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azuriteEven more review replies, taken directly from the page at FFnet/my email. These review replies would have appeared in Chapter 15. I don't include the actual reviews FOR SOME OF THEM; go to FFnet or MMorg and look at the Review History if you want to see them. If people start reading the fic from the beginning and reviewing for the earlier chapters, I'll update this (and the other) chapter page(s) with replies to them as I see fit.
These replies are new!!
Also, new format for replying to LONG reviews-- I'll post my replies in PLAIN TEXT font, with no italicization or bolding. They'll appear between paragraphs of long reviews!
Nachzes Black-Rider -- Nachzes: Hmm...likes it. See, Truth Lies Dreaming, WhiteLightening, all you guys, het (even SetoXTea) CAN be good. [grins as her friends vomit spectacularly and faint on the floor] Guess they don't believe me. Oh well. [smiles happily] Never mess with a girl when she's PMS-ing or CGTMS-ing. Ever. Never ever never. [shakes head] Not smart.
*grin* I believe those other names are other authors, right? I'll have to check them out, then. It's sad that some people don't want to give het a chance, but as is my stance with yaoi (I'm just not comfortable with it), so too may other authors be with het. Oh well. You can't win them all! But what's CGTMS, anyway? o_O Do I want to know?
violet eyes rika -- YES! Finally Tea is not a damsel in distress but an ass-kicker! I've read to many stories like that. Okay now this is NOT a flame (I love this story!) I'm just giving you some advice with compliments in the middle. Now lets see what's on the chopping block.
So far this story is actually longer than some Harry Potter stories (especially that 105 page chapter) which (Gasp!) is actually good and the first true story I've ever read that can be a book. So long chapters good.
Honestly, I never realize how long my chapters are until they're finished. o_O But aren't today's HP books upwards of 700 pages? I'm not sure mine have quite reached that point yet, but if anyone wants to pit me against JK for a couple million euros, I'll be glad to take on the challenge...
Next your use of bold letterings. Maybe use a little bit less to make it more powerful when a reader comes across it. You are on the borderline of extensive use and just right.
I've gotten that more than you'd think, actually. I'm trying to cut back, but my stance on using any sort of bolding or italicizing is "if I hear it in my head with emphasis, I'll put the emphasis in." If the emphasis doesn't make sense a second read-around, I'll cut it-- but I honestly try not to do it too much. I find it better to use only bolding and italicizing, instead of *asterisking* and _underlining_ and everything else in between (like ALL CAPS!) too. So that might be part of the reason you see it frequently.
Anyway next is a big issue. Sometimes you forget to insert the characters present standing point (that didn't make sense). Example, in chapter 11 when tea is looking at the album seto made for her you forget to mention she is sitting on the couch when she's looking at it because when you say seto looks down in his lap and I became confused. Then later when they... get together I figured out they were sitting on the couch.
Thanks for this-- when I reread the scene in question, I realized your confusion, and I fixed the error. I revise as I go with my chapters, and though most changes tend to be little (removing emphasis, fixing spelling or grammar, etc.) occasionally I do make changes that create a "better read" for the chapters. Try giving the chapters another once-over to see if they're any better to you.
Next is something that most professional authors are also bad at. It's another balance thing. Talking versus description. How can I say this... for some authors they just dump all of the dialoge together and then go on and on about the descprition and you become bored to death and throw away the book. Then some authors, like myself, which I hate myself for, who does this fluent, graceful description and then does scarcly any dialoge. Anyway getting to the point you don't seem to have a rythm yet. Like some chapters it's the first example then the next chapter it goes to the second example. I saying there's nothing wrong with it and it's quite interesting to see what you do next.
And I say this again I'm just giving adive and you can completly ignore this.
violet Eyes Rika
It's a matter of an author's style; sometimes, as you said, authors stick with a purely dialogue-driven format, while others like to use all prose/description, and little to no dialogue at all. In my case, I try to visualize the scene in my head; if confrontations like Téa had with the Big Five come across as better with dialogue, that's how I'll write it. Normally, it's only scenes where there is no character interaction do I do away with dialogue altogether.
Certain chapters NEED to lack dialogue in order to be powerful that way; sometimes it only applies to certain things. There's no golden rule about a "balance" between dialogue and description; it's whatever works for that story/scene. Thanks for all your advice, though!
