sure a guy loves knowing he's the cause of my zits. )
azurite: (Default)
Greetings from La Jolla, one of the most posh cities in Southern California. I'm typing this on my uncle Fred's Inspiron 5000e, and he just might hate this computer even more than I hate my Inspiron 6000. Heh... But on the bright side, if I feel like complaining to Dell about their decision to NOT let me return my computer (or exchange it) even though it was their fault that my 21-day return period expired because they LIED to me about 4 times about sending me a CD... So I think I'll try and do the Fry's thing and try and remake the laptop. Or, I can sell it on eBay. :P I mean, it comes loaded with new memory, Win XP Pro, Office 2003... I don't know how to erase everything, but if I was really determined to take that route, I could.

Also on the plus side, I get to sleep on this nifty bunk bed in a high ceilinged room here at Fred's house... er, condo/apartment/studio/loft, whatever the hell this place is. We're only a few blocks from these kitschy shopping areas with antique shops, back specialty stores, and needlework craft places, along with the ocean itself~! I hope I get to go to the beach!

Even better, Mom wired some money into my pathetically low bank account so I can pay my hospital bill-- you know, back from when I sliced my hand open? HMO thankfully paid for the bulk of the bill. For 6 hours of insane pain and waiting, it was over $1000, and all I have left to pay is $35. ^^

We just came back from this really nice Italian restaurant where I had a yummy butternut squash with cheese ravioli and parmesean sauce. Dad gave me some of his ribeye (mostly fat, though there was some delish meat attached) and brocolli; it was all delicious, and well worth the four hours we were waiting for my Aunt Joyce and Sally to come back from their shopping spree.

So despite all complaints and fears, so far, this Thanksgiving weekend is shaping up okay. I stayed at Scott's parents' yesterday; his Mom is still super-nice and wonderful as always, though the house is "falling apart" as they're getting ready to move to Texas. I was totally nervous about saying there; I don't know what Scott has said to them about me recently (if anything at all), but it's not like anyone gave me the Evil Ex-Girlfriend treatment, and... truthfully, why label whatever this relationship I have with Scott is, anyway?

I have a bit of comfort and security in knowing how he feels about me, and that he ISN'T using me like the Paranoid side of me thought. So, I'm happy, even if at times he makes me wanna strangle him with how dense he can be (how single-minded!), and the fact that he's leaving... if to San Diego and not Japan, which is a bit better. :)

I think I'll catch up on a few journals and some more WIRED before I turn in for the night. Happy Thanksgiving, anyone!
azurite: (fiction and reality)
Truthfully, I don't use my laptop much. As it turns out, I don't really need it. So I wasted over $1000 on something I don't need and pretty much can't use. Yes, it's nice having my own computer when relatives visit, or when I go to school and the Collaboratory comps are all being used, but it doesn't help me when I need to print, or other things. It was nice saying I had this cool piece of technology that was all my own, but... it doesn't work.

I've done a clean install about 3 times now. I've bought and downloaded the best of the best software, only to have it not work. I have tried calling three different customer support numbers, only to be told as I follow the menu options that the number I have reached is out-of-service. I have emailed the return form, only to have my order number (as it is listed on my account page) to be rejected. Remember when I kept calling Dell, and one week after the other, they said they'd send this CD to fix all my computer's ills? And then it turned out... they forgot to send it, they weren't authorized to send it, I had to call this department, and then I had to pay $250 for it!? WHAT. THE. FUCK!?

All that time I spent ended up "expiring" my 21-day return policy. What the hell is the point of having a 90-day warranty (expires in 12 days, shit shit shit) if the return policy doesn't last for the length of the warranty? Besides, in those 3 months, I've hardly used the damn thing, because I've spent so much time trying to FIX it! And now if I can't get ahold of Dell within the next two weeks, I don't know what I'll do. I hate calling tech support, but I hate thinking that I've spent $1300+ (that includes the leather case, the Windows XP Pro, the snap-on cover, and Office 2003 Pro) on a piece of shit. This happened with Dad and the Vaio-clone several years back, and that's still a piece of shit sitting in my closet back in SF.

I wonder if I can go to Fry's and assemble an all-new computer from the craptacular parts that Dell has... I mean, the CD+/-RW drive can't be bad, or the 40GB hard drive, right? And what about my 1GB Kingston Memory Card, and the rather nice monitor? I don't know, [ profile] god_101, you've put comps together from scratch, is it possible to do that?

