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What Doesn't Kill You, Chapter 10 Review Replies
Even more review replies, taken directly from the page at Darkness Rising. These review replies would have appeared in Chapter 11. I don't include the actual reviews FOR SOME OF THEM; go to FFnet or MMorg and look at the Review History if you want to see them. If people start reading the fic from the beginning and reviewing for the earlier chapters, I'll update this (and the other) chapter page(s) with replies to them as I see fit.
These replies are new!!
Also, new format for replying to LONG reviews-- I'll post my replies in PLAIN TEXT font, with no italicization or bolding. They'll appear between paragraphs of long reviews!
Loreleisealgirl -- I'm not sure exactly what you were talking about by an "error in the fanfic," regarding Kaiba and, presumably, smiling? I don't think that quite qualifies as an error, per se, and by not mentioning the specific instance in the fic that drew your attention, I can't really change things. Perhaps you're talking about Kaiba, when he was drunk in Chapter 4, and, in this chapter, saw the video footage of him saying to Téa that he wanted her ability to smile. I'm well aware of the fact that Kaiba "smiled" when he was reunited with Mokuba at the end of the Big 5 RPG arc. However, it's not the same as Téa's "ability to smile" whenever she feels like it. What I'm trying to establish in WDKY is that people change over time, but it takes a long time, and a great deal of influence. Very few things short of Mokuba could make Kaiba smile genuinely, and what Kaiba was saying when he was drunk was that he wanted Téa's ability to smile at any time. It's not that he can't, it's that he's been bred not to.
michi-hikari -- AHH! @_@ must update soon! must know what happens!!
i have a kaiba ficcie too, with everyone else in the show (not everyone EVERYONE, but...) it's just randomness and humor. I was put up to it by my friends. nobody else wanted to write the story, so they made ME do it... T_T... It's called "A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning", under the filter YuGiOh.
O_o have you watched the latest episode of Waking the dragons? Yami goes evil! O_o I was screaming...kind of. It was very surprising. He looked cuter then, though, with red in his eyes. >_< don't hit me, ppol! just voicing my opinion there!
The first thing I want to say is you should explore your own voice. Never let your friends put you up to anything, even writing. Encouraging is one thing, but when you say "my friends made me do it" that translates to your heart not being in the fic. If it's something you really want to do or see through, don't start. On top of that, adapting a book for an anime or manga series is just plain wrong. There's a reason why "A Series of Unfortunate Events" is a book series about Klaus, Violet, and Sunny, and not Yugi, Téa, and Joey (or anyone else from Yu-Gi-Oh, for that matter). It might be a harsh generalization I'm making here, and one that I've even violated in the past, but I'm firm in it now.
Though I appreciate your praise of the fic, using the review board as a "message board" serves no purpose. Some people watch the dub anime; others don't. Some read the review board, others don't. For those that do, they don't need to see spoilers for the series that have nothing to do with the fic. And I don't need the added spam in my inbox. Next time you want to review the fic, please review MY fic, not advertise yours or gossip about the series. People can find information about both of those things elsewhere.
Kai-Seto -- hey, how r you? well, i'm confused lol. in an earlyer chapter when Kaiba was in jail, he had a room mate called Wheeler. I thought that maybe that was Joey's Dad, but now you say he is home waiting for Joey, but Joey dosn't care what his Father thinks any more. Well, i'm just asking, are they the same person or did you just mix things up, or is it just an other Wheeler? Well, this isn't a flame, its a question, Later Days =^_^=
Sorry about your confusion! But the reference in Chapter 9 was indeed a hint at Joey's dad. Some people might not be aware of this fact, but public drunkenness (to the point of being obscene) is cause for arrest-- but with a very low bail, or a fixed amount of jail time. Though I implied that "Wheeler" was well familiar with the police for being drunk in public, I never meant to imply he was there permanently. That's not what city or district jails are for-- long-term prisoners are kept at penitentaries and prisons.
In short: they are the same person. ^_~
Doma the Angel of Silence -- Azurite,
This is so cool! Oh, I love this so much! Nothing even comes close, and the best thing is the wondering what's going to happen next. I just never can tell!
You know I was thinking, if you printed this off and made it a book, it would be like the Encyclopaedia Britannica! Absolutely mondo TITANIC SIZE!
I can't tell you how much I want a new update of this!
ROCK ON AZURITE!
Doma the Angel of silence
P.S. Disclaimer: I am not on drugs (prescription or other wise), high on cafine, hyped on sugar or drunk as I post this review. I am a bit sleep deprived.
I'm glad you're still liking the story! I'm not sure whether I should apologize for its length or not, as people seem to have mixed opinions about it... but I don't think it'd be QUITE as long as the Encyclopedia Brittanica! Not yet, anyway... I hope you continue to enjoy the fic!
Randy-@Hornick -- I have completed the following story, from which you have made avaliable. To be a matter of fact I reread your story to make sure I haven't missed the slightest detail. I really enjoy your form of writting. You must have a great imagination to be able to combine your own thoughts and ideas with that of the animes actual storyline and details. I must give credit to you when I say you are one of the better authors I have reviewed. You are very well written. Please continue you're superve work effort I can't wait till your possible following chapters are redy for view you can bet I'll be one of the first to review.
Randy L-Westbrook (Hornick)
^^; Thanks for the review! I'm glad for every bit of praise and constructive criticism that I get, as it motivates me and encourages me to improve. I do try to combine a great deal of aspects of the show (themes like friendship, love, and faith) with my own story ideas... and as you'll see in later chapters, new versions of the anime seasons, with a fresh perspective and twist to events. I hope you continue reading and enjoying the fic!
Yukino-chan -- WOW...I mean WOW...I'm WOW!...This story...WOW...ITS WOW...::Slaps her self to get the rest out::
OH! sorry I mean this story have everything action,adventure,angst,lil lust,romance,ghost,fights,dancing,happines,sadnes,written very well(If I do say so my self),and just about everything a good story(meaning yours)should HAVE!...WOW!
P.S. Hope there's a Sequel!
Yukino-Chan-*
I do try to include "a little bit of everything" in WDKY. In that sense, it's rather hodgepodge, as if the two genres FFnet forced me to select really don't do it enough justice. I suppose that's because this fic is really "setting the stage" for the next grand adventure I have planned-- Circle of Seven, WDKY's sequel! So yes, there will be one! Look forward to it!
Amber Myst -- Hey, just ignore that last email I sent you...eh. Anyway, THIS FIC IS THE BEST YU-GI-OH I'VE SEEN IN...EVER! I love the way you portray so much emotion, written like a pro! And there are so many twists and turns my head spins! And an hundred and twenty pages long and for one chapter?!?!? Just thinking about it makes my head spin! Just update soon!
...Last email? I must have missed it. Anyhow, I'm quite flattered! Thanks for the very kind compliments! Obviously, because Yu-Gi-Oh is a shounen show, they don't focus so much on emotions as they do the duels. Obviously the characters have personalities and feelings, but we never go too indepth with them, which is probably why so many fangirls (myself included) feel they have such leeway with the series and its characters. My goal is to keep the characters recognizable and in-character, but able to grow and change based on a new set of circumstances (death, love, and so forth).
Hopefully your head hasn't spun too off-course...^^;
unknown -- throughout the whole story I kept thinking will they ever really get together? then in the end , you're still not sure. There is no closure at all. can't you do an alternate ending or something?
I've said for a long time that this fic will be 36 chapters long. As such, you can't expect me to rush things. I've said it once and I'll say it again and again: I'm trying to keep the characters in-character and changing as realistically as possible given their circumstances. I refuse to have Téa just jump into Seto's arms and have them screw like wild bunnies.
I have already planned the entirety of the story, and I'm not even halfway to "the end." But I am sure of what's going to happen when so far be it for you, my reader-in-the-dark, to tell me I'm not sure of what's going on.
The story is not completed, so there is no need for an alternate ending.
Depressed Pixie -- I demand a sequal ! V.kewl although I thought dat seto + tea shudda got it 2gether. Ya know wat I mean *snigers*
The story's not finished yet, so how can I write a sequel? As for Seto and Téa "getting together," don't worry-- future chapters will definitely fulfill that desire.
Jenny116cn -- OMG...I love tyour fanfic. It's so TIGHT! please update soon!
The only reason why I'm replying to this is because you used the word "tight." I haven't heard that used as a compliment since I was in middle school! *grin* Thanks for the compliment!
Darkstar71 -- Boy, that took some time to read, well really a couple of days to get it down to this last chapter. Your story put me, where I felt like I was in school being yelled at by the teachers to put my book up so I could learn in class instead of books. I really like the story and the real life you put in to it all the the from the start to the end. Great story.
*grin* I apologize if this ends up distracting you in school-- though heaven forbid you actually try to print out some of the later chapters, which are amazingly long, even for me...
I'm glad you pointed out what you like/appreciate about the story; I enjoy writing WDKY for the same reason I hope you like reading it-- I'm injecting real life situations into an otherwise magical, mythical world.