WinterWing3000 -- Yay! Tea finally KICKS ASS! (With her period ^_^U)
This chapter was fun to read but also very erk... I didn't really like the part with Crump and his lackeys doing THAT to her. It just didn't sound right. And I really like the idea of the secret passage. This story's like a action movie... at least this chapter was. You know, the fluff, the action, the horror, the 'naughty things'.
Haha... well, I do have to inject a good deal of "erk" in the story, because not everything can be fluffy bunnies and butt-kicking. I really wanted to portray Crump and his associates as complete jerks; the reader should NOT sympathize, understand, or like them in any size, shape, or form, because they're pretty much the main villains of the entire story. So you do have to imagine them being the honestly bad, corrupted-heart sort of guys-- even if it means visualizing bad situations. It's the only way to really be in Téa's shoes.
Anywho, I'm GLAD that somewhere later in the story, Joey and Mai are going to overcome the fault and become one once more. They're just too cute together to keep apart!
And Seto and Joey... friends are good, but rivals are better. Hopefully, they'll pick one of them because I smell something between the two. Seto's jealousy made it seem realistic when Tea's all holding Joey's hand in a sweet, gentle way! And Joey, he's hard to read. I think he's still has that little crush on Tea SOMEWHERE. Just a thought though, I'm sure he's fully committed to Mai now that he and she are... have done THAT.
*grin* Trust me, I love triangles and odd dynamics of any sort. I love the idea of a rivalry!friendship between Seto and Joey, even though for the majority of the series, Seto pretty much considered Joey the equivalent of gum on his shoe. Still, WDKY aims to bring people closer together and reveal that life forces growth and change-- even in stubborn guys like Seto and Joey.
As for the Seto x Téa x Joey triangle, I won't say a peep about that-- it'll come up again in Chapter 17 (and later).
And Joey gets to stay with them for a week! ^-^ That'll truly be a chapter to read! Eheheh... pranks on Seto maybe?
Again, Chapter 17! Look forward to it!
Hawkgal -- SWEET! I'm so happy we get a long one after those two short chappies. And man was it worth it. Your ablititly astounds me. I only wish I could write a fraction on how good you do.
One thing, I want to see Joey and Mai resolve things. I've been waiting paicnetly and I think it's time. And the always enjoyed fluff between tea and seto.
But other then that, perfection! Hurrary! And I can't wait for your next chapter to come out (it's long isn't it? I think you said it was).
Great job and keep with the updates.
Hope you had a great holidays and Happy New Year!
*bows* Thanks for the high praise! As I tell almost every author who reviews, it's all about keeping up with your reading and writing. Each person has their own ideas and style, and nothing substitutes for actual experience! So keep at it!
As for Joey and Mai, I will eventually resolve things with them, but they're a secondary/minor pairing in this fic; they won't receive enough focus every chapter for me to say things one way or another, but trust me-- they'll be back in thesteam spotlight soon enough. ^_~
Svelte Rose -- If only I knew how to make my own clothing, I would've made Tea's outfit in the story when she went to see the Big 5. ^_^;;
What I like most about this chapter is the fact that we've started going after the Big 5. I'd love to see how each one gets defeated by the gang in each chapter. ^_^ I'd also like to know what secrets the Gardners harbor. Mwahaha...
I'm mostly curious as to what will occur with Bakura/Ryou though. He just sort of disappeared - it's sort of sad.
Can't wait to see the next chickita!
-Svelte
Truth is, Téa's outfit is actually based off one that I own... *blush* Hey, a girl's got to get inspiration from somewhere, right? I even have a fanart of her in it (with her heel on Crump's chest, no less), but I need to edit it a bit before I post it. Bug me about it and you'll see it, okay?
We have started going after the Big Five, but since I started the story with the deaths of Téa's parents (which turned out to be a massive conspiracy), I wanted to also FINISH the fic with the closing of that arc. Since we're not even halfway through the fic yet, it might be a while before I "polish off" the Big Five. Still, look forward to it!
Bakura/Ryou works along the same lines as Mokuba-- integral to the story, a great character with a myriad of possibilities-- but an outright pain to work into the story at times. At least with Bakura, he can conveniently disappear for a while and return, having been up to "mischief" or "no good," but no one will be the wiser except for you, dear reader! Don't worry, he will be coming back... eventually. ^_~
wackoramaco87 -- Awesome chapter! I loved the way Tea kicked all those bad guy's arses! Funnier yet, she did it all during *that* time of the month! =P
I can't wait to see what's going to happen next chapter, and when and if Kaiba will ever admit his "love" for Tea!
