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azuriteEven more review replies, taken directly from the page at FFnet. These review replies would have appeared in Chapter 13. I don't include the actual reviews FOR SOME OF THEM; go to FFnet or MMorg and look at the Review History if you want to see them. If people start reading the fic from the beginning and reviewing for the earlier chapters, I'll update this (and the other) chapter page(s) with replies to them as I see fit.
These replies are new!!
Also, new format for replying to LONG reviews-- I'll post my replies in PLAIN TEXT font, with no italicization or bolding. They'll appear between paragraphs of long reviews!
*growls* I was halfway through writing Review Replies for Chapter 11 when I realized I'd already done that --and posted them!-- before. I just didn't have them in my Memories. Sorry about that. Now the real replies I should have been working on...
Doma the Angel of Silence -- Azurite,
I'm shocked. That was actually short. I didn't think you could do short. But as always, you could write anything and I would rave about it.
Hey, does this mean that another update isn't far behind?
Ah, my updates never quite fit a schedule-- I'm sorry about that! But as for the length of the chapter, sometimes short is necessary. I've planned the whole story out... it's just a matter of how those plans translate to prose. If it doesn't require lots of words, why should I use a lot?
Isis-Nufu -- hey i'm new and i just LOVE your story. i feel it may be worthy of myt friends to read (they are really pickky about what they read). i would love to have you story emailed to me so i can print it...Damn town library computer doesn't have a printer and the school reads what we print off. So could you email it to me PLZ. (dad has blocked us from when he caught my sister). my email address is hazel001au@ Excellent story.
Hi there Isis-- I'm sorry to tell you this, but I can't email people copies of the story-- many people have already made that request and it's far too much for me to take on. However, you can go to my website and download the chapters from there. I don't recommend trying to print them, though-- the story is over 200 pages long, and we're not even halfway through yet!
By the way-- your domain for your email address got cut off. I couldn't have emailed you even if I wanted to.
Inu Kaiba -- Wow. Just Wow. This is one of the most wonderful stories I've ever read before.
The beginning hooked me Tea's parents dying...
At first I was all hooked on Tea bashing, thought she was a weak and stupid bitch. Now?
I respect her and although I don't go around saying Tea-Bashing sucks, you can't bash her, I don't approve of people bashing her. She is a strong indivdual, I know now.
I love your story, and I'm glad you took time to write it. I'm glad I took time to read it.
I'm very sorry I had you on Author Alert list, Favorite Author and Favorite Stories and you didn't know.
I wanted to wait until I finished the story to review, I'm not the kind of person who reads from the shadows and never reviews, except when reading a story with nearly 10,0 reviews.
I'm glad I stayed up later a nigth or two to read this, and I urge you to continue writing this as soon as possible.
-Inu Kaiba
P.S. This is my longest review so far, but you deserve it.
Wow-- I'm glad WDKY gave you a change of heart in regards to Téa. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion, I know, but I always thought Téa was a strong character, and I wanted to portray her as such. Hopefully I'm doing her character justice. I do appreciate the time you've spent reading and reviewing-- it encourages me to go on!
Thanks very much for including me on your Alert list-- hopefully if you're interested in my fics (Yu-Gi-Oh or other fandoms), you'd be willing to give them a read. Every bit of support and help counts!
Thank you so much! I hope you keep reading and reviewing!
Rin RavenIce -- Still lovin' this story. But hasn't Tea suffered enough yet? Here I thought that the story might be coming to a close and then that damned phone call. I'm the reckless type. I would have told Seto anyway. I'm proud of Mokuba though. The fact that he can put those feelings aside and call her Big Sister Tea again can be a hard thing to do. And now he wants to help her take down the Big Five...he's definately got some courage in there.
Haven't we all asked at one time or another "Isn't this enough?" True, this is a fanfiction, so I put Téa and the others through the ringer and back again, but by no means am I trying to turn this into an all-out circus. Suffering is also subjective-- the whole theme of the story, after all is "what doesn't kill you makes you strong eventually." Despite all she's going through, Téa's got to become strong, or else lose the "big fight."