Saiya-jin Spice -- Hello, Azurite! How are you?
I am pleased to announce that I finally finished reading Part Ten: Separation, and then...and couldn’t be more ecstatic! I honestly printed the whole thing out (Well, under the conditions that I minimized the font to 8 and printed using “draft” format for the ink) and it took me days to read! I was sitting in Study Hall reading it and my friend who sits with me kept on asking: “What is that? That’s a story? ...Wait, a chapter? You seriously aren’t going to read that much are you??” Needless to say, I did, and I couldn’t be happier. This is the superior kind of fanfiction I’m always searching for but infrequently seem to find. Terrible grammar, OOC, and Mary-Sue plots seem to redundantly appear on , so it’s very refreshing to read something like this.
Thank you SO much for that compliment. It really means a lot to me that my effort is coming across to the readers... and if it ends up impressing those outside of the fanfiction world, even for something as silly as length, it makes me all the prouder. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I enjoyed the general angst this particular chapter portrayed, and couldn’t be more satisfied by the gradual pace you spread things out. Your personal way of writing the characters personalities and the way they interact, is excellent. The distinct scene that runs through my mind is the whole ordeal with Anzu getting drunk. Some may disagree because they think its OOC, but I couldn’t be gladder you had that occur. Anzu, although she’s normally optimistic and cheerful, IS human. If something horribly bad happens to her - the way Kaiba treated her and the way she thought her friends abandoned her, definitely fall into that category - she can’t continue going on with that facade of cheerfulness. You made her seem real, which is the point I want to get across. Like she was an actual girl I could know and meet. Through your writing, you gave her such a realistic personality that I found myself glued to your story and thinking about it all the more.
You hit the nail on the head. Call it silly, but I've always related to Anzu/Téa as I watched her in the show. I didn't understand why she was so hated. I sought out fics with her in them, I stumbled on a few rare S/A fics, and an obsession was born. Now here I am, with 120+ page chapters and ideas that won't stop flowing!
I draw the majority of my writing style from what I've experienced in life. I don't necessarily think that age = wisdom, but age does lend to experience, and experience is what sets the foundation for wisdom. It also doesn't matter to me if there's a 36-year-old out there with an English degree critiquing my work; knowledge is not wisdom, and a degree doesn't translate to much in the fanfiction world, where frankly, "nothing is sacred." (Though in my fics, I do hold the English language pretty up there, I'll be the first to excuse non-English words like "glomp" and "sweatdrop" from analyzing.)
Anyway, back to the subject at hand: I wrote Téa experiencing abandonment, loss of love, shock regarding the truth of her parents' death, and so on-- those are things very similar to what I've gone through. I tried to make that come through in the things that she said, thought, and did. I've gotten drunk for silly reasons, and if I tried to see myself (back then) in someone else's shoes (like Mai or Bakura), my story might not have differed all that much from Téa's. So if you think she's someone you could connect to, then I have accomplished what I set out to do. I never like using wooden characters, though I do admit that I have in the past (and Chieko rather continues to be one.)
Throughout the course of this story, Anzu has been through so much; more than some people experience in a lifetime. Her parents were murdered, she moves in with Kaiba Seto, she was haunted and nearly killed, Kaiba is sent to jail and she has to bail him out, and yet she kept on going. However, finally she let go and moved in with Mai, which leads to her getting drunk. All this turmoil is getting to her, and she becomes intoxicated to forget all her problems. She wants to live in a world of denial to escape the atrocious reality of her situation. Although people may say that Mazaki Anzu - Téa Gardner - would never get inebriated, it was because she did, it made her seem all the more realistic. Let me explain, because I know that came across awkwardly.
In this, you represented her strong personality flawlessly, and the DV8 scenes with her dancing and getting smashed are reactions a lot of people would have. If one has their heart broken so badly and think their best friends abandoned them, then yeah, it’s normal to do something that would help them forget. And alcohol is one of the easiest ways to forget pain. Anzu had a hard time coming to terms with her situation and just wanted to forget everything, fall out of love with Kaiba, and alcohol helped her do that. But the next day she would wake up with a painful reminder crashing into her that this was her reality, so she would go out again and get drunk in another endeavor to forget. It’s a cycle, and one that happens to so many people in life. That’s one of the reasons I say you made Anzu seem so realistic, instead of giving her the constant stereotypical “happy cheerleader” personality, you made her act in such a way that showed another side to her. You gave her dimensions, and a personality that made her all the more pragmatic.
Thanks for additional clarification and emphasis on your point; I appreciate it so much, I don't quite think I can forumulate proper words (how ironic). In any case, the majority of what I would have said in reply to this, I said up there. ^_~
I remember I was actually almost crying with the whole forlorn school scene with her. Your writing on that particular scene gave the reader an excellent picture of what was going on, and made them feel like they were in Anzu’s place. I can’t stress enough how much I love your interpretation of her character. I think Kazuki Takahashi himself would be jealous. :P
Now THAT is quite possibly the highest praise I've ever gotten. Heck knows if I could draw WDKY, I'd love to make it some massive doujinshi, but... well, my guy-drawing skills aren't quite up to snuff. Otherwise, I'd gladly collaborate with some talented artist to put a real picture behind WDKY, and truly make Kazuki Takahashi realize his fans aren't all young boys!
I also thought it was a great idea how you had it so that Kaiba saw the videos of what really happened to Anzu. During those past chapters when Gozaburo was haunting her, and Kaiba didn’t believe her, I couldn’t believe how unfair that was. I thought: “There has to be a way that he’ll believe her! He has to know what *really* happened!” And it was truly clever how you twisted it so Kaiba saw *exactly* what happened by watching those videos. I was very pleased you put that in, and his perspective on the occurrences. I also liked how you wrote Shizuka’s character; I got a laugh out of her slapping Kaiba! You have no idea what the mental image in my head looked like. Just thinking of Kaiba’s face...priceless!
In truth, I needed a way to have Kaiba "discover" the truth, and I simply had no way of doing it any other way. Call it the cheater's way out-- but then again, you would expect Kaiba to have security cameras everywhere, wouldn't you?
As for Serenity slapping Kaiba, I just wanted to drive home how much I believe Serenity isn't some airheaded girl who would (*snicker*) follow Kaiba around like a puppy, as she does in many Seto x Serenity fics. I personally think that she admires Téa and Mai a great deal, and their personalities (they've both stood up to guys on a number of occasions, Yugi, Joey, and Kaiba included) are likely to rub off on her. In WDKY, she's a minor character, but meant to be one with a great influence on Téa's decisions. She's one of the few friends Téa has, and as a result, they care for each other deeply. Piss Téa off and you piss Serenity off too. And it's never wise to get a Wheeler angry...
However, on another note, a comment one of your other reviewers made, I have to slightly agree with. Anzu is definitely not a Mary-Sue, but I thought it was a little supercilious and over the top, how a lot of the guys seemed to be infatuated her. The whole ordeal with Kaiba and Yuugi liking her - Yuugi actually admitting it, Kaiba not-so-sure what he’s feeling - is a given. And the whole thing with Bakura added a nice touch to the story, especially because Bakura thinks she’s somehow related to the past. However, when I found out that Jounouchi used to like her, and then the guys guarding the back of DV8 said that practically other guy was after her, that was a little extreme. I took into consideration that a lot of them are probably intoxicated and just wanted to hook up with someone, but...*just* with Anzu? ONLY her? There’s hundreds of other girls in the club who I’m sure are much more flashy. I also realize that she might be getting more attention than other girls if she’s dancing center stage -- especially if DV8 is like other bars that have an elevated center stage where all the dancers on it are noticeable -- but as much as I like Anzu, I really don’t believe she would stick out that much.
I did explain this to the original reviewer who pointed it out. My basis on the whole "guys and Téa" issue is this:
PAST: Joey had a crush on Téa. This was before he was friends with her, and if I really chose to go indepth with it, it would likely have been a superficial matter, based entirely on the fact that she looked nice, and dared to stand up to Joey (which is apparently something he likes, if Mai is any indication).
PRESENT: Yugi has had and continues to have a long-standing (unrequited) crush on Téa. At first, his shy personality prevented him from pursuing her, then his confusion with Yami/the Pharaoh did. In Duelist Kingdom, it became clearer that Yugi and Yami were two different people, and both Yugi and Téa were aware of this fact. In one point in the DK manga, Yugi even admitted to Téa that she knew she wanted to talk to "the other me," and he was going to switch with Yami- but Téa didn't let him. She cares too much for her friends to let them put themselves down like that. On top of that, I really don't think her crush solidified until mid Battle City-- and then it likely started to wane, because she had first-hand knowledge that the Pharaoh couldn't stay in the mortal realm (when she went on a "date" with him and met Isis for the first time).
FUTURE: Kaiba is slowly growing accustomed to the feelings he gets around Téa, though he doesn't necessarily know what they all are. As he attempts to explore them further, they fall deeper and deeper into love.
