Subway cookies are good, but...
Jun. 4th, 2003 10:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
azuriteI tell myself that it's always okay to have "low hopes" so that when good stuff happens, you're even more surprised, happier even. And when stuff DOESN'T go your way, you're not (that) disappointed. But still, it's hard to honestly believe that.
I was really hoping Lonnie would call today. To say he was coming tomorrow, to say congratulations, that he's sorry for not calling me like he promised, to say that he had an honest to god excuse. I know he lives on his own and he has to juggle work and school... and I'm sure that being suspended for a week didn't help him this close to finals and the end of the school term.
But he had time to hang out with Benji last week, and no time to call me...?
I guess I'm not ready to really just "have fun" and play the field. I don't think I want a SERIOUS committment, but I do want SOMETHING. I want promises to be kept, time to be spent with me, and important times in my life remembered. Kripa and the gang say I should stay on "freeze" and not contact him at all. It's a lot harder than it sounds. I mean, I'm tempted to call him and yell or be upset. Likewise, I'm tempted to just call and not say anything at all, or maybe just make sniffly noises into the phone. But that's desperate, pathetic, and power-giving-- also not my style.
It's strange how something bad can seem monumental when you have so many GOOD things going for you. I told my friends today about how upset and sad I was about the Lonnie deal... but how happy I was to have my dad -a teacher- coming to my graduation. He's never come to any of my graduations before, and I was always upset at him before, but now... ^_^ He's really coming. REALLY. Half of me wants to cry in happiness, because I feel like it's been forever since I've seen my dad, even though it's only been over a month.
I hung out with my friends almost all day today too-- I saw Amy (OMG, it's been so long! It was so good seeing her again, even if we didn't talk much. She's graduating from Lincoln tomorrow, too) with Kripa, Steph, Paul, and Michelle. I'm sorry, it's really hard to be nice to Michelle when she's just SO annoying. She practically echoes everything someone says, not to mention mimics what people do; she's not as stupid as she makes herself out to be though, so there's no secrets from her unless you make a serious point about it. Paul told me he doesn't like the way Michelle's all over him; it's no secret that she likes him, she even told him as much, but there's a bat's chance in water that he likes her back, especially considering a) he used to go with Kripa, and b) Michelle's moving away to NC anyhow. =} Is it wrong of me to be happy? Gah, I just want her to go away already...
We watched "Finding Nemo" today-- I didn't cry, didn't "mist" or tear. But it was cutesy and sad-- the kind of movie that should have been released the Friday before Father's Day IMHO. One of THOSE stories. But I still liked it, and I wouldn't mind seeing it again on Saturday with Rochelle and Eva. ^_^ After the movie I played some DDR-- Michelle tried to shadow me at first, and then play with me a while later (I was uberworn-out from trying to play Max 300... eheh, I failed, but I did get farther in the song than I thought I would) but she failed miserably. I tried to help her with the options, but she screwed up and ended up putting everything on stealth! -.- I knew I should have put her on Beginner Mode. When Paul played the final stage, "White Lovers" (a sick joke, since we're both white) with me, he passed it with a D! I was lazy and worn-out, so I only got a C, but previous songs boosted my overall grade. =} Still, I'm glad they have Extreme at the 1000, for only a buck, too!
Afterwards, we went to McDonalds... everyone wanted the Finding Nemo toys, and Amy got herself a little talking Nemo squirt gun. He was pretty cute, and somehow we got into talking about how big REAL clownfish were, and if whales had those little dangly things in the back of their throats (Kripa said they have tongues, so why not those dangly things...? Still, in the case of a whale, it wouldn't be very LITTLE). Lots of weird, random topics, as per usual. Amy was going to leave after that, as she had to go pick up some bus on Noriega, so the rest of us went to Kripa's house to hang out. I fell asleep for a while on the floor while everyone else just chilled, signed my panoramic pic, and read Kripa's many magazines. When I awoke sometime later, it felt like they'd been talking about me-- I heard weird comments about me, but I can't remember them well. Somehow we ended up playing "Telephone," and I heard some pretty weird stuff-- the topics were mostly sexy and such, and I was making commentary on how Steph and Michelle kept pressing Paul about a "relationship" with Theo (Theo's uberChristian) and making jokes-- all I said was "it's a fantasy of theirs, so next time Paul, bring a videotape!" but they took it the wrong way, and when we went to the park later, Steph was in a huffy mood-- she even walked way ahead of Paul, Kripa, and I when we went to Starbucks and pretty much ignored me. =P Toby came back later and played with us-- until 8:30, and then we parted ways.