Thanks for seeing Mokuba as the strong guy he is-- again, some people love him, some people hate him, but I think he's a very interesting, fun-to-work-with character. I hope I can bring him in again, with a larger, more impacting role.
Are you going to go back and focus on Mai and Joey for a bit? I feel like the rest of the gang has been lost in Tea's drama.
Also, Seto better say "I love you" by the end of the story or I'll ring his neck! Damned stubborn Kaiba...
I've also determined that I could beat Seto Kaiba in a Duel anyday! My deck is unstopable. He's not the only one who can control the Blue Eyes White Dragon.
I am going to focus on Mai and Joey here and there-- but they'll never outshine Seto and Téa. Still, keep your eyes peeled! As for Seto, you'll just have to wait and see for when he says what. ^_~ I'm quite the evil planner, I am...
As for dueling, a lot of people took issue with when Téa beat Kaiba in a duel. The thing was, I based that duel off one I played with him, in the PC game "Power of Chaos: Kaiba the Revenge." Sometimes the "Heart of the Cards" is with you, sometimes it isn't. But supposedly, Kaiba is the only one who can control the BEWD-- after all, he has the only 3 in the world. Unless someone gets a Monster Reborn on a dead one, uses a Change of Heart or Mind Control... well, you get the picture. People just don't like seeing Kaiba as too beatable. They forget Téa was actually considered a real contender-- but unlike Joey and Yugi, she didn't have a reason to enter the Duelist Kingdom tournament. Not to mention, if they'd made her duel accurate in the dub, people would probably respect her a lot more...
dragontamer101 -- The Big 5 finally makes their appearance. I wonder what Tea and Mokuba plan to do.
And Seto would probably end up finding out about it as well...
Well, I guess you do need all this drama in order to have over 30 chapters. 0_0
Yep, drama is the spice of life! The Big Five is probably one of the major subplots, so keep your eyes out for them!
winterwing3000 -- i would've, should've and could've reviewed this chapter on the yahoo group, but i was short on time, however, that didn't keep me from reading it! once more, i gotta say. you did it again Azurite! it's just so awesome! Seto's reaction is no biggie, since you mentioned that he 'was' different at home than at work/school/etc. and it is his duty to be protecting Mokuba, since the boy is his only family (if Tea wasn't in the picture).
One thing irks me very much though. how did the big 5 survive when Noa deleted them from the cyberworld and then it exploded? i highly doubt that they managed to save themselves onto a back up file before the whole cyberspace blew into oblivion...
Anywho, extra props to you and update soon? please?
I thought I mentioned that the Virtual World/Noah arc didn't happen in the WDKY universe. That arc was just filler in the anime, after all, and never happened at all in the manga-- though the Big Five did exist. So WDKY is a partial fusion of the anime and manga universe, using some elements from each. It starts out based wholly after the manga, with very few exceptions (unless I resolve them later on).
This explains not only why Noah and Gozaburo both existed as ghosts in WDKY (Chapter 9, primarily, though Noah did appear before that), and why The Big Five continue to be a threat.
DarkShadowFlame -- ::whistles:: Nice. I'm glad the Kaibas have made peace, and I'm just thrilled that Tea is going to go meet Crump- the guy who murdered her parents- all alone- probably without a gun or steak knife. (sarcasm sarcasm) She is far too impulsive.
Ah well, we knew you had to do something radical. Lots more chapters to go, after all! Yay. Let's just hope Tea doesn't take *another* beating. And, hm... what do you think Crump would have done if Tea hadn't answered the phone? Heh. Nice and neat, how that works out.
Mokuba is so adorable. (I can't give a review on a chapter like this without mentioning that!)
*grin* Oh, trust me, if I had the option, I would have had Téa go meet Crump with guns blazing, but considering they have her trapped between a rock and a hard place, it would have been more difficult to have her armed to the teeth. The best weapon she had was knowledge-- really, Mokuba's knowledge. That might just save her skin-- but besides all that, Téa's a resourceful girl. I'm sure she can make do with whatever she's got around her.