Bakura's "connection" with Téa is not meant to imply any romance. Though I did purposefully inject a bit of a Ryou x Téa x Bakura triangle in Chapter 10, it's not something I plan on making a focal point of WDKY. Bakura wants to know why he feels the way he does around Téa-- and never having experienced romantic love before, he doesn't even consider it as an option. Neither does Téa, because she's too aware of what Bakura can do to her, and how difficult it must be for Ryou to have that other presence within him. There's also the "inevitablity" factor, same as Yami/Yugi... eventually, all "dead" spirits will have to return to where they belong. Téa knows this, even when others won't admit it.
The guys at the club are, as you said, purely interested in Téa for her looks, and how "easy" she seems. Obviously, in conversation, facts are highly exaggerated. The gang guys at the back of the club are not meant to state "fic facts" as they are. But to them, 5 or 6 guys eyeing Téa might be enough to warrant what they said about guys going after her. I also happen to think that while Téa doesn't dress quite as exotically as Mai, her whole goal in DV8 was to stand out-- and she succeeded.
Like you mentioned somewhere within the chapter, Kaiba and the boys were having a difficult time finding her. Which, makes perfect sense. Afterall, she has simple brown, shoulder length haircut. A lot of club-goers have flamboyant hair and outfits, plus a lot of the girl’s cake on eccentric and vivid ways of doing their makeup. There are tons of people in the club, and Anzu really wouldn’t stand out to that extreme. I’m sure some guys would certainly notice her, especially if she was dancing center stage, but not enough so that Odagiri would say: “Hah. What Cigs means is that every guy who’s got a pair and isn’t otherwise attached has been tryin’ to get their paws all over her since she showed up. Half the Kings are head over heels for that chick, and can you blame ‘em? She’s got curves that -” I thought having all those guys want her like that was a little excessive. That particular factor didn’t seem too rational. Plus, have you ever seen the show “Real World” on MTV? The cast goes to clubs all the time, and has cameras following them, but none of them even get that extent of attention.
I wanted to give off the impression that Téa was hard to find not because of how she looked/dressed, but because Kaiba and the others had a poor vantage point. The top of DV8 is where the rafters and lights are positioned, along with constantly moving equipment like strobe lights and rotating balls. It would be very easy to look RIGHT at someone and not realize who they are. Truthfully, only Yugi would stand out in a crowd whether he wanted to or not. Téa's goal was to merely stand out on the dance floor; if she got attention, she succeeded.
As I said before, what Odagiri said is not meant to be taken as 100% fact-- guys do tend to exaggerate, too! ^_~
Also, in my personal opinion, I thought that flashback Jounouchi had of Hirutani was a little unnecessary. It further proved that another guy - Jounouchi - liked her and the scene was reminiscent of the manga. *Please* don’t take any offense to what I’m saying; I hope I didn’t come across as offensive. I just wanted to express a view on that certain part because I didn’t exactly agree with it.
The point of that scene was not to drive home Joey's former crush, but his former gang days, and his newfound overprotectiveness as friends. Once he became friends with Téa and Yugi, his crush waned. Joey was the first to realize Yugi had a crush on Téa, and that was probably what drove him to move on (I haven't covered that topic in WDKY yet). I wanted to set the stage for Hirutani's return and Joey's last run-in with them, and that could only be done with a flashback. What better way to coerce someone into a gang than to threaten their friends-- most of all a girl? Joey might be crude, but he's pretty chivalrous, and refuses to let anyone harm a girl if he has anything to say about it (I would actually say most of the guys in Yu-Gi-Oh are like that-- especially Yugi, Tristan, Kaiba, and to a certain degree, Duke).
Otherwise, I was extremely content with this chapter, and eagerly wait for the next one to come out! I wonder what will happen between Anzu and Kaiba now she’s moving back home. However, there’s obviously going to be a problem with her actually not living *in* the Kaiba Mansion, and I hope that the next chapter more romance will be introduced between the two. ^_^
I do hope you've kept on reading past this point (in the fic), and I apologize for how long it's taken me to reply to your review!
Before I end this review, I started a new C2 community on entitled: Peaches and Dancing: A Mazaki Anzu Fanfiction Archive - and I was wondering if you would be so kind as to either contribute or become a staff member? I love all your Yuugiou work, and would be honored if you could submit or join. I understand you’re busy already with tons of other things - not to mention Dragonfayth - (I joined by the way! ^_^) - but if you have the time, it’d be great. I want quality PRO-Anzu authors on there and you definitely fit the description. If you are interested at all, please email me at: Princesskazumi@ Thank you!
I would love to join, but as you can see above, I'm short one domain name for your email! I'll check it out on FFnet nonetheless, but if you want to send me another staff invite, I'll be glad to join. I'd love to hunt down some well-written Anzu-fics!
troubledgrl101 -- this is all and all a very good alot...well at least in my opinion... umm...i dont get the part where the ghosts are involved but then again ...i take way too long then normal ppl do to process things.^_^...i hope u hurry wit the other chapters..i cant wait^_~
l8er
Hopefully Chapter 9/10 "Restless Spirits" and "Separation, and then..." isn't still confusing you. I made clear at the start of the fic that it took place after Battle City, but the Noah/Virtual World arc DID NOT take place-- hence Gozaburo and Noah returning to the mortal plane as ghosts. I wanted a way to weave them in, and I couldn't do that if they were both digitized in the virtual world.
Darkhope -- Wow.. O_o This is... GREAT! I usually dont like or read Tea/-anyone.. but this is anexception! I like all the other couples though, the Joey/Mai scene was really cute! ^_^ Hope you update soon, I'll be waiting
I always love it when one of my fics becomes the exception to the rule! I really don't think Téa/Anzu is that bad of a character, and if I get drive that point home by writing fics with her as a strong star, then I'll do it!
KaibaChick20 -- Oh my gosh! I have read all of these sroties and I'm in love with them. I've set in front of my computer for hours reading this. You are such a good writed. You should have these published into books!! Well thats what I would do.
Unfortunately, doing so would be illegal-- putting my fics into books, that is. Unless I took them to Japan and had them turned into a doujinshi or novelization, and even then... it would be iffy. I'd never be able to import it or sell it in the U.S., that's for sure-- copyright laws and all. But it's a nice thought! Thanks for the compliments!
Jujubie (Teto4eva) -- Fab! Totally fabbity fab fab! I love your so in depth chapters! It really brings the story to life and draws you into the conflicts and situations. Great job! Can't wait till the next update!
Thanks! I always appreciate it when people tell me just what they like about what I'm doing; it lets me know I should continue doing it! I do want to draw you into the story and put you into the characters' shoes... if I can. Thanks again for your reviews and support!
Gryphaena -- Ack! I haven't reviewed in a while (i couldn't think of anything intelligent to write)! May I ask why you have neglected Mokuba during this chapter? Will he be so hyper next chapter(that Tea will return) and that is why you cut him out of this one? Anything you write for this novel of a fanfiction will be eagerly read.
^^;; Alas! Mokuba couldn't really be squeezed into this chapter. But he does have his claim to fame in Chapter 12, and again in Chapter 15. I hope you've read them and enjoyed them!
AllisonWalker -- That was an awesome story, but it didn't seem finished. What happens to them! What happens with Joey and Mai? I want to know! And what about Bakura? Is he gonna reck Kaiba's hopes? I want to know! Bye. ^_^
It's not finished-- it's supposed to be 36 chapters long! I hope people aren't getting the wrong impressions with my non-cliffhanger chapters... >_> Don't worry, the Joey x Mai problem will EVENTUALLY be resolved (after it gets turned on its head a few more times), and Bakura will be making a reappearance...
Obsidian Swirl 71 -- This, I have to say, is my favorite fanfic. The only advice I would give plotwise is too much anticipation can get tiresome (you aren't there yet don't worry). But maybe it's time to explore the possibilities of the story with a relationship actually happening. Of course realistically, (if it were real lol) it would cetainly take time for Seto to form a relationsip with anyone. And you have excellent rythm with your plot, so I'm sure you will manage magnificently. lol You are one of the best I've read at blending your dialect into the other aspects of the story, it's flawless, not always easy to do I know. Also, good work on the original characters; they enhance the story, which is what they are supposed to do, and still manage to be intriguing in their own right. Long chapters are good; I want there to be a lot of this story! The only thing I would add is a little bit of poetic imagery (like describing Seto's coats), but nothing overboard. The people are definitely what makes the story interesting. In conclusion lol, update at once. I NEED to know what happens!
Too much anticipation, eh? Well, as much as I hate comparing WDKY to a soap opera, that's probably the best way for me to relate why I have these perpetually unanswered questions and unresolved situations. Don't worry, 99% of the loopholes will be closed by fic's end. As for the other 1%, well, that's what a sequel is for...
*cough* I do try to blend experience and realistic life into the magical world of Yu-Gi-Oh, all while keeping characterization intact. Thanks again for the compliments!
