Boys boys, be my boys...
May. 27th, 2003 01:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
azuriteSnappy Answer #1
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to
check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the
ticket, and
he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she
said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."
Snappy Answer #2
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery
store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a
stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied,
"No ma'am, they're dead."
Snappy Answer #3
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for
speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day,"
the
cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way
without
a ticket.
Snappy Answer #4
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign
comes up that reads "low bridge ahead." Before he knows it the bridge
is
right
ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up
for
miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and
walks
around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got
stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge
and ran
out of gas."
Snappy Answer #5, THE TEACHER Snappy Answer OF THE YEAR
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final
exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here
tomorrow.
I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or
illness, or
a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!"
A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and
asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from
complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best
to
stifle
their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher
smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly
says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other
hand."
Now THOSE are what I call comebacks!
Ah, a day of school finally over. Turns out I didn't miss much on Friday, when I missed 1-3rd period. 1st period they voted on some awards for VAPA (I doubt I'll win; I know Alicia should get something), 2nd they got a crossword puzzle on taxation, and 3rd they went over some probability problems. Again, not much.
Today's gone by rather fast, but with 9 days left till Graduation (including this weekend, PROM!) things are getting overwhelming. A senior survey and a college center questionaire; a senior clearance sheet that can't be signed till after our finals, when all classes are passed and all books returned (thank god Thompson found my Pride and Prejudice book!). Tomorrow there's practice for the graduation singing starting in class and at lunch; it's either that or take the written final, you can see why I opt for the former. Besides, I've always wanted to sing at graduation... I mean, this time, I'll actually have been in choir while singing! (The last time I was singing because I'd *just* gotten into First Ladies when Vaaler was still teaching it)
The song is... well, you'll find out if you come to my graduation! You better come! (please?) It's June 5th at George Washington High school, starting in the bleachers at 2pm! It'll be hot and long though, so anyone that sticks around long enough I might just treat to a late lunch! ^.^v
Didn't do my Macbeth essay just yet, and now we have even MORE poems to go over. But Eva wants to come over to my house and finish up layout, but to do that we have to go to Journalism and upload the changes to the paper to my site... right? o_O So much webspace... and the DDREx OST download cut off last night (er, this morning) at 87%! I'll finish it when I get home... >_>
What else is there? Gotta go to J-town, get my Hinata 120% and work on that before Himiko has my head on a pole with Bishounen loincloths around it. She'd do that, too. Perverted, eh? Everyone's been telling me I'm too horny today, but hasn't it been that way a lot lately? (Is it BAAD? *flutters eyelashes seductively*) Haha, Colleen was SO uncomfortable. I love teasing people. Oh, and for the record, "Corinna has genuine cleavage." You know that Y shape everyone draws on chicks with "big boobs" in picrtures? But no one ever has those in real life? SHE DOES! it's kinda cool.
Luis went WAY out of his way (I think he extorted or blackmailed some people... he made it all sound so shady) to raise $150 for Colleen to get a dress and go to prom (her only excuse for not going) but she wouldn't take it! We tried everything-- guilt-tripping, reverse psychology... AUGH! The journalism grrl crew will be incomplete without her! We NEED her at prom! I should get her mom to nag her too. And find some stud-muffin to take her out (she's HAPA, short brown hair, glasses, retro clothing style with a modern rebel twist, very intelligent and speaks her own mind... any volunteers? Anyone? Anyone?) *snicker* Steph can't believe I just did that, but ah well... *grin grin*
Had fun shamelessly flirting with J.Po again today in Math. *shudder* I shudder because he said "You can join their [Dan Berliner and Jonathan Pang's] gum-scraping party." And *I* being the perpetual PERVERT, thought he said something else... as if you can't guess. Hints I gave J.Po, who didn't "get it" throughout the day: "What's a verb that SOUNDS like Gum, and can fill in the blank '____ Here!'?" -.-; he was grinning the whole time, even if he understood it, and he did agree that he didn't MIND (or didn't "hate") my shameless flirting with him. I have a sneaky plan for later in the year, graduation-ish, or the last day of this week when I see him. *smirk smirk* Ooh, it's so rich. But the beautiful details will be revealed LATER.
