azurite: (Default)
azurite ([personal profile] azurite) wrote 2006-06-08 07:58 pm (UTC)

I do worry about you, and that IS something I can control and you can't. You're my friend, so I'm allowed :P

Alcohol doesn't make the problem go away though, and if you haven't been eating the way you're supposed to, it will only fuck you up more AND YOU KNOW THAT. You're smarter than this.

And I don't mean to take offense against your sadness, but have the comfort of knowing that even if someone is no longer in your life the way they used to be, at least they are alive. There's a certain sense of security you get from that, regardless of whether or not you're "with" that person. I can't ever speak to my sister again, no ifs ands or buts about it. And it HURTS knowing that, and regretting things when someone can really, truly never come back is a pointless exercise. On the other hand, knowing that your relationship with someone has changed still can have a matter of hope in it - you can change, circumstances can change, and life will go on. You will stop regretting the things you could have said and done, because you can't change WHAT IS, just like you can't change when someone has died.

But don't trivialize death. Maybe it wouldn't matter as much to you if someone in your family died, but "death in family" -- seriously, I've hurt pretty bad with my breakups before, and they've been all kinds of nasty, but nothing -NOTHING- will ever fill that void in me where my sister used to be. She is gone and cannot come back, but there are always more friends and lovers out there that can help me get over a break up. That's what we're all here for you for, so please remember that. :)

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