I'm a firm believer that period or no, girls can do anything. *grin* Sometimes they don't want to get out of bed or even move, but... in situations like Téa's, when need calls for it, butt-kicking can be done. Had? Something like that. I didn't want to over-generalize what mood swings are like during a girl's period, but at least I can use the age old excuse "Hey! I've been there, done that, bought the rag! I can say what I want!" *smirk*
Starian Princess -- This chapter was a turning point right? Well, in an unspoken way Seto and Joey actually became friends, tried to save Tea- who actually might've not needed it to begin with, and Seto is still in confusion about how he really feels about Tea. I can't wait for more chapters. Continue soon! And Happy New Year!^^
In a manner of speaking, yes-- Joey and Seto have embarked down a path neither of them have been down before, but they're far from slapping on a pair of rollerblades and skating down said path-- they're both very reluctant sorts, and I don't see them as becoming "fast friends" in any sort of situation, regardless of what --or who!-- they have in common. Still, as I've told other readers, I like the banter and dynamic between them, so you'll definitely see more of them "together" in future chapters.
unknown reviewer -- Excellent as usual. This chapter is just the right lenght. Not to short, but not to long. Then again, I love all your chapters no matter the lenght. I did find it a little weird that Tea was able to take out 6 fully grown men but hey it's your story and it still works.
I Wonder what the rest of the big 5 have planned...
Keep it up!
Sincerely,
THE UNKNOWN REVIEWER
Sometimes, I do manage to get chapters a "good" length for all readers-- for this chapter I've received very little commentary on it being "too short" or "too long." I guess I should be pleased?
In any case, I have to subject my readers to "anime logic" for this chapter-- after all, if Yugi can take out 10,000 year old masters, ghosts, and freakish Millennium Item holders, why can't his friends show the same sort of kick-butt power against "regular" villains like the dastardly Big Five? In truth, they did have her in a bind for a while, but luck (and mood swings) were on Téa's side. You'd never want to mess with a girl in an office building, anyway-- she can turn everything she sees into a weapon! Heh...
Sindelle -- I love this story. You have a talent for weaving romance, drama, action, and humor together perfectly in your writing. You keep the characters in character so well, which isn't always an easy thing to do. You are truly a talented author and I can't wait for the next chapter of this story.
Wow, thank you very much! *bows* You flatter me, really! Short of repeating myself (I try to keep everyone in character and use a good mix of all the genres), thank you again and again... I hope you keep reading and reviewing!
Dragonic Soul -- So, one barrier between Joey-kun and Seto-kun comes down... only bout 49 to go. ^.^
Hah! True... (*sings* 49 barriers of hate on the wall, 49 barriers of hate...)
Marin M -- Great chappie ^_^ It totally rox. Oh yeah, I just realized that the club in the story, is the same club near my house o_O Club DV8? Weird huh?
Wow, I didn't even know there was a real club under that name! Truth is, I based the club name after the one the Devil/Satan madehis her home base in the movie "Bedazzled." Say DV8 aloud and you get "deviate," which means to go off the given course... which is what the people in the club all do with their lives.
Liz Inc -- no, i couldn't picture it either...joey and kaiba friends. but if it happens, it happens! because anything can, can't it? ^_^ anyway...i want to check out your stuff on darknes srising, but...i can't seem to find it. >_< go figure. do you have a link somewhere that I could click? if not, s'okay. just wondering! ^_^
i look forward to your later updates, cause this story - although, im sure you've been told this at LEAST 600 times already - TOTALLY ROCKS! (heck, i think i even said it in my last review! ^_^U) update soon!
Darkness Rising is located here: http://azurite.incandesce.org/amc/yugioh
I'm sorry if anyone's been confused by the links and whatnot I've provided in fics-- FFnet doesn't allow me to provide whole URLs, so your best bet is to either email me or check my FFnet profile for links! Darkness Rising is also due for an overhaul this summer, so look forward to it!
Thanks again for the compliments and support!
