azurite | Verses

Well, so that's it. The Mero Mero Bonfire has officially ended, and now I'm here lost in my thought, and my thoughts are of rather "sticky" songs stuck in my head... damn ear worms. See if you can guess the artist and song title based on the snippets I give.

The hardest part will be leaving you all/And I'll miss you much more than words can say/I'll be only a memory away...

We are strong/heartache to heartache/We stand/No promises, no demands/Love is a battlefield...

I lie awake/And try so hard/not to think of you/But who can decide what they dream?

If I smile and don't believe/Soon I know I'll wake from this dream

How stupid could I be?/A simpleton could see/...But you're the only one I see

It's okay, sometimes I just get this way/I can't forget you anyway/I wouldn't even try/I'd rather fall than never to have flown at all/It was heaven after all, if only for a time/Didn't we set the nights on fire/Did ever a flame burn any higher/Wasn't it so sweet? Wasn't it?/Didn't we love

Here's to the nights we felt alive/Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry/Here's to goodbye/Tomorrow's gonna come too soon

Yep, so a medley of somewhat depressing songs that have been in my head for a bit. But I'm doing better... Anyway, a recap of last night. So I was leaving the house just after 7pm; since Steph couldn't make it to my house, I couldn't lug the Gigantic Bag of Doom (aka the Harry and David bag full of paper, which probably weighs more than I do) with me. But what I did attempt to lug was pretty damn heavy-- but luckily, Bea and her brother Kenneth, daughters of the landlord, offered to give me a ride all the way to the beach! Sweet! ^_^ So I got off just near where Jimbo, Cris, and PsyJoe were waiting at Gate 14. Not long after, Vince arrived, followed by Stephanie, and then Katia.

Eva was on her way there, and I wanted to meet her at Safeway to get some stuff. Since Vince had his car, he was willing to drive, so we spent loads of time there getting all the stuff we wanted. Katia brought some cardboard boxes, and several people bought Safeway logs (they burn out pretty quick, we found). PsyJoe brought some cookies, and Katia had some soda that she brought down later... everything else, either I, Eva, or Vince bought. We had hot dogs, chips, sour cream (why is it so weird to have sour cream with Doritos? That's how I've always had them!), teddy grahams, and marshmallows to roast. Plus, Steph asked for a People magazine and some soda (which we had to go back to Safeway for; we'd forgotten it!).

Sadly, Rochelle, Crystal, Christine, and Taz couldn't make it-- though in the case of the latter dude, that was entirely my fault. I mean, we met up around 7:30-8pm, and, try as we might, our "line fire" (about 6 feet long of firewood and driftwood, all burning at once) didn't last very long. We decided to call it quits at 11:30, and Taz'd just gotten off work at 10:30, across town. ;_; I forgot to call him, so he had to turn around by the time Vince, myself, and the other guys were already in the car. I feel so horrible about that... ;_;

But, on the plus side, Amber, Fred, Mike, their two friends (one of them is named Laura, but I don't remember the guy's name), and Santos and Svetlana all showed up near the end! It was a blast with so many people there! I'd call it a successful bonfire, all in all. We didn't play any games (I brought Outburst and Chinese Checkers), but that's okay... it was the company that counted.

Steph, Eva, and Sean (yes, Sean showed up part of the way through, armed with yo-yos and all!) left a bit earlier, while me and the guys cleaned up; Katia had split a bit earlier at her Mom's behest, plus she had to go to Sonoma today...

It was a 100% dry bonfire, by the way. No alcohol, not as far as I know. I'm pretty proud of myself for that, I guess-- any time I've been to a "wet" bonfire, it's just ended up a disaster. Hell, me + people + alcohol = disaster. So I guess it was a good thing that before I left, Mom caught me looking for a thermos. She suggested I make Cocoa (I told her I wanted a big empty cup for sodas; one that I could seal... I was really going to try and take some Stolichnaya and Cran-Raspberry Juice), so I did. Yep, and the cocoa was good. And for once, I wasn't cold at all, and I didn't have any incidences of getting covered in sand, soaking wet, burnt, or with sand/smoke in my eyes.

Funny thing that happened-- Amber and I went up to the shore and were "teasing" the water-- walking up to the edge, and running off when it came close. PsyJoe eventually joined us, and when the water came up, it went sloshing all the way past his ankles! Plus, the place where we were standing was the only spot on the shore where the water had come up so far, so he blamed it on me-- the fire spirit! ^_^ Hehe.