DragonsamaX -- *squeals* Holy frozen Jeebus on a stick! *flails*
... Sorry.. Onto the sane part of this review. Yay, another chapter! It took over an hour to read, and it was an hour well spent. ^_^ Hurry up and write more please! I need to go make a Bakura voodoo dolly. Anyone have any pins? >.>
*teeheehee* I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter, despite its length... Bakura is so fun to write, even if people end up disliking him for what he does. But ooh, he's such a fantastic villain!
Solar Kitty -- This was a really awesome chapter! It made me laugh and cry too! Personally, I really loved the Téa and Ryou/Bakura scenes! Also, this has to be my absolute favourite part in the whole chapter:
A single moment could have lasted an eternity, and Kaiba spun around to face him. Had he been wearing a trench coat instead of his school uniform, it probably would have swooshed in that gravity-defying arc, like all of Kaiba's coats.
I love it because it's so true! Kaiba has awesome coats! *cough* Serenity is such a cool character. It sucks that she is rather underplayed in the anime, but hopefully she'll get some more limelight in this fic, like she has! It was really funny reading about her smacking Seto! Wow, I could ramble on and on about everything in this chapter because it was so good! I was even telling my friend how good it was and that she should read it!
I hope we get to see more Téa/Ryou actions! I think it would be interesting to see Seto's reaction if they got invovled (thanks to Bakura, the uber cool tomb robber!). It might also serve as a way to spark Seto's true feelings for Téa since he is struggling to figure out if he truly loves her or not. All he needs is that extra shove! Anyways, I am looking forward to the next chapter as always!
I love it when I can get a truly emotional reaction from my readers! It's definitely one of my higher aims in writing this fic. I'm glad you told me what you liked about Chapter 10! It's especially surprising to find it's a particular part, not an overall "thing," like it being S/T, or the implications of other ships. ^_^ Yay for specific examples!
And as I mentioned to other reviewers, I don't like Serenity paired off with Seto, but I can see her being very influenced by Téa and Mai, and as a result, standing up to Kaiba, just as they have. (I do appreciate the recs, too. Every little review with concrit or extra info helps me!)
In later chapters, Bakura isn't as present, but he is indeed a catalyst in the relationship between Seto and Téa. Expect to see him again soon.
AG the master -- arg! why can't they just get together already! this time lapse thing is driving me crazy! I can't wait for tea and seto to finally heal their relationship for good and just be happy together
Alas "the course of true love never did run smooth."
Nachzes-Black Rider -- Nachzes: NO! Not MORE sadness! NO! [wails]
Lieh: [backs away]
Nachzes: [sobbing] Not--once in 120-pages--did--Seto apologise. I thought--that's what he--meant to--do! [wails again] [sobs]
Kaiba: [backing away too]
Nachzes: Don't get me wrng, I loved the chapter, but...it's so damn SAD that he doesn't just SAY it, damit!
Haiiro: It's Kaiba here we're talking about, give him time.
Nachzes: [wails]
Kaiba and Lieh: [sneak out]
I have to laugh at this... merely because you caught me red-handed. I didn't WANT Kaiba to apologize for that, and you're entirely right in pointing out "it's Kaiba. Give him time." Thanks for the laugh!
Celtic Rune (Hioga-chan) -- Yays for an update! Gang fights in a bar ... can't say I saw that coming, but it worked.
You may want to find a phrase other than "smash drunk." After a while, that kinda got a repetitive and annoying.
Eagerly awaiting a new one.
I do love surprising people! As for the advice re: "smash drunk," thanks for that-- I didn't realize I was using it so much, and in later edits of the chapter, I hope I've cut down on my overusage of the expression. Thanks again!
unknown reviewer -- I have been waiting months for this chapter and I must admit it was worth it. This is what I like about your long chapters, the huge amount of material makes the wait worthwhile. This chapter had everything, one of the best so far. Kaiba now somewhat knows about his actions after the ball, Bakura is trying to cash in on his favor, and Kaiba and Joey now even have a small bit of respect for each other. I can't stress enough how much I love your work. I don't care if it takes months for the next chapter...I know it will be well worth the wait.
It means a lot to have you say you're not going to give up on me, as I'm sure countless others have-- what with my sporadic updates and my sometimes too-long, sometimes too-short chapters. And as I've said time and again, I make it a point to blend in as many genres and experiences as possible, to make it an enjoyable fic for everyone, including myself!
I hope you continue to read and enjoy!
Immortalbreath37 -- I am so glad that you finally posted, but you took way too much time in making us all wait...but needless to say I have just finished reading this post and you are an excellent writer and I really hope that you don't make us wait so long next time. Bakura is the perfect antagonist to use now. Awesome job.
I do thank you for the compliments, but I'm afraid the age-old excuse of "real life" is going to have to suffice here. Sometimes I'm inspired to write WDKY, sometimes I'm not. More often, I'll have whole chunks of the chapter written, but one or two crucial scenes which are unwritten or don't seem right to me. Until I get them done, or until I get the whole fic beta'd, I won't post-- it's my policy, and I'm sticking to it. If you have me on your Alert list, you'll be aware of updates, but I can't promise anything other than that.
Mamono -- Hazzah! I was able to sneak in before this place closes up for repairs!
Heh, I can't say this enough - this chapter was awesome. I mean, the part with the video tapes? Oy... I just wanted Seto to find out everything, but then again, not...
^^ And Bakura is evil in my eyes now. Hehehehe...
Anyhoo - not to reiterate myself a bazillion times - great, superb chapter - and:
*whines* They were supposed to *talk* not whatever that agreement was! ;-; You love teasing us...
Does it count when I reply to a review from my beta? Well I'm going to anyway, just because I know you'll probably re-read this all and laugh. I wanted to have Seto find out the truth about Gozaburo/Téa in an interesting way-- but Téa wouldn't tell him, and he'd be less likely to believe everything she said if she TOLD him anyway (she already tried, after all). So what better way than... video tapes? Besides, it's like solid evidence to Seto, and here we have "inexplicable phenomena" right before his eyes!
I do love evil!Bakura, among others... you haven't seen the last of him, I guarantee you that. And I *smirk* now at your review over the "agreement," if only because Seto x Téa have come so far since then...
blue-lavender-ice -- Finally, you updated the story on my birthday, thanks, but I would have appreciated it sooner than that. None the less, I'm very glad that you updated.
So, she's moving back in again huh? Brilliant twists with Bakura in play, I must say that you are quite evil but in a rather interesting way. I love whre the story is headed. I would have loved a bit more S/T interaction but, hey, It's all good.
Why did you have to screw up the video tape from the night of the ball? I would have loved to have seen (imagined) Kaiba's expression, even though I knew you were bound to do something like what you did do. Must you always torture people? Anyway, that Chieko girl is starting to slightly bug me, just because she seems to know something that she's not telling the others. J/M... I was hoping that you would get them together soon. Anyway, another brilliant, but obscenely long, chapter. Can't wait for the next one which hopefully will not take as long as this one did.
I do have the entire fic planned out, and that includes the parts people are apt to blame me as "screwing up." For what solace it might give you, I intended Kaiba to have a screwed up video for the night of the Ball. At that stage in the story, I don't think he would have been ready to find out he'd kissed Téa and upset her so badly; he already has done enough of that WITHOUT remembering the after-Ball incident, and needed more of a shove to talk to Téa at all.
I do love to torture my readers... ^_^ And that includes with obscenely-long chapters. I won't apologize for that, though...
As for the Mai/Joey relationship, it'll get more fleshed out as we go along. Mai is old enough to make decisions on the fly, and Joey is spontaneous like that naturally, so I wasn't going to put them in the spotlight and have them "talk" anyway. As Mai would say "less talk, more action."
dragontamer101 -- For some reason I find Seto being called a nimrod by Joey ridiculously funny...
Anyway, this was a hell of a long chapter. I was torn between laughing and crying through the whole thing.
Seems that things are't really resolved yet between Tea and Seto but it's a start, besides, I guess if was then you wouldn't be able to throw Bakura into the mix.
I'll be looking out for the next update.
*grin* I don't think Kaiba and Joey are really the types to "reuse" insults, anyway. For some reason, I could hear Joey in my mind calling Kaiba a nimrod when I wrote that scene...
As with other reviewers, I'm glad I sparked an emotional reaction in you-- it's my very intention to do just that! Of course not everything is going to get resolved-- all things take time. I hope you've read up to the latest additions and are still enjoying the fic!
Cocoa1331 -- I hate MAI, but I love JOEY and he better be sleepig on the sofa.Why? Because he is a MINOR(?), and she is 24 going on 25 and I don't care if this is fake he's still young, I WAS fine with this chapter UNTILL it got to THAT part.Up-date soon please.
