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azuriteThis isn't really a YKYWTM[PotC]W... lists, it's just me and an insane idea for a video. But it may have spoilers for DMC, so at least you're forewarned.
So I was listening to Shania Twain's "That Don't Impress Me Much" and it occurred to me (in my PotC-induced haze) that it totally fit Elizabeth and her "predicament."
I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart
But you've got being right down to an art
You think you're a genius-you drive me up the wall
You're a regular original, a know-it-all
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else
Okay, so you're a rocket scientist
That don't impress me much
So you got the brain but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
That don't impress me much
This is totally Captain Norrington. He's all high born and perfect, a commander. He's well-respected, etc. etc... up until DMC, anyway. But imagine that we're talking about pre-DMC, or post-DMC when he gets (maybe) his prestige back, after double crossing everyone and using Davy Jones' heart to bribe Beckett.
But part of what is so frustrating about him to Elizabeth is just that-- he's so perfect. "It is a smart match," but smart doesn't mean right. This guy would be devoted and socially capable, but his know-it-all (knows-what's-best) attitude would only restrict Elizabeth further.
I never knew a guy who carried a mirror in his pocket
And a comb up his sleeve-just in case
And all that extra hold gel in your hair oughtta lock it
'Cause Heaven forbid it should fall outta place
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else
Okay, so you're Brad Pitt
That don't impress me much
So you got the looks but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
That don't impress me much
Ah, much as I hate to say it, this is Will. Okay, so he's not as self-absorbed as this verse would have you think, but come on, it'sOrlando Bloom Will! He's spent his whole life at Port Royal working hard and in his own not-so-subtle way (at least to Norrington and Govr. Swann) trying to impress Elizabeth. If it makes her happy, it makes him happy...
>_> But because I'm a WE shipper, or because this song can't PERFECTLY fit the PotC gang, there's no real way I can extend the verse to match Will. He's not that much of an egoist.
You're one of those guys who likes to shine his machine
You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in
I can't believe you kiss your car good night
C'mon baby tell me-you must be jokin', right!
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else
Okay, so you've got a car
That don't impress me much
So you got the moves but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
JAAAAAAACK! Jack and his Pearl. Jack and THE Pearl. Always Jack, always with the ships. This is one of the reasons why I think JE could never work out, even if it's got a severe amount of steam to it. Yeah, WE is all pure and canon and cute and fluff and everything, but JE is smoldering, temptation, badness! But then there's Jack and his constant need to always be somewhere else, finding something else. And he's an odd pirate, too-- sneaky, thieving, "lying," and many other things- but he seems to avoid harming others. On the flip side, he's horribly selfish, and doesn't seem to care much for the others that get in his way, or get harmed because of him. Jack doesn't have the time nor the attention span to dedicate to a relationship, and when Elizabeth wants attention, she wouldn't get it from him. Alas.
That don't impress me much
You think you're cool but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm on the long, cold, lonely night
That don't impress me much
Okay, so what do you think you're Elvis or something...
Oo-Oh-Oh
That don't impress me much!
Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-No
Alright! Alright!
You're Tarzan!
Captain Kirk maybe.
John Wayne.
Whatever!
That don't impress me much!
In short, Elizabeth would kick so much more ass on her own. :P
Also, I must go to Borders to get the new "Pirateology" book. I saw some Sample Pages, and the one of the Caribbean Pirate looks like someone cross-bred Will and Jack. It's hilarious. It might provide some good material for future PotC fics, too, now that I'm officially in the fandom and writing for it. And since I've been spoiled a bit about some scenes from the 3rd movie, I might try to take what I know and run with it.
Finally, I wanna see all those books that came out for PotC: Dead Man's Chest and see how they novelized/summarized the movie, especially in the kiddie versions made for boys/girls specifically (the girl one was called "Swann Song" but I only saw the first page). And I know they have "The Adventures of young Jack Sparrow," so :> that's pretty cool. It's like Young Indiana Jones, but with pirates. :D
So I was listening to Shania Twain's "That Don't Impress Me Much" and it occurred to me (in my PotC-induced haze) that it totally fit Elizabeth and her "predicament."
I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart
But you've got being right down to an art
You think you're a genius-you drive me up the wall
You're a regular original, a know-it-all
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else
Okay, so you're a rocket scientist
That don't impress me much
So you got the brain but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
That don't impress me much
This is totally Captain Norrington. He's all high born and perfect, a commander. He's well-respected, etc. etc... up until DMC, anyway. But imagine that we're talking about pre-DMC, or post-DMC when he gets (maybe) his prestige back, after double crossing everyone and using Davy Jones' heart to bribe Beckett.
But part of what is so frustrating about him to Elizabeth is just that-- he's so perfect. "It is a smart match," but smart doesn't mean right. This guy would be devoted and socially capable, but his know-it-all (knows-what's-best) attitude would only restrict Elizabeth further.
I never knew a guy who carried a mirror in his pocket
And a comb up his sleeve-just in case
And all that extra hold gel in your hair oughtta lock it
'Cause Heaven forbid it should fall outta place
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else
Okay, so you're Brad Pitt
That don't impress me much
So you got the looks but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
That don't impress me much
Ah, much as I hate to say it, this is Will. Okay, so he's not as self-absorbed as this verse would have you think, but come on, it's
>_> But because I'm a WE shipper, or because this song can't PERFECTLY fit the PotC gang, there's no real way I can extend the verse to match Will. He's not that much of an egoist.
You're one of those guys who likes to shine his machine
You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in
I can't believe you kiss your car good night
C'mon baby tell me-you must be jokin', right!
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else
Okay, so you've got a car
That don't impress me much
So you got the moves but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
JAAAAAAACK! Jack and his Pearl. Jack and THE Pearl. Always Jack, always with the ships. This is one of the reasons why I think JE could never work out, even if it's got a severe amount of steam to it. Yeah, WE is all pure and canon and cute and fluff and everything, but JE is smoldering, temptation, badness! But then there's Jack and his constant need to always be somewhere else, finding something else. And he's an odd pirate, too-- sneaky, thieving, "lying," and many other things- but he seems to avoid harming others. On the flip side, he's horribly selfish, and doesn't seem to care much for the others that get in his way, or get harmed because of him. Jack doesn't have the time nor the attention span to dedicate to a relationship, and when Elizabeth wants attention, she wouldn't get it from him. Alas.
That don't impress me much
You think you're cool but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm on the long, cold, lonely night
That don't impress me much
Okay, so what do you think you're Elvis or something...
Oo-Oh-Oh
That don't impress me much!
Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-No
Alright! Alright!
You're Tarzan!
Captain Kirk maybe.
John Wayne.
Whatever!
That don't impress me much!
In short, Elizabeth would kick so much more ass on her own. :P
Also, I must go to Borders to get the new "Pirateology" book. I saw some Sample Pages, and the one of the Caribbean Pirate looks like someone cross-bred Will and Jack. It's hilarious. It might provide some good material for future PotC fics, too, now that I'm officially in the fandom and writing for it. And since I've been spoiled a bit about some scenes from the 3rd movie, I might try to take what I know and run with it.
Finally, I wanna see all those books that came out for PotC: Dead Man's Chest and see how they novelized/summarized the movie, especially in the kiddie versions made for boys/girls specifically (the girl one was called "Swann Song" but I only saw the first page). And I know they have "The Adventures of young Jack Sparrow," so :> that's pretty cool. It's like Young Indiana Jones, but with pirates. :D