After we got cleaned up, we emptied out our shoes and piled into Vince's car. Jimbo headed to Marc's place in Daly City, and while Vince and Cris went upstairs, PsyJoe and I played games on our phones. I got a new high score on Bejeweled-- 1100! :O But yeah, yesterday I was pretty out of it (and with good reason, too), so I didn't feel much like going up to socialize with Marc and Christal and them, even though I love 'em to bits and will miss them muchos much.

After Jimbo was PsyJoe; he'd given me a DVD of Equilibrium, which even I forgot I wanted, plus a FF8 necklace-- the one that Rinoa wears from Squall. ^_^ T'was very nice and thoughtful of him. Now I have my own FF necklace! I was next on the roster to be dropped off-- I got a very nice goodbye from Cris and Vince, and Cris told me that Bruce Campbell Night is still on for Tues. and Thursday. Tuesday is Michelle's Memorial, so I might (to cheer myself up) and I might not (because Mom'll be upset if I leave her by herself on That Day). Thursday is the day before I leave, and the day Dad'll be picking up most of my stuff to go to LA with him in the truck... so basically, we'll have to see. But I should go, 1) because I love Bruce Campbell, 2) because I'd love to spend one last night watching movies with my friends, and 3) because I don't like leaving loose ends hanging (you know what I mean).

Mom was already sound asleep by the time I got home (after 1:30am), so I decided to have myself a private sort of party. I grabbed a tumbler-glass, 70% Cran-Raspberry Juice (100%, so at least it was somewhat healthy!) and 30% Stolichnaya Vodka. Strong stuff, that. Hey, all you underage kids, don't do what I did! Not unless you have adult supervision and/or a damned good reason to get drunk...

Anyway, something entertaining:
1 - You think you wanna do something stupid, such as get drunk, even before you've had a drink. This is the result of many negative emotions piling on top of you, and the innate human desire to escape from them, even for a little while, by numbing them out. You know it doesn't make your problems go away, it just makes them fade out for a while. But it's still kinda fun.

2 - You make the drink, and you take the first sip. You can tell it's alcohol, because it's not any of that pansy fruit juice stuff. If you were smart and ate before hand, it'll take a while before you start to feel the effects, but simply drinking it takes your mind off things. You occupy yourself with something else, such as a freaky, psychological movie with a bishie and several gun battles.

3 - A haze of sorts starts to set in, and you find yourself either thinking of very strange things (I wonder if anyone's ever dyed their poodles pink? Just to see if they could?) or repetitive/redundant thoughts (wait, did he grab his gun and switch it, or did he switch his gun when he grabbed it?). Sometimes your thoughts will lead back to the source of your discomfort, in which case you'll either start throwing pillows around, laughing insanely, or crying like Niagara Falls. (FYI, I did none of the above, I just kind of lolled my head around until my neck cracked.)

4 - You've taken at least 3 more sips of the drink, despite the severe burning sensation that accompanies the pungent taste of alcohol. Even if it's mostly juice or a mixer, you can still taste it... But hey, it's just you, a blanket, and some pillows. No harm to be had. Only a good movie, and a good bout of silence with which to think. The movie is still understandable, but your limbs are beginning to feel like noodles, and your head feels a bit numb. You get a bit sleepy...

5 - You know you're flat out drunk when you get up to go to the bathroom, and you can't, no matter how hard you try, walk in a straight line. When you speak aloud, your voice sounds strange --different-- even to you. You can formulate understandable sentences, and even remember them the next day, but it still sounds weird. As long as you don't kiss any lamps or walk into any doors, you're still okay.

And finally, the inevitable HANGOVER. I really didn't eat a lot last night, which is why I probably got drunk so easily, but then again, I'm not exactly the Queen of Holding Her Liquor. Plus Stolichnaya is 80 Proof, so it's pretty strong. Not the strongest, but it's up there. Hangovers usually consist of a headache and more of that numb-limb feeling, plus a strong dislike for LIGHT. Light sucks. It blinds, it burns, and it annoys. Plus, sounds seem amplified no matter how far away or where they might be coming from. If you sleep it off for a few hours, it'll go away...

So here I am. Haven't done anything stupid. All my veins, limbs, hairs, and joints are intact. I have no fancy new scars or bruises, and I'm not busy doing idiotic things. Cheers to me. I really hope I can survive the next three days, let alone a life down in SoCal. I hope I can make new friends... I really do. I'll definitely join the CSUN Anime Club and convert them all to NorCal-iness for Cris-sama's eventual inspection. Hah. If they haven't seen "Tokyo Breakfast" and know what "Penny Arcade" is, I shall teachify them... ^_^

I still have a lot more packing to do, though. And I'm wondering what to do on the 20th (I mean, besides go to Land's End). For some reason I feel like gorging on pie.