As for what Crump would have done if Téa hadn't answered the phone-- well, I have two possible answers to that:
(1) He's spying on Téa, so he KNEW she would pick up the phone
(2) He would have hung up on the person, and waited for Téa to be the only one home before he called.
Mokuba is adorable, isn't he? But he's like a cute ball of clay-- sometimes he's fun and easy to work with-- other times you'd like to cook him until he's fried. -_-;
Dragonic Soul -- Woah. Big torubles ahead.
Are you sure YOU wrote this cchapter, sempai? Cause it came really fast, and it's SHORT! Usually your chapters take me an hour to read! Is something wrong?
I sincerely hope that's a joke, because I don't take it lightly when someone accuses me of plagiarizing or ghostwriting. I write all of my own fics, and aside from corrections or suggestions from my betas, it's all original work. No one else has access to my account, anyhow. It was meant to be short, and it happened to be easy to write-- so it came out fast. That's all. Nothing is "wrong."
Shadowed Mediocrity -- I read this story when first it came out on your Yahoo! group. Tonight, I'm reading it again, and giving it a proper review.
The first impression that I got, actually, when I first read it was that I was rather disappointed. I'm not sure if you've been building up to this, and I simply haven't noticed, or if I was just particularly out of it that day, but I felt really disappointed in how you portrayed Seto. I remember wondering in the earlier chapters how you could have portrayed him so well.. but his softer side isn't exactly how I would have thought you'd write him. He's /all/ soft, as opposed to the edgy kindness that I thought might be more his style. I didn't really think that he was the type to construct one huge shield, and then crumple into kindness once you moved past it. (I imagined him to be more of the several thick shields kind of person. And even once you were past, there'd be speed bumps to keep you in check.) Even in the anime, he wasn't exactly obviously kind to Mokuba - he was a little snarky at times, to remind Mokuba of who he was, but that he loved his brother was never in doubt. Here, it's not in doubt either, but it's because he displays it blatantly.
Seto is an incredibly difficult guy to write, and I don't by any means proclaim myself an expert. But the whole point of the story, as I will reiterate time and time again, is about growth and change. In the past several chapters, he's had to think long, think hard, and change a great deal-- not necessarily drastically and all at once, but you have to consider who he's dealing with-- Téa, who he thinks he MIGHT be in love with, and Mokuba, his only brother. So in a sense, you're both right and wrong-- his defenses aren't down completely, but given the circumstances, they're lowered. I think it's understandable.
-shrugs- Anyway- that was what I needed to say before before I moved on to re-reading the actual chapter..
"Seto, she probably came off as intimidating.." -- Now this I have some trouble believing. Téa, intimidating? It might just be Mokuba's point of view.. but still! The idea strikes me as hilarious- she's intimidating only in her ruthless efficiency of her concept of friendship. Is that what you meant, or something else?
I personally think Téa can actually come off as intimidating. When Mokuba was describing her as such, it was under the circumstances that Mokuba knew her better than, say, people who had never really "met" her before. Hearing of someone is one thing, but actually knowing them is a whole other kettle of fish.
Specifically, I meant that she's a very open person-- she doesn't hide her feelings or dodge around the truth. She's straight-forward and honest- and that can be intimidating to some. Of course intimidation is a matter of perspective-- people might not be as intimidated by Seto as they would be by Téa, but that's because they both have different approaches to people.
As for Seto shortly before they get back- I didn't think that he'd trust so much to Yugi's promises. Not as thoroughly as I think you wrote him to. In fact, I'm not even sure that he trusts -Mokuba- that much.
But I need to do a lot of catching up anyway.