Placed my order for the Anaheim choir portraits; they didn't do the "cash on delivery" thing like I thought they would. So there was a $10 late fee for not ordering within the first 22 days of the event (it's been 39 days) and the delivery time is 6 weeks! AUGH! I only ended up ordering the one Formal one, since Mr. Ulrich didn't want us to take Informals in the first place. Speaking of him (and other teachers), there's still a bunch of people I want to get to sign my yearbook; today I stuck around a while after getting my panpic while Crystal and Eva got their books signed by Mr. Ochi. I still want to see if I can snag siggies from...
* Mr. Sherrill
* Mr. Diesel
* Mrs. K
* Ms. Victoire (A MUST!)
* Mr. Z
* Mrs. Thompson
* Ms. Camajani
* Ms. Taylor (maybe)
* Ms. Sheinkopf (maybe)
* Mr. Ulrich (maybe?)
* Mr. Ishibashi (if he's not uberbusy)
* Ms. Kitchell
* Ms. Kassler
* Ms. Huddleston (maybe when I get my diploma tomorrow?)
So anyway, I want to be at school way earlier than I have to be, to get my candy lei and to sort everything like seating, meeting places and times, and the like out. Not to mention get my yearbook signed, and hopefully find J.Po in the band room so I can hand him the letter and run off. =P Maybe it's short notice and all, but I don't want to let summer just HAPPEN without me even trying to say anything to him. With that hope in mind, I might not be so upset about the silly Lonnie thing. Even my MOM thinks a "freeze" is the right thing to do. I was just so unsure and tempted to call, I had to ask people for advice.
The big plusses about tomorrow are the people coming: Joe, Vince, my mom, my dad, his girlfriend Kathy, Amber... I dunno who else, but it would sure be cool to see other people there! I've never had anyone there at my graduations before-- no one except my Mom (and my sister, at my elementary school graduation). So this will definitely be cool! Lots of picture taking! ^_^ I don't care about presents and stuff-- for the Presidio graduation today, there were all these weird guys selling stuffed bears and leis and the like, and they were a total ripoff! Flower leis die and get crushed and forgotten easily; bears and stuff are just sentimental hunks of junk. Give something meaningful and useful, if you feel guilty enough to give anything at all! Personally, I like cards (and checks, haha!) since I keep them in a scrapbook!
-.- My only two worries for this summer have nothing to do with guys, thankfully:
(1) I was looking through Kripa's CCSF papers for this Fall; it seems that in order to ADD classes, you need that stupid yellow slip that you use to make appointments with! @_@! I know I had mine at school, when I first tried to register at my scheduled time... and then when I brought it to the College Center-- but what have I done with it since then!? I have to call them before the 9th, when classes start! AUGH!
(2) I NEED A JOB. Plain and simple. Apparently Hot Topic's already opened, and Gable's is no longer hiring. I really need to get off my lazy ass, get to Richter's, and get that information about 'past references' down once and for all. To be honest, I'm glad I didn't apply for Hot Topic; as much as I love the store, I don't think I'd be cut out for working there-- they apparently have a "uniform" requirement of having 'rageous hair/piercings and the like, which I do NOT have. Yet. =P
*sigh* I'm sore from all that DDRing. I have dishes to do, and an alarm to set. And a stupid yellow paper to find!!