Frankly, I don't care who you love or hate and why. As silly as it is for me to say, this is my fic, and I believe in characterizing everyone as appropriately as I deem fit (and true to their personalities as set in the anime/manga) given their circumstances. I happen to like Mai a great deal, and I like her relationship with Joey (Polarshipping) just as much. If you're uncomfortable with that, then don't read the story: simple as that.
As for the fic-- you're right, it is "fake." Accept it as fiction and move on. By the way, it takes place in JAPAN, where they don't have the same laws as they do here. Short of going into a legal rant about what constites consent in a sexual relationship with a minor, I'm going to state flat out-- Joey and Mai slept together. (As in, HAD SEX.) The fic is rated R (M+) for a reason-- and again, if you can't take the heat, get out of the fireplace. This fic and its review board is no place for minors or people who can't handle real world situations and relationships, no matter what their form.
Svelte Rose -- Ack, before I start spewing how much I loved this chapter, I just needed to point out one thing that got me confused (which I'm sure someone else has already pointed out ^_^;;).
The day Téa chose to go back to school was a Monday, wasn't it? Because she'd talked about how she'd just putzed around Mai's apartment on Sunday and now that it was Monday, she found out that she didn't have a uniform. (Ie: "And now it was early Monday morning, and Téa was busy digging through her now-dry duffle bag, muttering incomprehensible things under her breath.")
Then in class: "Oh, Téa," Chieko frowned sadly, "I didn't get a chance to tell you! Yesterday while you were absent, Miss Ninomiya assigned us a project. We have to work in pairs."
Okay enough of that, now of my gushing and worshipping of this wonderful fic! First, I am so absolutely confused as to whom I want Téa to end up with. Ultimately, I know she'll probably end up with Kaiba or be on good terms with him at least but now, with Ryou in the picture - I can't help but cheer on "Ghostie" also! XD
But with all the little innuendos and foreshadowing, we, the readers, know that the same thing has probably happened in their past back in Atemu's time - Priest Seto and the Tomb Robber Bakura fighting over a girl who disappeared from their history but yet, had enough influence over thier lives for it to resurface again in the present.
And while we all cheered for the fact that Seto and Téa may have finally 'talked', I know that I was absolute refreshed with the fact that instead of a 'happy-ending' chapter where Téa goes back to living with him and everything, there are still set boundaries. Instead of choosing to live in the room that she used to, she's going to be living with the servants - in the same house but still out of reach for Seto.
A happy ending would've made us content with the chapter but with an ending like that and Bakura now raging mad knowing that Kaiba had gotten to her first, it just makes us want for more!
Which is exactly how it should be done.
Ah! Thanks for catching that error-- now I'm using a high-tech system of calendars and highlighted colors to make sure I don't flub like that. I revised that portion of the fic to reflect that Téa's absence was actually on a Monday, and she returned on a Tuesday. Japanese schools often have half-days on Saturday, but Téa missed that class too. I think the last day she was in school was Friday, and then she cut out before lunch.
Though the fic is unabashedly Seto x Téa, I do love to toss implications of others in there. It tends to piss some people off, as they don't think she's all that marketable-- but it's just implications, not actual relationships, that I'm teasing with here. Joey might have had a crush on Téa in the past, but he's in love with Mai now; Yugi might still be crushing on her, but he knows it'll never go anywhere with Kaiba in the picture; Bakura knows he has some sort of weird connection with Téa, and so he'll push out Ryou to the point of wearing his host down-- but it's not exactly a "love" so much as an "obsession."
So cheer everyone on!
You're also being quite devious and seeing through some of my plot points, but I won't say on what or how. ^_~ You're good, Svelte! Perhaps TOO good...
I'm also glad you agree with my ending-- it is meant to be a twist, but not a cliffhanger, and it was "meant to be" that way. Thanks! *tears up* It means a lot.
X_X I just finished re-organizing my emails with old reviews in them, so any other pertinent reviews I find will be added to their respective Review Reply page shortly. Some reviewers also replied to early chapters due to FFnet errors in the review system; I'll try and move those reviews to the right place. It might also take me a bit before I copy the contents of all of these to Darkness Rising; as a rule, my site needs an overhaul and probably won't get one until summer. Sorry!
These replies are new!!
Also, new format for replying to LONG reviews-- I'll post my replies in PLAIN TEXT font, with no italicization or bolding. They'll appear between paragraphs of long reviews!
Loreleisealgirl -- I'm not sure exactly what you were talking about by an "error in the fanfic," regarding Kaiba and, presumably, smiling? I don't think that quite qualifies as an error, per se, and by not mentioning the specific instance in the fic that drew your attention, I can't really change things. Perhaps you're talking about Kaiba, when he was drunk in Chapter 4, and, in this chapter, saw the video footage of him saying to Téa that he wanted her ability to smile. I'm well aware of the fact that Kaiba "smiled" when he was reunited with Mokuba at the end of the Big 5 RPG arc. However, it's not the same as Téa's "ability to smile" whenever she feels like it. What I'm trying to establish in WDKY is that people change over time, but it takes a long time, and a great deal of influence. Very few things short of Mokuba could make Kaiba smile genuinely, and what Kaiba was saying when he was drunk was that he wanted Téa's ability to smile at any time. It's not that he can't, it's that he's been bred not to.
michi-hikari -- AHH! @_@ must update soon! must know what happens!!
i have a kaiba ficcie too, with everyone else in the show (not everyone EVERYONE, but...) it's just randomness and humor. I was put up to it by my friends. nobody else wanted to write the story, so they made ME do it... T_T... It's called "A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning", under the filter YuGiOh.
O_o have you watched the latest episode of Waking the dragons? Yami goes evil! O_o I was screaming...kind of. It was very surprising. He looked cuter then, though, with red in his eyes. >_< don't hit me, ppol! just voicing my opinion there!
The first thing I want to say is you should explore your own voice. Never let your friends put you up to anything, even writing. Encouraging is one thing, but when you say "my friends made me do it" that translates to your heart not being in the fic. If it's something you really want to do or see through, don't start. On top of that, adapting a book for an anime or manga series is just plain wrong. There's a reason why "A Series of Unfortunate Events" is a book series about Klaus, Violet, and Sunny, and not Yugi, Téa, and Joey (or anyone else from Yu-Gi-Oh, for that matter). It might be a harsh generalization I'm making here, and one that I've even violated in the past, but I'm firm in it now.
Though I appreciate your praise of the fic, using the review board as a "message board" serves no purpose. Some people watch the dub anime; others don't. Some read the review board, others don't. For those that do, they don't need to see spoilers for the series that have nothing to do with the fic. And I don't need the added spam in my inbox. Next time you want to review the fic, please review MY fic, not advertise yours or gossip about the series. People can find information about both of those things elsewhere.
Kai-Seto -- hey, how r you? well, i'm confused lol. in an earlyer chapter when Kaiba was in jail, he had a room mate called Wheeler. I thought that maybe that was Joey's Dad, but now you say he is home waiting for Joey, but Joey dosn't care what his Father thinks any more. Well, i'm just asking, are they the same person or did you just mix things up, or is it just an other Wheeler? Well, this isn't a flame, its a question, Later Days =^_^=
Sorry about your confusion! But the reference in Chapter 9 was indeed a hint at Joey's dad. Some people might not be aware of this fact, but public drunkenness (to the point of being obscene) is cause for arrest-- but with a very low bail, or a fixed amount of jail time. Though I implied that "Wheeler" was well familiar with the police for being drunk in public, I never meant to imply he was there permanently. That's not what city or district jails are for-- long-term prisoners are kept at penitentaries and prisons.
In short: they are the same person. ^_~
Doma the Angel of Silence -- Azurite,
This is so cool! Oh, I love this so much! Nothing even comes close, and the best thing is the wondering what's going to happen next. I just never can tell!
You know I was thinking, if you printed this off and made it a book, it would be like the Encyclopaedia Britannica! Absolutely mondo TITANIC SIZE!
I can't tell you how much I want a new update of this!
ROCK ON AZURITE!
Doma the Angel of silence
P.S. Disclaimer: I am not on drugs (prescription or other wise), high on cafine, hyped on sugar or drunk as I post this review. I am a bit sleep deprived.
I'm glad you're still liking the story! I'm not sure whether I should apologize for its length or not, as people seem to have mixed opinions about it... but I don't think it'd be QUITE as long as the Encyclopedia Brittanica! Not yet, anyway... I hope you continue to enjoy the fic!
Randy-@Hornick -- I have completed the following story, from which you have made avaliable. To be a matter of fact I reread your story to make sure I haven't missed the slightest detail. I really enjoy your form of writting. You must have a great imagination to be able to combine your own thoughts and ideas with that of the animes actual storyline and details. I must give credit to you when I say you are one of the better authors I have reviewed. You are very well written. Please continue you're superve work effort I can't wait till your possible following chapters are redy for view you can bet I'll be one of the first to review.