But the fact is-- he WOULD trust Yugi. After everything they've been through up till this point, it's not like they're friends-- but he can trust Yugi simply because of what Yugi stands for. He's not a lying, cheating person, and he's never done anything purely for selfish means. While they're still rivals, in times of need, Yugi is actually someone Kaiba can rely on-- if not to do the right thing, then to figure it out eventually. Given everything that's happened, why shouldn't he? After all, Yugi is the one that has "lost" in the grand scheme of things-- Seto has Téa, he has Mokuba... Yugi's trustworthy if only because he has nothing to hold over Seto.
I thought he'd be a little more reprimanding, too, what with how Mokuba just ran off. Seto depends a lot on his younger brother, and so, I imagined that he'd be sharper, would give Mokuba a lecture before succumbing to the inevitable urge to explain to him, in a kindly brotherly fashion (or at least, as kind as Kaiba gets. XD) how things are, and how things won't change.
And Kaiba? Suggesting no secrets from anyone, including himself? Wow. Téa's /really/ wrought a change in him.
Oh believe-you-me, there will be a skosh of reprimanding later on. While Seto doesn't strike me as a "slow-reaction" sort of individual (that seems to be more Joey's arena), he might be the kind to contemplate on something for a while, sort things out mentally before he takes action. There are a variety of situations that are brand new to him in this brief burst of time-- feelings for Téa, betrayal by someone he thought he had grown to trust, Mokuba running away... etc.
So Mokuba will have a "talk" with Seto.
With the secrets thing, obviously I didn't want to make it the "end all" of the fic, because in the end of this chapter alone, Mokuba and Téa broke that promise. Suffice it to say, it's a nil deal now. Seto has plenty of secrets he's already keeping from them; he can easily justify it by saying "No more CURRENT secrets." Otherwise they could all ask each other prying questions until they're blue in the face, and they'd have to answer them all... aside from the few compromising situations that would result, where's the fun in that?
"--Téa swallowed the bile building in her throat, reading a venom-laced threat to send back to Crump--"
Is reading really the word you want to use there? It doesn't make sense from how I'm reading it.. but.. -shrugs-
Overall, I liked the chapter, but not quite as much as I liked the other ones. I'm off to re-read, however, and wonder if the change in Seto was as abrupt as it seemed to me just now.
And what about those spoilers for Chapter 16 you promised? x(
The chapters are revised on a progressive basis-- thanks for catching that error. It's since been fixed. I do apologize if Seto's behavior seemed at all "choppy" or unwarranted, but I do try to have everything pan out before I get to any major points. As for the Chapter 16 spoilers-- like I said, they were on my profile! I'm sorry if you missed it... *grins*
Mamono -- *sneaks around* Heh, I'm at school. ^~ Going to get in trouble, but I had to review this('specially since I don't think I did last chapter... ;--;).
Just, you really show your evil in this chapter by giving us all the sweet stuff and then that ending... Just woah... That's going to get bumpy-- quick.
Beautiful descriptions this chapter, especially revolving around Seto and Mokuba... :D Really really love this chapter, and the fluff just killed me... ;D
It just goes to show some people think it's fluff/sweet/cute, and some people don't. Most people didn't like this chapter due to the shortness and partial (maybe?) OOC. Alas! But I do love being evil...
Svelte Rose -- Just when you think everything is alright, just when your heart finally goes - "Yes! Those two are finally okay!" - something else happens. Dammit Crump! I'll kill you, you *string of expletives* >_<
Not sure if FFnet cut off the rest of your review... FYI-- you can't use a close angle bracket (<), or else your review will abruptly be terminated.. But your review made me laugh nonetheless. Crump's just one of those guys I'm intentionally writing so you'll love to hate him.
wackoramaco87 -- well. that was an interesting chapter! i enjoyed the way you had mokuba and tea interact...it was just so sweet! =)
i wonder what will happen to the promise they all made...not to keep secrets from each other...
p.s. i couldn't find place in your website where you answer reviews. what topic is it under?
Ah yes, the promise-- as I said to another reader, it was obviously something they weren't ready to keep. The hope, then, is that they will grow to trust each other where they don't need "promises they don't intend to keep" in order to justify the secrets they have from each other.