DarkShadowFlame -- Wow. I think Tea's missed her true calling in life. She shouldn't be a dancer, she should be a... ninja. Maybe a dancing ninja, since she does enjoy dancing.
Go ninja, go ninja, go! *grin* Okay, I have to admit, that first line of your review had me cracking up the first time I read it. Now I'd love to see Ninja!Téa trying her hand (or feet, or lethal weapon-striking-power) at Dance Dance Revolution. Hah!
I was hoping she'd push Crump out the window. Glad - or maybe it's not-so-glad - to see that Crump is the same old pervert he was in Noa's Arc. Blech. Why did Tea wear a skirt to a meeting if she also knew she might have to use a nail file to slice through rope, meaning trouble??
Ah, but I didn't want Crump's "end" to be definitive as yet. That's a sneaky enough statement as it is. Interpret it as you will.
As for why Téa wore a skirt to a meeting-- well, she's not much of a pants person. Really. As much as I'd love to stuff her in a pantsuit, she's one of those characters VERY comfortable with her femininity, and I've never seen her wearing something that DOESN'T show off her legs. Besides, as she was running away from school, she would have stuck out a lot more if she'd been wearing pants-- after all, all the other girls leaving school (even the teachers) would have been wearing skirts. Short of her dressing up as a boy to evade Seto's notice, I saw no other way for her to dress. I also figured she might want to look a bit "professional" while going to encounter Crump and Co.-- after all, she doesn't want them to think of her as some "little school girl," but as someone who is seriously a threat to the Big Five. The nail file was "just in case."
Ouch. Period. While being tied down. That must *suck*.
Oh, and I loved Joey in this chapter. I can't wait 'till he stays with the Kaibas (and Tea). That's bound to be hilarious. I also hope the poor guy works things out with Mai.
Whoo! Yes, I love Joey. He's so fun to work with! He'll be staying with Téa and the Kaibas in chapter 17. Look forward to it! (I hope it meets and goes beyond your expectations...)
The hurdles Seto and Joey had to face in getting to the office building were really fun to read too - it was just one more bit of action to really give this chapter it's three-dimensional nature.
I'm aware that this review has been rather disjointed, but I hope you got the jist of it (basically, I LOVE the chapter). I admit that I'm glad it's longer again!
I'm slightly late (or maybe not, depending on what you celebrate) but happy holidays!
DSF
I wanted something to keep Joey and Seto distracted, but also force them to work together. They still had their banter (when Seto first discovered the secret passageway into the back area), so it worked out well in the end (I think). As always, I love adding a bit of "oomph" to each of my chapters to make it a more interesting/fun read.
Thanks again for your review and your support! ^_^v (I keep giggling madly every time I see a review from you, just because I like your stuff so much...)
Solar Kitty -- Yay for Joey! Haha, I really loved all the Joey and Kaiba interaction! I really think Kaiba needs to suck it up and tell Téa he loves her. He isn't fooling anyone but himself. It's so obvious he loves her! And Joey needs to make amends with Mai too!
I'm glad that Téa wasn't just a helpless victim! I hope there will be more action from her!
I am looking forward to the next chapter! And just a question... did Bakura ever end up collecting on Kaiba's debt to him? Meep... maybe I should go back and read all the chapters again to make sure ^^'
Excellent chapter as always! Ja ne!
~ Solar-chan
Ooh, that would make a nice catchphrase for Seto/WDKY... on an icon, maybe? "I'm not fooling anyone..." or something along those lines. It really does fit Seto, mm? As for love, I never see it as something glaringly obvious, but certainly fun to dangle in front of people's faces.
Téa is never going to be a helpless victim in this fic-- no matter what horrible situations I put her into (Oops! :X) she is definitely going to grow, change, and become a powerful force to deal with.
As for Bakura... well, he's tricky to work with, but no, he has not yet collected on his debt from Kaiba. You've actually nailed one of my sneaky little subplots on the head! It'll be a lasting theme throughout this fic and the sequel...
Janime Lee -- Tis 1:37am EST, and I have to be in at work at 6am. Yes, this fic is that good I am willing to lose sleep! Can't wait for your next chapter!
Bakura, Bakura, oh Spirit of the Millennium Ring, what are you up to?
Now THAT is a high compliment-- when I can keep people reading my horrifically long chapters, to the point where they're missing good ol' sleep! Thanks very much! I hope you enjoy all the future chapters (review?) and don't worry-- Bakura WILL be coming back... eventually.