FINAL NOTE: I love my friends. EVERY ONE OF THEM, EVEN WHEN THEY'RE PRICKS! ^_^ *hugs and kisses*
I was really hoping Lonnie would call today. To say he was coming tomorrow, to say congratulations, that he's sorry for not calling me like he promised, to say that he had an honest to god excuse. I know he lives on his own and he has to juggle work and school... and I'm sure that being suspended for a week didn't help him this close to finals and the end of the school term.
But he had time to hang out with Benji last week, and no time to call me...?
I guess I'm not ready to really just "have fun" and play the field. I don't think I want a SERIOUS committment, but I do want SOMETHING. I want promises to be kept, time to be spent with me, and important times in my life remembered. Kripa and the gang say I should stay on "freeze" and not contact him at all. It's a lot harder than it sounds. I mean, I'm tempted to call him and yell or be upset. Likewise, I'm tempted to just call and not say anything at all, or maybe just make sniffly noises into the phone. But that's desperate, pathetic, and power-giving-- also not my style.
It's strange how something bad can seem monumental when you have so many GOOD things going for you. I told my friends today about how upset and sad I was about the Lonnie deal... but how happy I was to have my dad -a teacher- coming to my graduation. He's never come to any of my graduations before, and I was always upset at him before, but now... ^_^ He's really coming. REALLY. Half of me wants to cry in happiness, because I feel like it's been forever since I've seen my dad, even though it's only been over a month.
I hung out with my friends almost all day today too-- I saw Amy (OMG, it's been so long! It was so good seeing her again, even if we didn't talk much. She's graduating from Lincoln tomorrow, too) with Kripa, Steph, Paul, and Michelle. I'm sorry, it's really hard to be nice to Michelle when she's just SO annoying. She practically echoes everything someone says, not to mention mimics what people do; she's not as stupid as she makes herself out to be though, so there's no secrets from her unless you make a serious point about it. Paul told me he doesn't like the way Michelle's all over him; it's no secret that she likes him, she even told him as much, but there's a bat's chance in water that he likes her back, especially considering a) he used to go with Kripa, and b) Michelle's moving away to NC anyhow. =} Is it wrong of me to be happy? Gah, I just want her to go away already...
We watched "Finding Nemo" today-- I didn't cry, didn't "mist" or tear. But it was cutesy and sad-- the kind of movie that should have been released the Friday before Father's Day IMHO. One of THOSE stories. But I still liked it, and I wouldn't mind seeing it again on Saturday with Rochelle and Eva. ^_^ After the movie I played some DDR-- Michelle tried to shadow me at first, and then play with me a while later (I was uberworn-out from trying to play Max 300... eheh, I failed, but I did get farther in the song than I thought I would) but she failed miserably. I tried to help her with the options, but she screwed up and ended up putting everything on stealth! -.- I knew I should have put her on Beginner Mode. When Paul played the final stage, "White Lovers" (a sick joke, since we're both white) with me, he passed it with a D! I was lazy and worn-out, so I only got a C, but previous songs boosted my overall grade. =} Still, I'm glad they have Extreme at the 1000, for only a buck, too!
Afterwards, we went to McDonalds... everyone wanted the Finding Nemo toys, and Amy got herself a little talking Nemo squirt gun. He was pretty cute, and somehow we got into talking about how big REAL clownfish were, and if whales had those little dangly things in the back of their throats (Kripa said they have tongues, so why not those dangly things...? Still, in the case of a whale, it wouldn't be very LITTLE). Lots of weird, random topics, as per usual. Amy was going to leave after that, as she had to go pick up some bus on Noriega, so the rest of us went to Kripa's house to hang out. I fell asleep for a while on the floor while everyone else just chilled, signed my panoramic pic, and read Kripa's many magazines. When I awoke sometime later, it felt like they'd been talking about me-- I heard weird comments about me, but I can't remember them well. Somehow we ended up playing "Telephone," and I heard some pretty weird stuff-- the topics were mostly sexy and such, and I was making commentary on how Steph and Michelle kept pressing Paul about a "relationship" with Theo (Theo's uberChristian) and making jokes-- all I said was "it's a fantasy of theirs, so next time Paul, bring a videotape!" but they took it the wrong way, and when we went to the park later, Steph was in a huffy mood-- she even walked way ahead of Paul, Kripa, and I when we went to Starbucks and pretty much ignored me. =P Toby came back later and played with us-- until 8:30, and then we parted ways.