...Needless to say, this whole idea of being pressured for time and not having any options is stressing me out a bit. A review of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire will come later. Right now, I'm exhausted... and by 7pm I have to be ready to go to King Tut. I still have to find time this weekend to do a smidgen of Japanese homework, BS at least part of my byline clip project, polish my study abroad essays and application(s), work on my VComm presentation for the 30th, AND work on Scott's birthday "present/card" for the 21st (MONDAY!!).

I feel like crying, but even my eyes are too tired.
azurite: (deadlines whoosh)
Okay... I'm kind of stuck. Remember those Asian-American Studies courses I mentioned-- AAS 210 (History of Asian Americans) and AAS 430 (Asian-American Pop Culture)? Well, I just came back from the Study Abroad informational session, and Hirota-sensei herself (aka department chair of the Japanese language program, one of my future professors, and a former department chair for the Study Abroad in Japan program) said that Asian-AMERICAN doesn't count for Study Abroad.

I remember there being two other courses-- HIST 400-something, but it was really late at night, and Hirota-sensei's class, which sounded cool, but maybe it was at a bad time, too. Well anyway, I might have to tweak my schedule to find out just what would work for Study Abroad, and HOPEFULLY get something to count for SOME GE/Minor/80-65 while I'm at it. Ah, alas! That AAS 430 class sounded cool!

It also turns out Hirota-sensei is willing to proofread my essays for Waseda and Tokiwa, so I think I'll touch those up and send them her way. Anyone else who's got a spare 20 minutes, I'd totally appreciate it if you could look them over! They're posted here in my LJ (tag: essays) and also in the [ profile] writer_girls comm.

Last night I helped Scott out on ANOTHER photo shoot, because his teacher wanted him to be more specific about his focus and lighting. It took us about an hour before he found "the right lighting" and by the time we actually finished, it was after 12:30am! Even In-N-Out was closed, but since we were both hungry (is this starting to sound familiar yet?) we ended up going to Denny's. ^^ Scott then stayed over (!) because he was too tired to go home. :) Ah, good times... er, sort of. I'll have to elaborate on that later, though.

Oh, and I checked the poll results from that Only 16 poll I posted-- you people answered strangely! An uneven amount of people said they didn't read it vs. what they thought of it... o_O What's up with that? And I suppose I can't be disappointed by anyone's answers, because I intentionally set it up with extremes for choices. I didn't want to make it too confusing. In any case, I'm sorta-kinda inspired to work on it again, so we'll see. Betas are awfully hard to come by these days, but as long as the SMRFF exists, so does ANDI!!!! :O BWEAHAHAH! *cough*

Well, since I didn't get to bed until super-late last night (er, this morning), I had to BS my way through my Japanese test (I think I did well, except I forgot the word for change -as in money- which is "otsuri"). I finished up a short essay on reality TV for VComm, and now I'm going to start Story #6 for JOUR 210, which is due today. ^^; Before I go to VComm class in an hour, I also have to finish reading Ch. 14 on Television and Video... it's pretty cool so far! Did you know that reality TV has been around as long as TV has? And that there are *14* different types of reality shows? Wow.

Anyway, time to try and make sense of all these numbers... how do you calculate a percentage increase, again?
azurite: (seto vs. seig WWII)
Okay, I just woke up from what was probably the second weirdest dream of my life. The thing is, I know I've had other dreams this weekend, but for some lucky reason, I woke up remembering this one.

Starring Eva, her roommates, a hot guy or two, and Pegasus from Yu-Gi-Oh! )

Yeah, so my weekend pretty much consisted of helping Scott with a photo shoot (being a model) for about 10-11 hours. I didn't go to anime club, and frankly, I DO NOT CARE. I have learned to navigate torrent sites and forums (and annoy people like [ profile] baine) for the latest info on good dramas, animes, and the like. Ergo, I don't have a NEED for anime club. I should have just known from the get-go that no one will ever replace the SFSU gang, and when they're gone and dissolved, they will still have the best spot in my heart, over any and all anime clubs, just because of the GOOD memories I had there. Yes, I had lousy ones too, but overall, it was so worth it. Those people and those times meant so much to me. :) And I'm looking forward to coming home in December and seeing all the guys at JTAF again. And maybe even a girl from my Japanese class, because she said something about going to SF/this "anime con" in December.