These replies are new!!
Also, new format for replying to LONG reviews-- I'll post my replies in PLAIN TEXT font, with no italicization or bolding. They'll appear between paragraphs of long reviews!
Nachzes Black-Rider -- Nachzes: Hmm...likes it. See, Truth Lies Dreaming, WhiteLightening, all you guys, het (even SetoXTea) CAN be good. [grins as her friends vomit spectacularly and faint on the floor] Guess they don't believe me. Oh well. [smiles happily] Never mess with a girl when she's PMS-ing or CGTMS-ing. Ever. Never ever never. [shakes head] Not smart.
*grin* I believe those other names are other authors, right? I'll have to check them out, then. It's sad that some people don't want to give het a chance, but as is my stance with yaoi (I'm just not comfortable with it), so too may other authors be with het. Oh well. You can't win them all! But what's CGTMS, anyway? o_O Do I want to know?
violet eyes rika -- YES! Finally Tea is not a damsel in distress but an ass-kicker! I've read to many stories like that. Okay now this is NOT a flame (I love this story!) I'm just giving you some advice with compliments in the middle. Now lets see what's on the chopping block.
So far this story is actually longer than some Harry Potter stories (especially that 105 page chapter) which (Gasp!) is actually good and the first true story I've ever read that can be a book. So long chapters good.
Honestly, I never realize how long my chapters are until they're finished. o_O But aren't today's HP books upwards of 700 pages? I'm not sure mine have quite reached that point yet, but if anyone wants to pit me against JK for a couple million euros, I'll be glad to take on the challenge...
Next your use of bold letterings. Maybe use a little bit less to make it more powerful when a reader comes across it. You are on the borderline of extensive use and just right.
I've gotten that more than you'd think, actually. I'm trying to cut back, but my stance on using any sort of bolding or italicizing is "if I hear it in my head with emphasis, I'll put the emphasis in." If the emphasis doesn't make sense a second read-around, I'll cut it-- but I honestly try not to do it too much. I find it better to use only bolding and italicizing, instead of *asterisking* and _underlining_ and everything else in between (like ALL CAPS!) too. So that might be part of the reason you see it frequently.
Anyway next is a big issue. Sometimes you forget to insert the characters present standing point (that didn't make sense). Example, in chapter 11 when tea is looking at the album seto made for her you forget to mention she is sitting on the couch when she's looking at it because when you say seto looks down in his lap and I became confused. Then later when they... get together I figured out they were sitting on the couch.
Thanks for this-- when I reread the scene in question, I realized your confusion, and I fixed the error. I revise as I go with my chapters, and though most changes tend to be little (removing emphasis, fixing spelling or grammar, etc.) occasionally I do make changes that create a "better read" for the chapters. Try giving the chapters another once-over to see if they're any better to you.
Next is something that most professional authors are also bad at. It's another balance thing. Talking versus description. How can I say this... for some authors they just dump all of the dialoge together and then go on and on about the descprition and you become bored to death and throw away the book. Then some authors, like myself, which I hate myself for, who does this fluent, graceful description and then does scarcly any dialoge. Anyway getting to the point you don't seem to have a rythm yet. Like some chapters it's the first example then the next chapter it goes to the second example. I saying there's nothing wrong with it and it's quite interesting to see what you do next.
And I say this again I'm just giving adive and you can completly ignore this.
violet Eyes Rika
It's a matter of an author's style; sometimes, as you said, authors stick with a purely dialogue-driven format, while others like to use all prose/description, and little to no dialogue at all. In my case, I try to visualize the scene in my head; if confrontations like Téa had with the Big Five come across as better with dialogue, that's how I'll write it. Normally, it's only scenes where there is no character interaction do I do away with dialogue altogether.
Certain chapters NEED to lack dialogue in order to be powerful that way; sometimes it only applies to certain things. There's no golden rule about a "balance" between dialogue and description; it's whatever works for that story/scene. Thanks for all your advice, though!
WinterWing3000 -- Yay! Tea finally KICKS ASS! (With her period ^_^U)
This chapter was fun to read but also very erk... I didn't really like the part with Crump and his lackeys doing THAT to her. It just didn't sound right. And I really like the idea of the secret passage. This story's like a action movie... at least this chapter was. You know, the fluff, the action, the horror, the 'naughty things'.
