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azuriteSeveral times today I've honestly wondered how humanity can ever survive when there is such a surplus of STUPID PEOPLE all around us. You know why they publish the "Darwin's Guide" that gives the names of people who "for the sake of evolution" somehow got themselves (accidentally) offed, therfore saving the rest of humanity from their genes? Because stupid people reproduce, creating more stupid people.
I was irritated on the bus on the way to school today-- to say the bus was packed would have been an understatement-- I was standing on the ledge just off the front door, and had it opened unexpectedly, I would have broken a leg. People filtered on and off, but some idiots refused to move back, even though there were seats to the left and right of them. Stupid girls with a single purse or shopping bag would block an old woman's way as she fumbled with a bag of groceries, trying to sit down. I hate people like that, and really want to tell them off. But no, it's not my place.
And you know what scares and disgusts me even more? Things like this. It strikes me as sad, pathetic, and god, how lucky I am to have live the life I have. No matter how much my mom pisses me off (or vice versa) she'd never be insane and idiotic enough to send me to Tranquility Bay. And THANK GODDESS for that! I feel so sorry for the hundreds of parents and kids that end up shipping $2000/month to send their kids to a "programme" like that. Ridiculous. But read it for yourself, and then we can both rant and rail about that together. I just have to say, I'm ecstatic that I don't live in Utah or Texas. Don't get me wrong, I have friends who live there, and they seem fine-- but I wouldn't want to be the kid of someone born and bred there their entire lives, someone who'd send me to a place like that if I "dressed inappropriately." I've been told I take things personal, but then I try to be myself and say what I feel, because "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seuss had something going on when he said that.
You should ALWAYS be yourself, and live life to the fullest, no matter what anyone else says. So likewise, while I can argue for hours on a subject, you can disagree with me, and that's okay, because if everyone agreed with everyone else, the world would be a very boring, drab place. So earlier in chat, Will was talking about how he didn't think he could go to Fanime 2K4, which is a shame. 4 Days, San Jose Convention Center, 2 Hotels, and supposed to be a hell of a lot more fun. Memorial Day weekend, when most families ship out one place or another. But Will was pretty insistent on being studious and "making the most of his senior year," which I commend him for. I know firsthand that when you slack off, it's a huge mistake. It's a lot of trials and tribulation to get up to your senior year, and you hear both sides of the argument-- one says that you shouldn't slack off senior year (which is very true) and the other that says you should enjoy every moment of it, and not get too caught up in everything (which is also true).
I was incredibly stressed most of my junior year. Depressed, suicidal, sick. Yes, my junior year sucked. I learned the lesson the hard way, as my 3.85 GPA plummetted to a 1.5. Never in my life had I ever gotten anything so low. I was ashamed. I hated the way people always seemed to TELL me "You're so smart, you can do this and this and that..." when all I wanted to do was tell them to shut up and let me go at my own pace. But maybe on some subliminal level, people telling me like that -pressuring me, even- got me thinking how much nicer it is to recieve compliments than sad stares and admonishings.
I've known people going to Lowell become suicidal and so involved in their study that they never have time for a social life. And that ruins you. If I hadn't met everyone from RTA when I did, I might have strayed down a Very Bad Path. So I guess you could say I was "saved" by some very good friends, even if they didn't know it. Senior year, I balanced doing what I loved (writing, journalism) with what I had to do (get better in math, make up Japanese). True, I didn't take my swim test, but then, I still have sciatica, a perfectly medical excuse. And one day I'll be able to swim like I used to, and maybe I'll be able to do those 6 laps and water treading without even thinking about it.
But life's too short for regrets. High school is supposed to be both the best and worst years of your life, and for me, that's damn true. I met some incredible people, did some fantastic things, had some rotten times, and had lots of break downs. I didn't throw myself totally into studying though-- it just made things harder. I'm not saying HS doesn't matter at all in your senior year, because it DOES, especially if you know what you want to do with your life afterwards (college, major, etc.). Lots of people these days want to go to college, get BAs, MAs, PHds. GOOD! Go for it! I can't encourage you enough! But there's also the sad side-- college is expensive. And plenty of colleges -private, government owned, or otherwise- have reputations that don't fit their educational curriculum.
Like the UC system. I personally hate it, but Katia's going to UC Berkley, Eva's going to UCLA, and Marcella's going to UC Santa Cruz. They friggin' RULE. I'm so proud of them. But me? No, the UC system is not for me, despite Mrs. Thompson's repeated attempts to get me to believe otherwise. I have friends like Cassie going to CCSF, and after having gone there for some time, I think it's a pretty good school-- but it's a challenge to actually take the classes you need/want, and then get OUT in 2 years. People get lazy, and don't do that anymore. Try getting your BA in four years, even at a State University. It might not happen, and that's the grim truth of things.
CA in particular has suffered extreme budget cuts and losses, and many colleges are upping their $40,000/year tuiton. CCSF used to be $11/semester/class, and now it's $11/unit, and since 1 class is anywhere from 3-4 units, it adds up, REAL FAST! Plus there's health, transcript, and processing fees. Over the phone or web, it's $3, just to send in your application! $50 for SFSU! College is expensive, before you even get in! So yes, set your goals, but make sure they're not unrealistic. I feel bad for my friends that try, try, try, and if they don't get something EXACTLY right, something REALLY perfect, they feel terrible. Love what you have, appreciate what you get, but never stop beign yourself and striving for more. Don't change yourself for someone else's sake-- not for your parents, not for a college, not to get on some stupid list. The feeling of accomplishment and self-worth is one YOU instill in YOURSELF, not one that someone bestows on you.