Randy L-Westbrook (Hornick)
^^; Thanks for the review! I'm glad for every bit of praise and constructive criticism that I get, as it motivates me and encourages me to improve. I do try to combine a great deal of aspects of the show (themes like friendship, love, and faith) with my own story ideas... and as you'll see in later chapters, new versions of the anime seasons, with a fresh perspective and twist to events. I hope you continue reading and enjoying the fic!
Yukino-chan -- WOW...I mean WOW...I'm WOW!...This story...WOW...ITS WOW...::Slaps her self to get the rest out::
OH! sorry I mean this story have everything action,adventure,angst,lil lust,romance,ghost,fights,dancing,happines,sadnes,written very well(If I do say so my self),and just about everything a good story(meaning yours)should HAVE!...WOW!
P.S. Hope there's a Sequel!
Yukino-Chan-*
I do try to include "a little bit of everything" in WDKY. In that sense, it's rather hodgepodge, as if the two genres FFnet forced me to select really don't do it enough justice. I suppose that's because this fic is really "setting the stage" for the next grand adventure I have planned-- Circle of Seven, WDKY's sequel! So yes, there will be one! Look forward to it!
Amber Myst -- Hey, just ignore that last email I sent you...eh. Anyway, THIS FIC IS THE BEST YU-GI-OH I'VE SEEN IN...EVER! I love the way you portray so much emotion, written like a pro! And there are so many twists and turns my head spins! And an hundred and twenty pages long and for one chapter?!?!? Just thinking about it makes my head spin! Just update soon!
...Last email? I must have missed it. Anyhow, I'm quite flattered! Thanks for the very kind compliments! Obviously, because Yu-Gi-Oh is a shounen show, they don't focus so much on emotions as they do the duels. Obviously the characters have personalities and feelings, but we never go too indepth with them, which is probably why so many fangirls (myself included) feel they have such leeway with the series and its characters. My goal is to keep the characters recognizable and in-character, but able to grow and change based on a new set of circumstances (death, love, and so forth).
Hopefully your head hasn't spun too off-course...^^;
unknown -- throughout the whole story I kept thinking will they ever really get together? then in the end , you're still not sure. There is no closure at all. can't you do an alternate ending or something?
I've said for a long time that this fic will be 36 chapters long. As such, you can't expect me to rush things. I've said it once and I'll say it again and again: I'm trying to keep the characters in-character and changing as realistically as possible given their circumstances. I refuse to have Téa just jump into Seto's arms and have them screw like wild bunnies.
I have already planned the entirety of the story, and I'm not even halfway to "the end." But I am sure of what's going to happen when so far be it for you, my reader-in-the-dark, to tell me I'm not sure of what's going on.
The story is not completed, so there is no need for an alternate ending.
Depressed Pixie -- I demand a sequal ! V.kewl although I thought dat seto + tea shudda got it 2gether. Ya know wat I mean *snigers*
The story's not finished yet, so how can I write a sequel? As for Seto and Téa "getting together," don't worry-- future chapters will definitely fulfill that desire.
Jenny116cn -- OMG...I love tyour fanfic. It's so TIGHT! please update soon!
The only reason why I'm replying to this is because you used the word "tight." I haven't heard that used as a compliment since I was in middle school! *grin* Thanks for the compliment!
Darkstar71 -- Boy, that took some time to read, well really a couple of days to get it down to this last chapter. Your story put me, where I felt like I was in school being yelled at by the teachers to put my book up so I could learn in class instead of books. I really like the story and the real life you put in to it all the the from the start to the end. Great story.
*grin* I apologize if this ends up distracting you in school-- though heaven forbid you actually try to print out some of the later chapters, which are amazingly long, even for me...
I'm glad you pointed out what you like/appreciate about the story; I enjoy writing WDKY for the same reason I hope you like reading it-- I'm injecting real life situations into an otherwise magical, mythical world.
Saiya-jin Spice -- Hello, Azurite! How are you?
I am pleased to announce that I finally finished reading Part Ten: Separation, and then...and couldn’t be more ecstatic! I honestly printed the whole thing out (Well, under the conditions that I minimized the font to 8 and printed using “draft” format for the ink) and it took me days to read! I was sitting in Study Hall reading it and my friend who sits with me kept on asking: “What is that? That’s a story? ...Wait, a chapter? You seriously aren’t going to read that much are you??” Needless to say, I did, and I couldn’t be happier. This is the superior kind of fanfiction I’m always searching for but infrequently seem to find. Terrible grammar, OOC, and Mary-Sue plots seem to redundantly appear on , so it’s very refreshing to read something like this.
Thank you SO much for that compliment. It really means a lot to me that my effort is coming across to the readers... and if it ends up impressing those outside of the fanfiction world, even for something as silly as length, it makes me all the prouder. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I enjoyed the general angst this particular chapter portrayed, and couldn’t be more satisfied by the gradual pace you spread things out. Your personal way of writing the characters personalities and the way they interact, is excellent. The distinct scene that runs through my mind is the whole ordeal with Anzu getting drunk. Some may disagree because they think its OOC, but I couldn’t be gladder you had that occur. Anzu, although she’s normally optimistic and cheerful, IS human. If something horribly bad happens to her - the way Kaiba treated her and the way she thought her friends abandoned her, definitely fall into that category - she can’t continue going on with that facade of cheerfulness. You made her seem real, which is the point I want to get across. Like she was an actual girl I could know and meet. Through your writing, you gave her such a realistic personality that I found myself glued to your story and thinking about it all the more.
You hit the nail on the head. Call it silly, but I've always related to Anzu/Téa as I watched her in the show. I didn't understand why she was so hated. I sought out fics with her in them, I stumbled on a few rare S/A fics, and an obsession was born. Now here I am, with 120+ page chapters and ideas that won't stop flowing!
I draw the majority of my writing style from what I've experienced in life. I don't necessarily think that age = wisdom, but age does lend to experience, and experience is what sets the foundation for wisdom. It also doesn't matter to me if there's a 36-year-old out there with an English degree critiquing my work; knowledge is not wisdom, and a degree doesn't translate to much in the fanfiction world, where frankly, "nothing is sacred." (Though in my fics, I do hold the English language pretty up there, I'll be the first to excuse non-English words like "glomp" and "sweatdrop" from analyzing.)
Anyway, back to the subject at hand: I wrote Téa experiencing abandonment, loss of love, shock regarding the truth of her parents' death, and so on-- those are things very similar to what I've gone through. I tried to make that come through in the things that she said, thought, and did. I've gotten drunk for silly reasons, and if I tried to see myself (back then) in someone else's shoes (like Mai or Bakura), my story might not have differed all that much from Téa's. So if you think she's someone you could connect to, then I have accomplished what I set out to do. I never like using wooden characters, though I do admit that I have in the past (and Chieko rather continues to be one.)
Throughout the course of this story, Anzu has been through so much; more than some people experience in a lifetime. Her parents were murdered, she moves in with Kaiba Seto, she was haunted and nearly killed, Kaiba is sent to jail and she has to bail him out, and yet she kept on going. However, finally she let go and moved in with Mai, which leads to her getting drunk. All this turmoil is getting to her, and she becomes intoxicated to forget all her problems. She wants to live in a world of denial to escape the atrocious reality of her situation. Although people may say that Mazaki Anzu - Téa Gardner - would never get inebriated, it was because she did, it made her seem all the more realistic. Let me explain, because I know that came across awkwardly.
In this, you represented her strong personality flawlessly, and the DV8 scenes with her dancing and getting smashed are reactions a lot of people would have. If one has their heart broken so badly and think their best friends abandoned them, then yeah, it’s normal to do something that would help them forget. And alcohol is one of the easiest ways to forget pain. Anzu had a hard time coming to terms with her situation and just wanted to forget everything, fall out of love with Kaiba, and alcohol helped her do that. But the next day she would wake up with a painful reminder crashing into her that this was her reality, so she would go out again and get drunk in another endeavor to forget. It’s a cycle, and one that happens to so many people in life. That’s one of the reasons I say you made Anzu seem so realistic, instead of giving her the constant stereotypical “happy cheerleader” personality, you made her act in such a way that showed another side to her. You gave her dimensions, and a personality that made her all the more pragmatic.
Thanks for additional clarification and emphasis on your point; I appreciate it so much, I don't quite think I can forumulate proper words (how ironic). In any case, the majority of what I would have said in reply to this, I said up there. ^_~
I remember I was actually almost crying with the whole forlorn school scene with her. Your writing on that particular scene gave the reader an excellent picture of what was going on, and made them feel like they were in Anzu’s place. I can’t stress enough how much I love your interpretation of her character. I think Kazuki Takahashi himself would be jealous. :P
Now THAT is quite possibly the highest praise I've ever gotten. Heck knows if I could draw WDKY, I'd love to make it some massive doujinshi, but... well, my guy-drawing skills aren't quite up to snuff. Otherwise, I'd gladly collaborate with some talented artist to put a real picture behind WDKY, and truly make Kazuki Takahashi realize his fans aren't all young boys!