Haha... well, I do have to inject a good deal of "erk" in the story, because not everything can be fluffy bunnies and butt-kicking. I really wanted to portray Crump and his associates as complete jerks; the reader should NOT sympathize, understand, or like them in any size, shape, or form, because they're pretty much the main villains of the entire story. So you do have to imagine them being the honestly bad, corrupted-heart sort of guys-- even if it means visualizing bad situations. It's the only way to really be in Téa's shoes.
Anywho, I'm GLAD that somewhere later in the story, Joey and Mai are going to overcome the fault and become one once more. They're just too cute together to keep apart!
And Seto and Joey... friends are good, but rivals are better. Hopefully, they'll pick one of them because I smell something between the two. Seto's jealousy made it seem realistic when Tea's all holding Joey's hand in a sweet, gentle way! And Joey, he's hard to read. I think he's still has that little crush on Tea SOMEWHERE. Just a thought though, I'm sure he's fully committed to Mai now that he and she are... have done THAT.
*grin* Trust me, I love triangles and odd dynamics of any sort. I love the idea of a rivalry!friendship between Seto and Joey, even though for the majority of the series, Seto pretty much considered Joey the equivalent of gum on his shoe. Still, WDKY aims to bring people closer together and reveal that life forces growth and change-- even in stubborn guys like Seto and Joey.
As for the Seto x Téa x Joey triangle, I won't say a peep about that-- it'll come up again in Chapter 17 (and later).
And Joey gets to stay with them for a week! ^-^ That'll truly be a chapter to read! Eheheh... pranks on Seto maybe?
Again, Chapter 17! Look forward to it!
Hawkgal -- SWEET! I'm so happy we get a long one after those two short chappies. And man was it worth it. Your ablititly astounds me. I only wish I could write a fraction on how good you do.
One thing, I want to see Joey and Mai resolve things. I've been waiting paicnetly and I think it's time. And the always enjoyed fluff between tea and seto.
But other then that, perfection! Hurrary! And I can't wait for your next chapter to come out (it's long isn't it? I think you said it was).
Great job and keep with the updates.
Hope you had a great holidays and Happy New Year!
*bows* Thanks for the high praise! As I tell almost every author who reviews, it's all about keeping up with your reading and writing. Each person has their own ideas and style, and nothing substitutes for actual experience! So keep at it!
As for Joey and Mai, I will eventually resolve things with them, but they're a secondary/minor pairing in this fic; they won't receive enough focus every chapter for me to say things one way or another, but trust me-- they'll be back in the
Svelte Rose -- If only I knew how to make my own clothing, I would've made Tea's outfit in the story when she went to see the Big 5. ^_^;;
What I like most about this chapter is the fact that we've started going after the Big 5. I'd love to see how each one gets defeated by the gang in each chapter. ^_^ I'd also like to know what secrets the Gardners harbor. Mwahaha...
I'm mostly curious as to what will occur with Bakura/Ryou though. He just sort of disappeared - it's sort of sad.
Can't wait to see the next chickita!
-Svelte
Truth is, Téa's outfit is actually based off one that I own... *blush* Hey, a girl's got to get inspiration from somewhere, right? I even have a fanart of her in it (with her heel on Crump's chest, no less), but I need to edit it a bit before I post it. Bug me about it and you'll see it, okay?
We have started going after the Big Five, but since I started the story with the deaths of Téa's parents (which turned out to be a massive conspiracy), I wanted to also FINISH the fic with the closing of that arc. Since we're not even halfway through the fic yet, it might be a while before I "polish off" the Big Five. Still, look forward to it!
Bakura/Ryou works along the same lines as Mokuba-- integral to the story, a great character with a myriad of possibilities-- but an outright pain to work into the story at times. At least with Bakura, he can conveniently disappear for a while and return, having been up to "mischief" or "no good," but no one will be the wiser except for you, dear reader! Don't worry, he will be coming back... eventually. ^_~
wackoramaco87 -- Awesome chapter! I loved the way Tea kicked all those bad guy's arses! Funnier yet, she did it all during *that* time of the month! =P
I can't wait to see what's going to happen next chapter, and when and if Kaiba will ever admit his "love" for Tea!