Placed my order for the Anaheim choir portraits; they didn't do the "cash on delivery" thing like I thought they would. So there was a $10 late fee for not ordering within the first 22 days of the event (it's been 39 days) and the delivery time is 6 weeks! AUGH! I only ended up ordering the one Formal one, since Mr. Ulrich didn't want us to take Informals in the first place. Speaking of him (and other teachers), there's still a bunch of people I want to get to sign my yearbook; today I stuck around a while after getting my panpic while Crystal and Eva got their books signed by Mr. Ochi. I still want to see if I can snag siggies from...
* Mr. Sherrill
* Mr. Diesel
* Mrs. K
* Ms. Victoire (A MUST!)
* Mr. Z
* Mrs. Thompson
* Ms. Camajani
* Ms. Taylor (maybe)
* Ms. Sheinkopf (maybe)
* Mr. Ulrich (maybe?)
* Mr. Ishibashi (if he's not uberbusy)
* Ms. Kitchell
* Ms. Kassler
* Ms. Huddleston (maybe when I get my diploma tomorrow?)
So anyway, I want to be at school way earlier than I have to be, to get my candy lei and to sort everything like seating, meeting places and times, and the like out. Not to mention get my yearbook signed, and hopefully find J.Po in the band room so I can hand him the letter and run off. =P Maybe it's short notice and all, but I don't want to let summer just HAPPEN without me even trying to say anything to him. With that hope in mind, I might not be so upset about the silly Lonnie thing. Even my MOM thinks a "freeze" is the right thing to do. I was just so unsure and tempted to call, I had to ask people for advice.
The big plusses about tomorrow are the people coming: Joe, Vince, my mom, my dad, his girlfriend Kathy, Amber... I dunno who else, but it would sure be cool to see other people there! I've never had anyone there at my graduations before-- no one except my Mom (and my sister, at my elementary school graduation). So this will definitely be cool! Lots of picture taking! ^_^ I don't care about presents and stuff-- for the Presidio graduation today, there were all these weird guys selling stuffed bears and leis and the like, and they were a total ripoff! Flower leis die and get crushed and forgotten easily; bears and stuff are just sentimental hunks of junk. Give something meaningful and useful, if you feel guilty enough to give anything at all! Personally, I like cards (and checks, haha!) since I keep them in a scrapbook!
-.- My only two worries for this summer have nothing to do with guys, thankfully:
(1) I was looking through Kripa's CCSF papers for this Fall; it seems that in order to ADD classes, you need that stupid yellow slip that you use to make appointments with! @_@! I know I had mine at school, when I first tried to register at my scheduled time... and then when I brought it to the College Center-- but what have I done with it since then!? I have to call them before the 9th, when classes start! AUGH!
(2) I NEED A JOB. Plain and simple. Apparently Hot Topic's already opened, and Gable's is no longer hiring. I really need to get off my lazy ass, get to Richter's, and get that information about 'past references' down once and for all. To be honest, I'm glad I didn't apply for Hot Topic; as much as I love the store, I don't think I'd be cut out for working there-- they apparently have a "uniform" requirement of having 'rageous hair/piercings and the like, which I do NOT have. Yet. =P
*sigh* I'm sore from all that DDRing. I have dishes to do, and an alarm to set. And a stupid yellow paper to find!!
FINAL NOTE: I love my friends. EVERY ONE OF THEM, EVEN WHEN THEY'RE PRICKS! ^_^ *hugs and kisses*