Back to my weekend, I also watched some movies, tried to babysit the dogs across the way (somehow they manged to get ahold of the older girl dog's food bowl when I put it upstairs for her; when I got back the next afternoon, the rim had been completely chewed apart), tried my first bottle of Smirnoff Raspberry (yum! But I didn't even get a buzz...), and generally had a nice time. I didn't get the chance to go to King Tut as planned, because Grandpa was taken to the hospital. He's better now, but the scare was enough to keep me and Scott at the house until they got back. So we'll go on the 18th at 9pm. Weird, but hey! Spooky mummy night. Maybe it'll help for future chapters of WDKY (you didn't just read that).

Anyway, the laptop's being a bitch again. Scott and I tried to install Adobe CS on it, and it kept restarting the InDesign/Acrobat Reader/other thing install. I got Photoshop to install, but it took forever to "load fonts" even though I'm pretty sure I don't have that many on my laptop. I decided to try and get all the updates I could from Microsoft Updates before trying to use Photoshop again, so I haven't touched it yet. Hem hem. Well, I know what to do if it goes floopy on me again (heh heh heh).

What's left? Japanese listening comprehension, hopefully getting paid for the dogs (even though I was so busy yesterday that I didn't scoop any poop, and they came back early today), writing a short skit, memorizing a new dialogue, practicing for a new response drill, and trying to remember all that crap from my evil Driver's Ed lesson (I'm going to have to repeat Level 1, because though the teacher was nice, she made me VERY nervous during the mock exam, and I made some VERY stupid mistakes). I don't want to keep stressing, so I have to meditate for sure tonight, try to clean up my room, and give myself a facial. Yes. A FACIAL. :P
azurite: (bad grammar. no cookie!)
Well, I had a great night's sleep. I went to bed much earlier than usual, and I slept straight through. I got dressed and ready pretty quick, and still had time to wolf down my breakfast and finish an analysis for Creative Writing class.

The weather's improved a bit; it's still wet outside, but at least it's not raining. I actually like this kind of weather, because it's not foggy enough to make my hair frizz, it's not cold enough to make me freeze, and it's not wet enough to get me soaked. It's also not windy, which is always a bonus. ^_^

Scott called last night and asked me if I could help him with a shoot tomorrow morning, which I'm more than glad to do on a free Friday. In the afternoon I have my first driver's ed lesson (I'm excited and scared), and then in the evening IF I FEEL LIKE IT, there's anime club. I have to do Japanese listening comprehension, write a short skit, and memorize a new dialogue all for Monday, because on Tuesday there's the JET Programme orientation in the USU during class time.

I'm zooming through GOF pretty fast, as I may have mentioned before, and it seems the eagerness to see the movie is spreading-- two girls in my Japanese class are pretty eager to see it, too! ^_^ I guess I better start making plans... though I'd love to see it in IMAX or at a big theatre (the ArcLight, maybe?), I'm leaning toward the cheaper and physically possible-- whichever of the PacTheatres in the area ends up having tickets for a midnight show. This assumes I don't go with Scott, because we might be able to go to a nicer theatre or to the PacTheatres in Sherman Oaks if he treats (I'd feel bad about it, but who am I to argue?).

Speaking of Scott though, he made this really weird suggestion last night. There was an ad in our campus paper about this "Campus Night Safety Walk", which Scott said he thought I'd be interested in. I took a look at the ad and wondered WHY in the seven hells he would have thought of me when looking at that. Hey, I'm never one to argue with free pizza and soda, but... come on? It's a night safety walk. It doesn't sound very exciting or even social. What is he trying to say here?

Meh, I think I'll catch up on some journals for the next hour or so before class.

Happy Birthday [ profile] cyperian! Sorry I can't do the rainbow-colored font thing, I'm not at home where the font colorizer is... ;_;
azurite: (pretear where are you?)
I went to Graumann's Chinese Theatre with Scott for the first time last night, and I saw Jarhead. It wasn't as great as I would have expected, but I liked it. And I'm obsessed with that song they use in the trailer, but I can't figure out who it's by! And it doesn't look like the soundtrack will come out until December. o_O

I liked the movie just because I sort of connected with so much of it. I feel stupid saying it, but ROTC really did mean a lot to me, even if I did end up quitting in the beginning of my junior year. But it was an adventure, and a memorable one at that. Even despite the yelling, the demerits, the stress, and the getting-rained-on during the Veteran's Day parade, I think it was worth it. I can still left flank, right flank, double to the rear, MARCH! with the best of them! ^_~ And it was fun seeing Camp Pendleton on the silver screen. Heh. Remember when we went there, [ profile] cutieme4u?