I also thought it was a great idea how you had it so that Kaiba saw the videos of what really happened to Anzu. During those past chapters when Gozaburo was haunting her, and Kaiba didn’t believe her, I couldn’t believe how unfair that was. I thought: “There has to be a way that he’ll believe her! He has to know what *really* happened!” And it was truly clever how you twisted it so Kaiba saw *exactly* what happened by watching those videos. I was very pleased you put that in, and his perspective on the occurrences. I also liked how you wrote Shizuka’s character; I got a laugh out of her slapping Kaiba! You have no idea what the mental image in my head looked like. Just thinking of Kaiba’s face...priceless!
In truth, I needed a way to have Kaiba "discover" the truth, and I simply had no way of doing it any other way. Call it the cheater's way out-- but then again, you would expect Kaiba to have security cameras everywhere, wouldn't you?
As for Serenity slapping Kaiba, I just wanted to drive home how much I believe Serenity isn't some airheaded girl who would (*snicker*) follow Kaiba around like a puppy, as she does in many Seto x Serenity fics. I personally think that she admires Téa and Mai a great deal, and their personalities (they've both stood up to guys on a number of occasions, Yugi, Joey, and Kaiba included) are likely to rub off on her. In WDKY, she's a minor character, but meant to be one with a great influence on Téa's decisions. She's one of the few friends Téa has, and as a result, they care for each other deeply. Piss Téa off and you piss Serenity off too. And it's never wise to get a Wheeler angry...
However, on another note, a comment one of your other reviewers made, I have to slightly agree with. Anzu is definitely not a Mary-Sue, but I thought it was a little supercilious and over the top, how a lot of the guys seemed to be infatuated her. The whole ordeal with Kaiba and Yuugi liking her - Yuugi actually admitting it, Kaiba not-so-sure what he’s feeling - is a given. And the whole thing with Bakura added a nice touch to the story, especially because Bakura thinks she’s somehow related to the past. However, when I found out that Jounouchi used to like her, and then the guys guarding the back of DV8 said that practically other guy was after her, that was a little extreme. I took into consideration that a lot of them are probably intoxicated and just wanted to hook up with someone, but...*just* with Anzu? ONLY her? There’s hundreds of other girls in the club who I’m sure are much more flashy. I also realize that she might be getting more attention than other girls if she’s dancing center stage -- especially if DV8 is like other bars that have an elevated center stage where all the dancers on it are noticeable -- but as much as I like Anzu, I really don’t believe she would stick out that much.
I did explain this to the original reviewer who pointed it out. My basis on the whole "guys and Téa" issue is this:
PAST: Joey had a crush on Téa. This was before he was friends with her, and if I really chose to go indepth with it, it would likely have been a superficial matter, based entirely on the fact that she looked nice, and dared to stand up to Joey (which is apparently something he likes, if Mai is any indication).
PRESENT: Yugi has had and continues to have a long-standing (unrequited) crush on Téa. At first, his shy personality prevented him from pursuing her, then his confusion with Yami/the Pharaoh did. In Duelist Kingdom, it became clearer that Yugi and Yami were two different people, and both Yugi and Téa were aware of this fact. In one point in the DK manga, Yugi even admitted to Téa that she knew she wanted to talk to "the other me," and he was going to switch with Yami- but Téa didn't let him. She cares too much for her friends to let them put themselves down like that. On top of that, I really don't think her crush solidified until mid Battle City-- and then it likely started to wane, because she had first-hand knowledge that the Pharaoh couldn't stay in the mortal realm (when she went on a "date" with him and met Isis for the first time).
FUTURE: Kaiba is slowly growing accustomed to the feelings he gets around Téa, though he doesn't necessarily know what they all are. As he attempts to explore them further, they fall deeper and deeper into love.
Bakura's "connection" with Téa is not meant to imply any romance. Though I did purposefully inject a bit of a Ryou x Téa x Bakura triangle in Chapter 10, it's not something I plan on making a focal point of WDKY. Bakura wants to know why he feels the way he does around Téa-- and never having experienced romantic love before, he doesn't even consider it as an option. Neither does Téa, because she's too aware of what Bakura can do to her, and how difficult it must be for Ryou to have that other presence within him. There's also the "inevitablity" factor, same as Yami/Yugi... eventually, all "dead" spirits will have to return to where they belong. Téa knows this, even when others won't admit it.
The guys at the club are, as you said, purely interested in Téa for her looks, and how "easy" she seems. Obviously, in conversation, facts are highly exaggerated. The gang guys at the back of the club are not meant to state "fic facts" as they are. But to them, 5 or 6 guys eyeing Téa might be enough to warrant what they said about guys going after her. I also happen to think that while Téa doesn't dress quite as exotically as Mai, her whole goal in DV8 was to stand out-- and she succeeded.
Like you mentioned somewhere within the chapter, Kaiba and the boys were having a difficult time finding her. Which, makes perfect sense. Afterall, she has simple brown, shoulder length haircut. A lot of club-goers have flamboyant hair and outfits, plus a lot of the girl’s cake on eccentric and vivid ways of doing their makeup. There are tons of people in the club, and Anzu really wouldn’t stand out to that extreme. I’m sure some guys would certainly notice her, especially if she was dancing center stage, but not enough so that Odagiri would say: “Hah. What Cigs means is that every guy who’s got a pair and isn’t otherwise attached has been tryin’ to get their paws all over her since she showed up. Half the Kings are head over heels for that chick, and can you blame ‘em? She’s got curves that -” I thought having all those guys want her like that was a little excessive. That particular factor didn’t seem too rational. Plus, have you ever seen the show “Real World” on MTV? The cast goes to clubs all the time, and has cameras following them, but none of them even get that extent of attention.
I wanted to give off the impression that Téa was hard to find not because of how she looked/dressed, but because Kaiba and the others had a poor vantage point. The top of DV8 is where the rafters and lights are positioned, along with constantly moving equipment like strobe lights and rotating balls. It would be very easy to look RIGHT at someone and not realize who they are. Truthfully, only Yugi would stand out in a crowd whether he wanted to or not. Téa's goal was to merely stand out on the dance floor; if she got attention, she succeeded.
As I said before, what Odagiri said is not meant to be taken as 100% fact-- guys do tend to exaggerate, too! ^_~
Also, in my personal opinion, I thought that flashback Jounouchi had of Hirutani was a little unnecessary. It further proved that another guy - Jounouchi - liked her and the scene was reminiscent of the manga. *Please* don’t take any offense to what I’m saying; I hope I didn’t come across as offensive. I just wanted to express a view on that certain part because I didn’t exactly agree with it.
The point of that scene was not to drive home Joey's former crush, but his former gang days, and his newfound overprotectiveness as friends. Once he became friends with Téa and Yugi, his crush waned. Joey was the first to realize Yugi had a crush on Téa, and that was probably what drove him to move on (I haven't covered that topic in WDKY yet). I wanted to set the stage for Hirutani's return and Joey's last run-in with them, and that could only be done with a flashback. What better way to coerce someone into a gang than to threaten their friends-- most of all a girl? Joey might be crude, but he's pretty chivalrous, and refuses to let anyone harm a girl if he has anything to say about it (I would actually say most of the guys in Yu-Gi-Oh are like that-- especially Yugi, Tristan, Kaiba, and to a certain degree, Duke).
Otherwise, I was extremely content with this chapter, and eagerly wait for the next one to come out! I wonder what will happen between Anzu and Kaiba now she’s moving back home. However, there’s obviously going to be a problem with her actually not living *in* the Kaiba Mansion, and I hope that the next chapter more romance will be introduced between the two. ^_^
I do hope you've kept on reading past this point (in the fic), and I apologize for how long it's taken me to reply to your review!
Before I end this review, I started a new C2 community on entitled: Peaches and Dancing: A Mazaki Anzu Fanfiction Archive - and I was wondering if you would be so kind as to either contribute or become a staff member? I love all your Yuugiou work, and would be honored if you could submit or join. I understand you’re busy already with tons of other things - not to mention Dragonfayth - (I joined by the way! ^_^) - but if you have the time, it’d be great. I want quality PRO-Anzu authors on there and you definitely fit the description. If you are interested at all, please email me at: Princesskazumi@ Thank you!
I would love to join, but as you can see above, I'm short one domain name for your email! I'll check it out on FFnet nonetheless, but if you want to send me another staff invite, I'll be glad to join. I'd love to hunt down some well-written Anzu-fics!
troubledgrl101 -- this is all and all a very good alot...well at least in my opinion... umm...i dont get the part where the ghosts are involved but then again ...i take way too long then normal ppl do to process things.^_^...i hope u hurry wit the other chapters..i cant wait^_~
l8er
Hopefully Chapter 9/10 "Restless Spirits" and "Separation, and then..." isn't still confusing you. I made clear at the start of the fic that it took place after Battle City, but the Noah/Virtual World arc DID NOT take place-- hence Gozaburo and Noah returning to the mortal plane as ghosts. I wanted a way to weave them in, and I couldn't do that if they were both digitized in the virtual world.