The Review Replies are located here on my LiveJournal (obviously if you're reading this, you're reading them!). I'm going to stop hosting them at my website, and keep them here. The link back to the Memories section of my LiveJournal (look for the 'Review Replies' category) is on my FFnet profile.
These replies are new!!
Also, new format for replying to LONG reviews-- I'll post my replies in PLAIN TEXT font, with no italicization or bolding. They'll appear between paragraphs of long reviews!
*growls* I was halfway through writing Review Replies for Chapter 11 when I realized I'd already done that --and posted them!-- before. I just didn't have them in my Memories. Sorry about that. Now the real replies I should have been working on...
Doma the Angel of Silence -- Azurite,
I'm shocked. That was actually short. I didn't think you could do short. But as always, you could write anything and I would rave about it.
Hey, does this mean that another update isn't far behind?
Ah, my updates never quite fit a schedule-- I'm sorry about that! But as for the length of the chapter, sometimes short is necessary. I've planned the whole story out... it's just a matter of how those plans translate to prose. If it doesn't require lots of words, why should I use a lot?
Isis-Nufu -- hey i'm new and i just LOVE your story. i feel it may be worthy of myt friends to read (they are really pickky about what they read). i would love to have you story emailed to me so i can print it...Damn town library computer doesn't have a printer and the school reads what we print off. So could you email it to me PLZ. (dad has blocked us from when he caught my sister). my email address is hazel001au@ Excellent story.
Hi there Isis-- I'm sorry to tell you this, but I can't email people copies of the story-- many people have already made that request and it's far too much for me to take on. However, you can go to my website and download the chapters from there. I don't recommend trying to print them, though-- the story is over 200 pages long, and we're not even halfway through yet!
By the way-- your domain for your email address got cut off. I couldn't have emailed you even if I wanted to.
Inu Kaiba -- Wow. Just Wow. This is one of the most wonderful stories I've ever read before.
The beginning hooked me Tea's parents dying...
At first I was all hooked on Tea bashing, thought she was a weak and stupid bitch. Now?
I respect her and although I don't go around saying Tea-Bashing sucks, you can't bash her, I don't approve of people bashing her. She is a strong indivdual, I know now.
I love your story, and I'm glad you took time to write it. I'm glad I took time to read it.
I'm very sorry I had you on Author Alert list, Favorite Author and Favorite Stories and you didn't know.
I wanted to wait until I finished the story to review, I'm not the kind of person who reads from the shadows and never reviews, except when reading a story with nearly 10,0 reviews.
I'm glad I stayed up later a nigth or two to read this, and I urge you to continue writing this as soon as possible.
-Inu Kaiba
P.S. This is my longest review so far, but you deserve it.
Wow-- I'm glad WDKY gave you a change of heart in regards to Téa. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion, I know, but I always thought Téa was a strong character, and I wanted to portray her as such. Hopefully I'm doing her character justice. I do appreciate the time you've spent reading and reviewing-- it encourages me to go on!
Thanks very much for including me on your Alert list-- hopefully if you're interested in my fics (Yu-Gi-Oh or other fandoms), you'd be willing to give them a read. Every bit of support and help counts!
Thank you so much! I hope you keep reading and reviewing!
Rin RavenIce -- Still lovin' this story. But hasn't Tea suffered enough yet? Here I thought that the story might be coming to a close and then that damned phone call. I'm the reckless type. I would have told Seto anyway. I'm proud of Mokuba though. The fact that he can put those feelings aside and call her Big Sister Tea again can be a hard thing to do. And now he wants to help her take down the Big Five...he's definately got some courage in there.
Haven't we all asked at one time or another "Isn't this enough?" True, this is a fanfiction, so I put Téa and the others through the ringer and back again, but by no means am I trying to turn this into an all-out circus. Suffering is also subjective-- the whole theme of the story, after all is "what doesn't kill you makes you strong eventually." Despite all she's going through, Téa's got to become strong, or else lose the "big fight."
Thanks for seeing Mokuba as the strong guy he is-- again, some people love him, some people hate him, but I think he's a very interesting, fun-to-work-with character. I hope I can bring him in again, with a larger, more impacting role.