I'm a firm believer that period or no, girls can do anything. *grin* Sometimes they don't want to get out of bed or even move, but... in situations like Téa's, when need calls for it, butt-kicking can be done. Had? Something like that. I didn't want to over-generalize what mood swings are like during a girl's period, but at least I can use the age old excuse "Hey! I've been there, done that, bought the rag! I can say what I want!" *smirk*
Starian Princess -- This chapter was a turning point right? Well, in an unspoken way Seto and Joey actually became friends, tried to save Tea- who actually might've not needed it to begin with, and Seto is still in confusion about how he really feels about Tea. I can't wait for more chapters. Continue soon! And Happy New Year!^^
In a manner of speaking, yes-- Joey and Seto have embarked down a path neither of them have been down before, but they're far from slapping on a pair of rollerblades and skating down said path-- they're both very reluctant sorts, and I don't see them as becoming "fast friends" in any sort of situation, regardless of what --or who!-- they have in common. Still, as I've told other readers, I like the banter and dynamic between them, so you'll definitely see more of them "together" in future chapters.
unknown reviewer -- Excellent as usual. This chapter is just the right lenght. Not to short, but not to long. Then again, I love all your chapters no matter the lenght. I did find it a little weird that Tea was able to take out 6 fully grown men but hey it's your story and it still works.
I Wonder what the rest of the big 5 have planned...
Keep it up!
Sincerely,
THE UNKNOWN REVIEWER
Sometimes, I do manage to get chapters a "good" length for all readers-- for this chapter I've received very little commentary on it being "too short" or "too long." I guess I should be pleased?
In any case, I have to subject my readers to "anime logic" for this chapter-- after all, if Yugi can take out 10,000 year old masters, ghosts, and freakish Millennium Item holders, why can't his friends show the same sort of kick-butt power against "regular" villains like the dastardly Big Five? In truth, they did have her in a bind for a while, but luck (and mood swings) were on Téa's side. You'd never want to mess with a girl in an office building, anyway-- she can turn everything she sees into a weapon! Heh...
Sindelle -- I love this story. You have a talent for weaving romance, drama, action, and humor together perfectly in your writing. You keep the characters in character so well, which isn't always an easy thing to do. You are truly a talented author and I can't wait for the next chapter of this story.
Wow, thank you very much! *bows* You flatter me, really! Short of repeating myself (I try to keep everyone in character and use a good mix of all the genres), thank you again and again... I hope you keep reading and reviewing!
Dragonic Soul -- So, one barrier between Joey-kun and Seto-kun comes down... only bout 49 to go. ^.^
Hah! True... (*sings* 49 barriers of hate on the wall, 49 barriers of hate...)
Marin M -- Great chappie ^_^ It totally rox. Oh yeah, I just realized that the club in the story, is the same club near my house o_O Club DV8? Weird huh?
Wow, I didn't even know there was a real club under that name! Truth is, I based the club name after the one the Devil/Satan made
Liz Inc -- no, i couldn't picture it either...joey and kaiba friends. but if it happens, it happens! because anything can, can't it? ^_^ anyway...i want to check out your stuff on darknes srising, but...i can't seem to find it. >_< go figure. do you have a link somewhere that I could click? if not, s'okay. just wondering! ^_^
i look forward to your later updates, cause this story - although, im sure you've been told this at LEAST 600 times already - TOTALLY ROCKS! (heck, i think i even said it in my last review! ^_^U) update soon!
Darkness Rising is located here: http://azurite.incandesce.org/amc/yugioh
I'm sorry if anyone's been confused by the links and whatnot I've provided in fics-- FFnet doesn't allow me to provide whole URLs, so your best bet is to either email me or check my FFnet profile for links! Darkness Rising is also due for an overhaul this summer, so look forward to it!
Thanks again for the compliments and support!
DarkShadowFlame -- Wow. I think Tea's missed her true calling in life. She shouldn't be a dancer, she should be a... ninja. Maybe a dancing ninja, since she does enjoy dancing.
Go ninja, go ninja, go! *grin* Okay, I have to admit, that first line of your review had me cracking up the first time I read it. Now I'd love to see Ninja!Téa trying her hand (or feet, or lethal weapon-striking-power) at Dance Dance Revolution. Hah!
