A fictional way of living
Apr. 18th, 2004 10:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
azuriteThe way I see it, if you envision something happening --an event or circumstance-- your thoughts automatically negate that reality from ever taking place in your lifetime. At least, any time soon. This is why, in all the years since Freshman year of high school, I have not run into or seen Jason Cunningham ONCE, while my friends and other classmates have seen him several times.
I have a writer's mind, and as such, it can be highly creative-- and highly overactive. Not only do I envision the most wildly WAFFY or just generally weird scenarios, I envisions LOTS of them, so there's simply no chance in hell of what I want to happen HAPPENING ANY TIME SOON-- in any size, shape, or form.
So as much as I'd like to believe there's some granny out there who found my ID at the Metreon, and she's been a do-gooder all her life, and she's going to mail my ID back to me in a nice cream colored envelope-- well, there we go, I imagined it, therefore it can't happen.
In a situation with millions of endless possibilities, I can eliminate all the good stuff pretty quickly.
And everyone --even Mom, now-- doesn't hesitate to tell me that I have FUCKED UP ROYALLY (and here I was going to say at least I'm not turning into those whiners I hate that swear a lot... sorry!) by losing my ID, and people can steal my identity (someone tell me why you'd want to be a 99 lb. white girl who's not even allowed to get alcohol yet!?), mess up my credit (what credit!?), or something equally Bad and Permanently Damaging.
Anyway, I made an appointment for the soonest appointment at the DMV to renew my card... one month from now. And even then, it'll be a whole 60 days or more before I see a new id. That's *3* fu*cking months! How the hell am I going to get by without any ID? I won't be able to use my credit card; it says 'Please Ask for ID' on the back, and Mom is pretty insistent that most places won't accept my story, let alone another picture ID (my JCC card).
I'm trying to think back to the last place where I know for 100% that I had my card, but I can't remember. Maybe the movie theater, and I lost it trying to turn on house lights the other night when I ushered? Maybe HRC or something? I did use cash the entire week, though. And when I replaced everything in my wallet... I swore I put my ID behind my credit card, but maybe not. It wasn't in the living room anywhere, and not in any of my old wallets.
Wishing never does me any good, anyway. What are the chances that someone is going to find it and turn it in, let alone MAIL it to me? It's more likely that Mom and Jorge are right, and my identity will go down the drain. I'll be like one of those people in the Citibank Identity Theft commercials, and then I can laugh (bitterly) and say, "Hah! And here I have Citibank!" I suppose I should tell them tomorrow that a) I intend to switch to Washington Mutual as soon as I get an appropriate ID, and b) They better not let anyone tinker with my account.
Last night, as I said, I couldn't sleep. I stayed up till after 3am again, this time reading "Memoirs of a Geisha" with half a mind. It must have left quite the impression on me, because I vaguely recall having a really weird dream, but I can't remember what it was about. In the end, I decided to take one of my music boxes and listen to it slightly muffled (inside one of my fuzzy hats). It was playing "The Way We Were," and was a very appropriate song, all things considered, and very sad. I listened to it until the wind ran down... and I suppose about 20 minutes later I fell asleep.
And here we are. I look like crap, I feel like shit, and unless the Goddess is feeling particular merciful today, it looks like another long, boring day, probably dealing with managers bent on screwing me up, and co-workers who have no mind to hear me whine.
...
Damn.
I have a writer's mind, and as such, it can be highly creative-- and highly overactive. Not only do I envision the most wildly WAFFY or just generally weird scenarios, I envisions LOTS of them, so there's simply no chance in hell of what I want to happen HAPPENING ANY TIME SOON-- in any size, shape, or form.
So as much as I'd like to believe there's some granny out there who found my ID at the Metreon, and she's been a do-gooder all her life, and she's going to mail my ID back to me in a nice cream colored envelope-- well, there we go, I imagined it, therefore it can't happen.
In a situation with millions of endless possibilities, I can eliminate all the good stuff pretty quickly.
And everyone --even Mom, now-- doesn't hesitate to tell me that I have FUCKED UP ROYALLY (and here I was going to say at least I'm not turning into those whiners I hate that swear a lot... sorry!) by losing my ID, and people can steal my identity (someone tell me why you'd want to be a 99 lb. white girl who's not even allowed to get alcohol yet!?), mess up my credit (what credit!?), or something equally Bad and Permanently Damaging.
Anyway, I made an appointment for the soonest appointment at the DMV to renew my card... one month from now. And even then, it'll be a whole 60 days or more before I see a new id. That's *3* fu*cking months! How the hell am I going to get by without any ID? I won't be able to use my credit card; it says 'Please Ask for ID' on the back, and Mom is pretty insistent that most places won't accept my story, let alone another picture ID (my JCC card).
I'm trying to think back to the last place where I know for 100% that I had my card, but I can't remember. Maybe the movie theater, and I lost it trying to turn on house lights the other night when I ushered? Maybe HRC or something? I did use cash the entire week, though. And when I replaced everything in my wallet... I swore I put my ID behind my credit card, but maybe not. It wasn't in the living room anywhere, and not in any of my old wallets.
Wishing never does me any good, anyway. What are the chances that someone is going to find it and turn it in, let alone MAIL it to me? It's more likely that Mom and Jorge are right, and my identity will go down the drain. I'll be like one of those people in the Citibank Identity Theft commercials, and then I can laugh (bitterly) and say, "Hah! And here I have Citibank!" I suppose I should tell them tomorrow that a) I intend to switch to Washington Mutual as soon as I get an appropriate ID, and b) They better not let anyone tinker with my account.
Last night, as I said, I couldn't sleep. I stayed up till after 3am again, this time reading "Memoirs of a Geisha" with half a mind. It must have left quite the impression on me, because I vaguely recall having a really weird dream, but I can't remember what it was about. In the end, I decided to take one of my music boxes and listen to it slightly muffled (inside one of my fuzzy hats). It was playing "The Way We Were," and was a very appropriate song, all things considered, and very sad. I listened to it until the wind ran down... and I suppose about 20 minutes later I fell asleep.
And here we are. I look like crap, I feel like shit, and unless the Goddess is feeling particular merciful today, it looks like another long, boring day, probably dealing with managers bent on screwing me up, and co-workers who have no mind to hear me whine.
...
Damn.
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Date: 2004-04-18 10:28 pm (UTC)