Are you going to go back and focus on Mai and Joey for a bit? I feel like the rest of the gang has been lost in Tea's drama.
Also, Seto better say "I love you" by the end of the story or I'll ring his neck! Damned stubborn Kaiba...
I've also determined that I could beat Seto Kaiba in a Duel anyday! My deck is unstopable. He's not the only one who can control the Blue Eyes White Dragon.
I am going to focus on Mai and Joey here and there-- but they'll never outshine Seto and Téa. Still, keep your eyes peeled! As for Seto, you'll just have to wait and see for when he says what. ^_~ I'm quite the evil planner, I am...
As for dueling, a lot of people took issue with when Téa beat Kaiba in a duel. The thing was, I based that duel off one I played with him, in the PC game "Power of Chaos: Kaiba the Revenge." Sometimes the "Heart of the Cards" is with you, sometimes it isn't. But supposedly, Kaiba is the only one who can control the BEWD-- after all, he has the only 3 in the world. Unless someone gets a Monster Reborn on a dead one, uses a Change of Heart or Mind Control... well, you get the picture. People just don't like seeing Kaiba as too beatable. They forget Téa was actually considered a real contender-- but unlike Joey and Yugi, she didn't have a reason to enter the Duelist Kingdom tournament. Not to mention, if they'd made her duel accurate in the dub, people would probably respect her a lot more...
dragontamer101 -- The Big 5 finally makes their appearance. I wonder what Tea and Mokuba plan to do.
And Seto would probably end up finding out about it as well...
Well, I guess you do need all this drama in order to have over 30 chapters. 0_0
Yep, drama is the spice of life! The Big Five is probably one of the major subplots, so keep your eyes out for them!
winterwing3000 -- i would've, should've and could've reviewed this chapter on the yahoo group, but i was short on time, however, that didn't keep me from reading it! once more, i gotta say. you did it again Azurite! it's just so awesome! Seto's reaction is no biggie, since you mentioned that he 'was' different at home than at work/school/etc. and it is his duty to be protecting Mokuba, since the boy is his only family (if Tea wasn't in the picture).
One thing irks me very much though. how did the big 5 survive when Noa deleted them from the cyberworld and then it exploded? i highly doubt that they managed to save themselves onto a back up file before the whole cyberspace blew into oblivion...
Anywho, extra props to you and update soon? please?
I thought I mentioned that the Virtual World/Noah arc didn't happen in the WDKY universe. That arc was just filler in the anime, after all, and never happened at all in the manga-- though the Big Five did exist. So WDKY is a partial fusion of the anime and manga universe, using some elements from each. It starts out based wholly after the manga, with very few exceptions (unless I resolve them later on).
This explains not only why Noah and Gozaburo both existed as ghosts in WDKY (Chapter 9, primarily, though Noah did appear before that), and why The Big Five continue to be a threat.
DarkShadowFlame -- ::whistles:: Nice. I'm glad the Kaibas have made peace, and I'm just thrilled that Tea is going to go meet Crump- the guy who murdered her parents- all alone- probably without a gun or steak knife. (sarcasm sarcasm) She is far too impulsive.
Ah well, we knew you had to do something radical. Lots more chapters to go, after all! Yay. Let's just hope Tea doesn't take *another* beating. And, hm... what do you think Crump would have done if Tea hadn't answered the phone? Heh. Nice and neat, how that works out.
Mokuba is so adorable. (I can't give a review on a chapter like this without mentioning that!)
*grin* Oh, trust me, if I had the option, I would have had Téa go meet Crump with guns blazing, but considering they have her trapped between a rock and a hard place, it would have been more difficult to have her armed to the teeth. The best weapon she had was knowledge-- really, Mokuba's knowledge. That might just save her skin-- but besides all that, Téa's a resourceful girl. I'm sure she can make do with whatever she's got around her.