I was hoping she'd push Crump out the window. Glad - or maybe it's not-so-glad - to see that Crump is the same old pervert he was in Noa's Arc. Blech. Why did Tea wear a skirt to a meeting if she also knew she might have to use a nail file to slice through rope, meaning trouble??
Ah, but I didn't want Crump's "end" to be definitive as yet. That's a sneaky enough statement as it is. Interpret it as you will.
As for why Téa wore a skirt to a meeting-- well, she's not much of a pants person. Really. As much as I'd love to stuff her in a pantsuit, she's one of those characters VERY comfortable with her femininity, and I've never seen her wearing something that DOESN'T show off her legs. Besides, as she was running away from school, she would have stuck out a lot more if she'd been wearing pants-- after all, all the other girls leaving school (even the teachers) would have been wearing skirts. Short of her dressing up as a boy to evade Seto's notice, I saw no other way for her to dress. I also figured she might want to look a bit "professional" while going to encounter Crump and Co.-- after all, she doesn't want them to think of her as some "little school girl," but as someone who is seriously a threat to the Big Five. The nail file was "just in case."
Ouch. Period. While being tied down. That must *suck*.
Oh, and I loved Joey in this chapter. I can't wait 'till he stays with the Kaibas (and Tea). That's bound to be hilarious. I also hope the poor guy works things out with Mai.
Whoo! Yes, I love Joey. He's so fun to work with! He'll be staying with Téa and the Kaibas in chapter 17. Look forward to it! (I hope it meets and goes beyond your expectations...)
The hurdles Seto and Joey had to face in getting to the office building were really fun to read too - it was just one more bit of action to really give this chapter it's three-dimensional nature.
I'm aware that this review has been rather disjointed, but I hope you got the jist of it (basically, I LOVE the chapter). I admit that I'm glad it's longer again!
I'm slightly late (or maybe not, depending on what you celebrate) but happy holidays!
DSF
I wanted something to keep Joey and Seto distracted, but also force them to work together. They still had their banter (when Seto first discovered the secret passageway into the back area), so it worked out well in the end (I think). As always, I love adding a bit of "oomph" to each of my chapters to make it a more interesting/fun read.
Thanks again for your review and your support! ^_^v (I keep giggling madly every time I see a review from you, just because I like your stuff so much...)
Solar Kitty -- Yay for Joey! Haha, I really loved all the Joey and Kaiba interaction! I really think Kaiba needs to suck it up and tell Téa he loves her. He isn't fooling anyone but himself. It's so obvious he loves her! And Joey needs to make amends with Mai too!
I'm glad that Téa wasn't just a helpless victim! I hope there will be more action from her!
I am looking forward to the next chapter! And just a question... did Bakura ever end up collecting on Kaiba's debt to him? Meep... maybe I should go back and read all the chapters again to make sure ^^'
Excellent chapter as always! Ja ne!
~ Solar-chan
Ooh, that would make a nice catchphrase for Seto/WDKY... on an icon, maybe? "I'm not fooling anyone..." or something along those lines. It really does fit Seto, mm? As for love, I never see it as something glaringly obvious, but certainly fun to dangle in front of people's faces.
Téa is never going to be a helpless victim in this fic-- no matter what horrible situations I put her into (Oops! :X) she is definitely going to grow, change, and become a powerful force to deal with.
As for Bakura... well, he's tricky to work with, but no, he has not yet collected on his debt from Kaiba. You've actually nailed one of my sneaky little subplots on the head! It'll be a lasting theme throughout this fic and the sequel...
Janime Lee -- Tis 1:37am EST, and I have to be in at work at 6am. Yes, this fic is that good I am willing to lose sleep! Can't wait for your next chapter!
Bakura, Bakura, oh Spirit of the Millennium Ring, what are you up to?
Now THAT is a high compliment-- when I can keep people reading my horrifically long chapters, to the point where they're missing good ol' sleep! Thanks very much! I hope you enjoy all the future chapters (review?) and don't worry-- Bakura WILL be coming back... eventually.
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It's true
Date: 2005-06-26 02:37 am (UTC)I could not fall asleep because so many questions were floating around in my mind of what would happen. After several moments of tossing and turning and playing my relaxation CD twice, I jumped out of bed and turned on my pc.
Caffeine was a good friend at work.
Re: It's true
Date: 2005-06-26 07:33 am (UTC)