It was quite cool how Scott and I went on this "date" like adventure in Hollywood, and Scott was a total fluffball all night. ^_^ I like it, and I hope it doesn't mean he'll be an asshole this week (or at any time in the future). He also treated me to popcorn, a drink (which we shared), and a milkshake at In-N-Out once we got back to Northridge. Not being the type to throw a good night down the drain, I ended up staying over at his house. *wink wink* So all in all, a pleasant weekend that ended today on a good note.

I slept in as soon as I got home (around 11:30am), worked on some fanfic (WDKY22 is currently 62K, which bodes well for all of you that like your chapters looooong) and tinkered around with some homework... my magazine cover for VComm (underwent a new revision, needs some tweaking still, along with sample "articles"), my facilitator packet for Creative Writing (just have to read some critiques and grade them), and then 2 new analyses for CW. Tomorrow is just Japanese and Mythology; I remember the dialogues best when I read them in the morning, and I already posted a lengthy submission on Poseidon and Apollo for Mythology. :)

Did I mention that I passed my permit exam for Driver's Ed, and I scheduled my 6 hours of behind-the-wheel training for the weeks to come? I feel like a bit of a baby, being 20 and not having a license yet, but at least I'm on the way there! Whoo! I hope I do well and don't clam up and get scared when I actually have to take the test... and I wonder whose car I'll use? Both Dad and Scott have said they'll help me out between practice sessions with Driver's Ed Direct, though.

I'm also working on 3 pieces of fanart:
* Happy 2nd Anniversary, WDKY! (also the thank-you art for [ profile] winterwing3000, my 1000th reviewer, and the base for her SxA custom icon from me)
* The White Rose Gang/The Royal Azureshippers (me [The Fog Princess], [ profile] rhapsody_dragon [The Prophet of Mist], [ profile] guardian_kysra [The Hentai Goddess], [ profile] atlantian_magic [The Steam Queen], [ profile] geniusgirl [The Vapour Marquis], and [ profile] winterwing3000 [Needs A Name!])
* Special fanart for WDKY (My lips are sealed!)
azurite: (seto is checking out anzu)
LMAO... Just watch it.

Changed my layout again, because as much as I loved Cerulean's design, it wasn't compatible with Firefox, and it was driving me up the wall. So I saved her header image and icon, uploaded them, and am using them in the 3-column layout that I customized. I still can't get the mood icons to be in the right place though, and no matter what I do, I can't get the comment text (link) right. *sigh*

I still can't stop thinking about Scott. Maybe this is just an example of how my mind wanders, but focuses on one thing. And it probably doesn't help that I talk about thinking about him here, because in essence, that makes me think about talking about thinking about him. Ugh. He hasn't called, either. He called earlier when I was in class, but didn't leave a voicemail. I don't return calls if they don't leave voicemails, and I really don't want to be the one to call him (even though part of me wants to tell him explicitly NOT to use any picture of me in a damn show, as he did NOT ask my permission)... I don't know what I'd say, and anything I've thought of in my head inadvertently has me sound like I'm trying to guilt trip him.

But the truth is, I have been stressing out over him lately, breaking out even, and blacking out, too! What the hell's wrong with me, I wonder?

Tomorrow/Today is my big day, too... aside from all my classes, I have another hand therapy appointment followed by my written DMV test. I practiced again and got a 91%... so I think I'm doing okay. ^_^v

And you know what? I don't think I have too much to really stress over (boys don't count). Tonight, I was pretty confident in the Story #5 I turned in, I was EARLY to class (my leadership institute class got canceled/lost-- wah!), and I helped Esmeralda and another one of our classmates out-- they were so grateful, we drove to In-N-Out, TREATED me to a whole meal, and then gave me a ride back to school and dropped me off right in front of the USU. ^_^ It almost feels like we're friends. And... you know what? I'm not as scared anymore if Esmeralda wants to introduce me to her friend. She showed me a picture of him, and he's pretty cute! (If Eva can score with a hawt white guy, so can I!)

I'm also inspired for WDKY21 and 22 (and beyond), and am getting help from a wonderful, most unexpected source: [ profile] miss_matched! *tears up* Thank you...

*deep breath* Things are going to be okay. I'm gonna be fine.

January 2016

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