As for what Crump would have done if Téa hadn't answered the phone-- well, I have two possible answers to that:
(1) He's spying on Téa, so he KNEW she would pick up the phone
(2) He would have hung up on the person, and waited for Téa to be the only one home before he called.
Mokuba is adorable, isn't he? But he's like a cute ball of clay-- sometimes he's fun and easy to work with-- other times you'd like to cook him until he's fried. -_-;
Dragonic Soul -- Woah. Big torubles ahead.
Are you sure YOU wrote this cchapter, sempai? Cause it came really fast, and it's SHORT! Usually your chapters take me an hour to read! Is something wrong?
I sincerely hope that's a joke, because I don't take it lightly when someone accuses me of plagiarizing or ghostwriting. I write all of my own fics, and aside from corrections or suggestions from my betas, it's all original work. No one else has access to my account, anyhow. It was meant to be short, and it happened to be easy to write-- so it came out fast. That's all. Nothing is "wrong."
Shadowed Mediocrity -- I read this story when first it came out on your Yahoo! group. Tonight, I'm reading it again, and giving it a proper review.
The first impression that I got, actually, when I first read it was that I was rather disappointed. I'm not sure if you've been building up to this, and I simply haven't noticed, or if I was just particularly out of it that day, but I felt really disappointed in how you portrayed Seto. I remember wondering in the earlier chapters how you could have portrayed him so well.. but his softer side isn't exactly how I would have thought you'd write him. He's /all/ soft, as opposed to the edgy kindness that I thought might be more his style. I didn't really think that he was the type to construct one huge shield, and then crumple into kindness once you moved past it. (I imagined him to be more of the several thick shields kind of person. And even once you were past, there'd be speed bumps to keep you in check.) Even in the anime, he wasn't exactly obviously kind to Mokuba - he was a little snarky at times, to remind Mokuba of who he was, but that he loved his brother was never in doubt. Here, it's not in doubt either, but it's because he displays it blatantly.
Seto is an incredibly difficult guy to write, and I don't by any means proclaim myself an expert. But the whole point of the story, as I will reiterate time and time again, is about growth and change. In the past several chapters, he's had to think long, think hard, and change a great deal-- not necessarily drastically and all at once, but you have to consider who he's dealing with-- Téa, who he thinks he MIGHT be in love with, and Mokuba, his only brother. So in a sense, you're both right and wrong-- his defenses aren't down completely, but given the circumstances, they're lowered. I think it's understandable.
-shrugs- Anyway- that was what I needed to say before before I moved on to re-reading the actual chapter..
"Seto, she probably came off as intimidating.." -- Now this I have some trouble believing. Téa, intimidating? It might just be Mokuba's point of view.. but still! The idea strikes me as hilarious- she's intimidating only in her ruthless efficiency of her concept of friendship. Is that what you meant, or something else?
I personally think Téa can actually come off as intimidating. When Mokuba was describing her as such, it was under the circumstances that Mokuba knew her better than, say, people who had never really "met" her before. Hearing of someone is one thing, but actually knowing them is a whole other kettle of fish.
Specifically, I meant that she's a very open person-- she doesn't hide her feelings or dodge around the truth. She's straight-forward and honest- and that can be intimidating to some. Of course intimidation is a matter of perspective-- people might not be as intimidated by Seto as they would be by Téa, but that's because they both have different approaches to people.
As for Seto shortly before they get back- I didn't think that he'd trust so much to Yugi's promises. Not as thoroughly as I think you wrote him to. In fact, I'm not even sure that he trusts -Mokuba- that much.
But I need to do a lot of catching up anyway.
But the fact is-- he WOULD trust Yugi. After everything they've been through up till this point, it's not like they're friends-- but he can trust Yugi simply because of what Yugi stands for. He's not a lying, cheating person, and he's never done anything purely for selfish means. While they're still rivals, in times of need, Yugi is actually someone Kaiba can rely on-- if not to do the right thing, then to figure it out eventually. Given everything that's happened, why shouldn't he? After all, Yugi is the one that has "lost" in the grand scheme of things-- Seto has Téa, he has Mokuba... Yugi's trustworthy if only because he has nothing to hold over Seto.