I love boys. =)
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to
check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the
ticket, and
he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she
said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."
Snappy Answer #2
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery
store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a
stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied,
"No ma'am, they're dead."
Snappy Answer #3
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for
speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day,"
the
cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way
without
a ticket.
Snappy Answer #4
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign
comes up that reads "low bridge ahead." Before he knows it the bridge
is
right
ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up
for
miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and
walks
around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got
stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge
and ran
out of gas."
Snappy Answer #5, THE TEACHER Snappy Answer OF THE YEAR
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final
exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here
tomorrow.
I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or
illness, or
a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!"
A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and
asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from
complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best
to
stifle
their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher
smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly
says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other
hand."
Now THOSE are what I call comebacks!
Ah, a day of school finally over. Turns out I didn't miss much on Friday, when I missed 1-3rd period. 1st period they voted on some awards for VAPA (I doubt I'll win; I know Alicia should get something), 2nd they got a crossword puzzle on taxation, and 3rd they went over some probability problems. Again, not much.
Today's gone by rather fast, but with 9 days left till Graduation (including this weekend, PROM!) things are getting overwhelming. A senior survey and a college center questionaire; a senior clearance sheet that can't be signed till after our finals, when all classes are passed and all books returned (thank god Thompson found my Pride and Prejudice book!). Tomorrow there's practice for the graduation singing starting in class and at lunch; it's either that or take the written final, you can see why I opt for the former. Besides, I've always wanted to sing at graduation... I mean, this time, I'll actually have been in choir while singing! (The last time I was singing because I'd *just* gotten into First Ladies when Vaaler was still teaching it)
The song is... well, you'll find out if you come to my graduation! You better come! (please?) It's June 5th at George Washington High school, starting in the bleachers at 2pm! It'll be hot and long though, so anyone that sticks around long enough I might just treat to a late lunch! ^.^v
Didn't do my Macbeth essay just yet, and now we have even MORE poems to go over. But Eva wants to come over to my house and finish up layout, but to do that we have to go to Journalism and upload the changes to the paper to my site... right? o_O So much webspace... and the DDREx OST download cut off last night (er, this morning) at 87%! I'll finish it when I get home... >_>
What else is there? Gotta go to J-town, get my Hinata 120% and work on that before Himiko has my head on a pole with Bishounen loincloths around it. She'd do that, too. Perverted, eh? Everyone's been telling me I'm too horny today, but hasn't it been that way a lot lately? (Is it BAAD? *flutters eyelashes seductively*) Haha, Colleen was SO uncomfortable. I love teasing people. Oh, and for the record, "Corinna has genuine cleavage." You know that Y shape everyone draws on chicks with "big boobs" in picrtures? But no one ever has those in real life? SHE DOES! it's kinda cool.
Luis went WAY out of his way (I think he extorted or blackmailed some people... he made it all sound so shady) to raise $150 for Colleen to get a dress and go to prom (her only excuse for not going) but she wouldn't take it! We tried everything-- guilt-tripping, reverse psychology... AUGH! The journalism grrl crew will be incomplete without her! We NEED her at prom! I should get her mom to nag her too. And find some stud-muffin to take her out (she's HAPA, short brown hair, glasses, retro clothing style with a modern rebel twist, very intelligent and speaks her own mind... any volunteers? Anyone? Anyone?) *snicker* Steph can't believe I just did that, but ah well... *grin grin*
Had fun shamelessly flirting with J.Po again today in Math. *shudder* I shudder because he said "You can join their [Dan Berliner and Jonathan Pang's] gum-scraping party." And *I* being the perpetual PERVERT, thought he said something else... as if you can't guess. Hints I gave J.Po, who didn't "get it" throughout the day: "What's a verb that SOUNDS like Gum, and can fill in the blank '____ Here!'?" -.-; he was grinning the whole time, even if he understood it, and he did agree that he didn't MIND (or didn't "hate") my shameless flirting with him. I have a sneaky plan for later in the year, graduation-ish, or the last day of this week when I see him. *smirk smirk* Ooh, it's so rich. But the beautiful details will be revealed LATER.
I love boys. =)