Having said my very long two bits, I shall get back to the momentous amount of reply email. Thank you for your time.
I was irritated on the bus on the way to school today-- to say the bus was packed would have been an understatement-- I was standing on the ledge just off the front door, and had it opened unexpectedly, I would have broken a leg. People filtered on and off, but some idiots refused to move back, even though there were seats to the left and right of them. Stupid girls with a single purse or shopping bag would block an old woman's way as she fumbled with a bag of groceries, trying to sit down. I hate people like that, and really want to tell them off. But no, it's not my place.
And you know what scares and disgusts me even more? Things like this. It strikes me as sad, pathetic, and god, how lucky I am to have live the life I have. No matter how much my mom pisses me off (or vice versa) she'd never be insane and idiotic enough to send me to Tranquility Bay. And THANK GODDESS for that! I feel so sorry for the hundreds of parents and kids that end up shipping $2000/month to send their kids to a "programme" like that. Ridiculous. But read it for yourself, and then we can both rant and rail about that together. I just have to say, I'm ecstatic that I don't live in Utah or Texas. Don't get me wrong, I have friends who live there, and they seem fine-- but I wouldn't want to be the kid of someone born and bred there their entire lives, someone who'd send me to a place like that if I "dressed inappropriately." I've been told I take things personal, but then I try to be myself and say what I feel, because "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seuss had something going on when he said that.
You should ALWAYS be yourself, and live life to the fullest, no matter what anyone else says. So likewise, while I can argue for hours on a subject, you can disagree with me, and that's okay, because if everyone agreed with everyone else, the world would be a very boring, drab place. So earlier in chat, Will was talking about how he didn't think he could go to Fanime 2K4, which is a shame. 4 Days, San Jose Convention Center, 2 Hotels, and supposed to be a hell of a lot more fun. Memorial Day weekend, when most families ship out one place or another. But Will was pretty insistent on being studious and "making the most of his senior year," which I commend him for. I know firsthand that when you slack off, it's a huge mistake. It's a lot of trials and tribulation to get up to your senior year, and you hear both sides of the argument-- one says that you shouldn't slack off senior year (which is very true) and the other that says you should enjoy every moment of it, and not get too caught up in everything (which is also true).
I was incredibly stressed most of my junior year. Depressed, suicidal, sick. Yes, my junior year sucked. I learned the lesson the hard way, as my 3.85 GPA plummetted to a 1.5. Never in my life had I ever gotten anything so low. I was ashamed. I hated the way people always seemed to TELL me "You're so smart, you can do this and this and that..." when all I wanted to do was tell them to shut up and let me go at my own pace. But maybe on some subliminal level, people telling me like that -pressuring me, even- got me thinking how much nicer it is to recieve compliments than sad stares and admonishings.
I've known people going to Lowell become suicidal and so involved in their study that they never have time for a social life. And that ruins you. If I hadn't met everyone from RTA when I did, I might have strayed down a Very Bad Path. So I guess you could say I was "saved" by some very good friends, even if they didn't know it. Senior year, I balanced doing what I loved (writing, journalism) with what I had to do (get better in math, make up Japanese). True, I didn't take my swim test, but then, I still have sciatica, a perfectly medical excuse. And one day I'll be able to swim like I used to, and maybe I'll be able to do those 6 laps and water treading without even thinking about it.
But life's too short for regrets. High school is supposed to be both the best and worst years of your life, and for me, that's damn true. I met some incredible people, did some fantastic things, had some rotten times, and had lots of break downs. I didn't throw myself totally into studying though-- it just made things harder. I'm not saying HS doesn't matter at all in your senior year, because it DOES, especially if you know what you want to do with your life afterwards (college, major, etc.). Lots of people these days want to go to college, get BAs, MAs, PHds. GOOD! Go for it! I can't encourage you enough! But there's also the sad side-- college is expensive. And plenty of colleges -private, government owned, or otherwise- have reputations that don't fit their educational curriculum.
Like the UC system. I personally hate it, but Katia's going to UC Berkley, Eva's going to UCLA, and Marcella's going to UC Santa Cruz. They friggin' RULE. I'm so proud of them. But me? No, the UC system is not for me, despite Mrs. Thompson's repeated attempts to get me to believe otherwise. I have friends like Cassie going to CCSF, and after having gone there for some time, I think it's a pretty good school-- but it's a challenge to actually take the classes you need/want, and then get OUT in 2 years. People get lazy, and don't do that anymore. Try getting your BA in four years, even at a State University. It might not happen, and that's the grim truth of things.
CA in particular has suffered extreme budget cuts and losses, and many colleges are upping their $40,000/year tuiton. CCSF used to be $11/semester/class, and now it's $11/unit, and since 1 class is anywhere from 3-4 units, it adds up, REAL FAST! Plus there's health, transcript, and processing fees. Over the phone or web, it's $3, just to send in your application! $50 for SFSU! College is expensive, before you even get in! So yes, set your goals, but make sure they're not unrealistic. I feel bad for my friends that try, try, try, and if they don't get something EXACTLY right, something REALLY perfect, they feel terrible. Love what you have, appreciate what you get, but never stop beign yourself and striving for more. Don't change yourself for someone else's sake-- not for your parents, not for a college, not to get on some stupid list. The feeling of accomplishment and self-worth is one YOU instill in YOURSELF, not one that someone bestows on you.
Having said my very long two bits, I shall get back to the momentous amount of reply email. Thank you for your time.
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no subject
Date: 2003-07-11 01:48 am (UTC)I HATED when people told me things like that.
Grr..
I miss you. It's been a while. <3
Re:
Date: 2003-07-11 02:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-07-11 02:31 am (UTC)