I thought he'd be a little more reprimanding, too, what with how Mokuba just ran off. Seto depends a lot on his younger brother, and so, I imagined that he'd be sharper, would give Mokuba a lecture before succumbing to the inevitable urge to explain to him, in a kindly brotherly fashion (or at least, as kind as Kaiba gets. XD) how things are, and how things won't change.
And Kaiba? Suggesting no secrets from anyone, including himself? Wow. Téa's /really/ wrought a change in him.
Oh believe-you-me, there will be a skosh of reprimanding later on. While Seto doesn't strike me as a "slow-reaction" sort of individual (that seems to be more Joey's arena), he might be the kind to contemplate on something for a while, sort things out mentally before he takes action. There are a variety of situations that are brand new to him in this brief burst of time-- feelings for Téa, betrayal by someone he thought he had grown to trust, Mokuba running away... etc.
So Mokuba will have a "talk" with Seto.
With the secrets thing, obviously I didn't want to make it the "end all" of the fic, because in the end of this chapter alone, Mokuba and Téa broke that promise. Suffice it to say, it's a nil deal now. Seto has plenty of secrets he's already keeping from them; he can easily justify it by saying "No more CURRENT secrets." Otherwise they could all ask each other prying questions until they're blue in the face, and they'd have to answer them all... aside from the few compromising situations that would result, where's the fun in that?
"--Téa swallowed the bile building in her throat, reading a venom-laced threat to send back to Crump--"
Is reading really the word you want to use there? It doesn't make sense from how I'm reading it.. but.. -shrugs-
Overall, I liked the chapter, but not quite as much as I liked the other ones. I'm off to re-read, however, and wonder if the change in Seto was as abrupt as it seemed to me just now.
And what about those spoilers for Chapter 16 you promised? x(
The chapters are revised on a progressive basis-- thanks for catching that error. It's since been fixed. I do apologize if Seto's behavior seemed at all "choppy" or unwarranted, but I do try to have everything pan out before I get to any major points. As for the Chapter 16 spoilers-- like I said, they were on my profile! I'm sorry if you missed it... *grins*
Mamono -- *sneaks around* Heh, I'm at school. ^~ Going to get in trouble, but I had to review this('specially since I don't think I did last chapter... ;--;).
Just, you really show your evil in this chapter by giving us all the sweet stuff and then that ending... Just woah... That's going to get bumpy-- quick.
Beautiful descriptions this chapter, especially revolving around Seto and Mokuba... :D Really really love this chapter, and the fluff just killed me... ;D
It just goes to show some people think it's fluff/sweet/cute, and some people don't. Most people didn't like this chapter due to the shortness and partial (maybe?) OOC. Alas! But I do love being evil...
Svelte Rose -- Just when you think everything is alright, just when your heart finally goes - "Yes! Those two are finally okay!" - something else happens. Dammit Crump! I'll kill you, you *string of expletives* >_<
Not sure if FFnet cut off the rest of your review... FYI-- you can't use a close angle bracket (<), or else your review will abruptly be terminated.. But your review made me laugh nonetheless. Crump's just one of those guys I'm intentionally writing so you'll love to hate him.
wackoramaco87 -- well. that was an interesting chapter! i enjoyed the way you had mokuba and tea interact...it was just so sweet! =)
i wonder what will happen to the promise they all made...not to keep secrets from each other...
p.s. i couldn't find place in your website where you answer reviews. what topic is it under?
Ah yes, the promise-- as I said to another reader, it was obviously something they weren't ready to keep. The hope, then, is that they will grow to trust each other where they don't need "promises they don't intend to keep" in order to justify the secrets they have from each other.
The Review Replies are located here on my LiveJournal (obviously if you're reading this, you're reading them!). I'm going to stop hosting them at my website, and keep them here. The link back to the Memories section of my LiveJournal (look for the 'Review Replies' category) is on my FFnet profile.