Darkhope -- Wow.. O_o This is... GREAT! I usually dont like or read Tea/-anyone.. but this is anexception! I like all the other couples though, the Joey/Mai scene was really cute! ^_^ Hope you update soon, I'll be waiting
I always love it when one of my fics becomes the exception to the rule! I really don't think Téa/Anzu is that bad of a character, and if I get drive that point home by writing fics with her as a strong star, then I'll do it!
KaibaChick20 -- Oh my gosh! I have read all of these sroties and I'm in love with them. I've set in front of my computer for hours reading this. You are such a good writed. You should have these published into books!! Well thats what I would do.
Unfortunately, doing so would be illegal-- putting my fics into books, that is. Unless I took them to Japan and had them turned into a doujinshi or novelization, and even then... it would be iffy. I'd never be able to import it or sell it in the U.S., that's for sure-- copyright laws and all. But it's a nice thought! Thanks for the compliments!
Jujubie (Teto4eva) -- Fab! Totally fabbity fab fab! I love your so in depth chapters! It really brings the story to life and draws you into the conflicts and situations. Great job! Can't wait till the next update!
Thanks! I always appreciate it when people tell me just what they like about what I'm doing; it lets me know I should continue doing it! I do want to draw you into the story and put you into the characters' shoes... if I can. Thanks again for your reviews and support!
Gryphaena -- Ack! I haven't reviewed in a while (i couldn't think of anything intelligent to write)! May I ask why you have neglected Mokuba during this chapter? Will he be so hyper next chapter(that Tea will return) and that is why you cut him out of this one? Anything you write for this novel of a fanfiction will be eagerly read.
^^;; Alas! Mokuba couldn't really be squeezed into this chapter. But he does have his claim to fame in Chapter 12, and again in Chapter 15. I hope you've read them and enjoyed them!
AllisonWalker -- That was an awesome story, but it didn't seem finished. What happens to them! What happens with Joey and Mai? I want to know! And what about Bakura? Is he gonna reck Kaiba's hopes? I want to know! Bye. ^_^
It's not finished-- it's supposed to be 36 chapters long! I hope people aren't getting the wrong impressions with my non-cliffhanger chapters... >_> Don't worry, the Joey x Mai problem will EVENTUALLY be resolved (after it gets turned on its head a few more times), and Bakura will be making a reappearance...
Obsidian Swirl 71 -- This, I have to say, is my favorite fanfic. The only advice I would give plotwise is too much anticipation can get tiresome (you aren't there yet don't worry). But maybe it's time to explore the possibilities of the story with a relationship actually happening. Of course realistically, (if it were real lol) it would cetainly take time for Seto to form a relationsip with anyone. And you have excellent rythm with your plot, so I'm sure you will manage magnificently. lol You are one of the best I've read at blending your dialect into the other aspects of the story, it's flawless, not always easy to do I know. Also, good work on the original characters; they enhance the story, which is what they are supposed to do, and still manage to be intriguing in their own right. Long chapters are good; I want there to be a lot of this story! The only thing I would add is a little bit of poetic imagery (like describing Seto's coats), but nothing overboard. The people are definitely what makes the story interesting. In conclusion lol, update at once. I NEED to know what happens!
Too much anticipation, eh? Well, as much as I hate comparing WDKY to a soap opera, that's probably the best way for me to relate why I have these perpetually unanswered questions and unresolved situations. Don't worry, 99% of the loopholes will be closed by fic's end. As for the other 1%, well, that's what a sequel is for...
*cough* I do try to blend experience and realistic life into the magical world of Yu-Gi-Oh, all while keeping characterization intact. Thanks again for the compliments!
DragonsamaX -- *squeals* Holy frozen Jeebus on a stick! *flails*
... Sorry.. Onto the sane part of this review. Yay, another chapter! It took over an hour to read, and it was an hour well spent. ^_^ Hurry up and write more please! I need to go make a Bakura voodoo dolly. Anyone have any pins? >.>
*teeheehee* I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter, despite its length... Bakura is so fun to write, even if people end up disliking him for what he does. But ooh, he's such a fantastic villain!
Solar Kitty -- This was a really awesome chapter! It made me laugh and cry too! Personally, I really loved the Téa and Ryou/Bakura scenes! Also, this has to be my absolute favourite part in the whole chapter:
A single moment could have lasted an eternity, and Kaiba spun around to face him. Had he been wearing a trench coat instead of his school uniform, it probably would have swooshed in that gravity-defying arc, like all of Kaiba's coats.
I love it because it's so true! Kaiba has awesome coats! *cough* Serenity is such a cool character. It sucks that she is rather underplayed in the anime, but hopefully she'll get some more limelight in this fic, like she has! It was really funny reading about her smacking Seto! Wow, I could ramble on and on about everything in this chapter because it was so good! I was even telling my friend how good it was and that she should read it!
I hope we get to see more Téa/Ryou actions! I think it would be interesting to see Seto's reaction if they got invovled (thanks to Bakura, the uber cool tomb robber!). It might also serve as a way to spark Seto's true feelings for Téa since he is struggling to figure out if he truly loves her or not. All he needs is that extra shove! Anyways, I am looking forward to the next chapter as always!
I love it when I can get a truly emotional reaction from my readers! It's definitely one of my higher aims in writing this fic. I'm glad you told me what you liked about Chapter 10! It's especially surprising to find it's a particular part, not an overall "thing," like it being S/T, or the implications of other ships. ^_^ Yay for specific examples!
And as I mentioned to other reviewers, I don't like Serenity paired off with Seto, but I can see her being very influenced by Téa and Mai, and as a result, standing up to Kaiba, just as they have. (I do appreciate the recs, too. Every little review with concrit or extra info helps me!)
In later chapters, Bakura isn't as present, but he is indeed a catalyst in the relationship between Seto and Téa. Expect to see him again soon.
AG the master -- arg! why can't they just get together already! this time lapse thing is driving me crazy! I can't wait for tea and seto to finally heal their relationship for good and just be happy together
Alas "the course of true love never did run smooth."
Nachzes-Black Rider -- Nachzes: NO! Not MORE sadness! NO! [wails]
Lieh: [backs away]
Nachzes: [sobbing] Not--once in 120-pages--did--Seto apologise. I thought--that's what he--meant to--do! [wails again] [sobs]
Kaiba: [backing away too]
Nachzes: Don't get me wrng, I loved the chapter, but...it's so damn SAD that he doesn't just SAY it, damit!
Haiiro: It's Kaiba here we're talking about, give him time.
Nachzes: [wails]
Kaiba and Lieh: [sneak out]
I have to laugh at this... merely because you caught me red-handed. I didn't WANT Kaiba to apologize for that, and you're entirely right in pointing out "it's Kaiba. Give him time." Thanks for the laugh!
Celtic Rune (Hioga-chan) -- Yays for an update! Gang fights in a bar ... can't say I saw that coming, but it worked.
You may want to find a phrase other than "smash drunk." After a while, that kinda got a repetitive and annoying.
Eagerly awaiting a new one.
I do love surprising people! As for the advice re: "smash drunk," thanks for that-- I didn't realize I was using it so much, and in later edits of the chapter, I hope I've cut down on my overusage of the expression. Thanks again!
unknown reviewer -- I have been waiting months for this chapter and I must admit it was worth it. This is what I like about your long chapters, the huge amount of material makes the wait worthwhile. This chapter had everything, one of the best so far. Kaiba now somewhat knows about his actions after the ball, Bakura is trying to cash in on his favor, and Kaiba and Joey now even have a small bit of respect for each other. I can't stress enough how much I love your work. I don't care if it takes months for the next chapter...I know it will be well worth the wait.
It means a lot to have you say you're not going to give up on me, as I'm sure countless others have-- what with my sporadic updates and my sometimes too-long, sometimes too-short chapters. And as I've said time and again, I make it a point to blend in as many genres and experiences as possible, to make it an enjoyable fic for everyone, including myself!
I hope you continue to read and enjoy!
Immortalbreath37 -- I am so glad that you finally posted, but you took way too much time in making us all wait...but needless to say I have just finished reading this post and you are an excellent writer and I really hope that you don't make us wait so long next time. Bakura is the perfect antagonist to use now. Awesome job.
I do thank you for the compliments, but I'm afraid the age-old excuse of "real life" is going to have to suffice here. Sometimes I'm inspired to write WDKY, sometimes I'm not. More often, I'll have whole chunks of the chapter written, but one or two crucial scenes which are unwritten or don't seem right to me. Until I get them done, or until I get the whole fic beta'd, I won't post-- it's my policy, and I'm sticking to it. If you have me on your Alert list, you'll be aware of updates, but I can't promise anything other than that.
Mamono -- Hazzah! I was able to sneak in before this place closes up for repairs!
Heh, I can't say this enough - this chapter was awesome. I mean, the part with the video tapes? Oy... I just wanted Seto to find out everything, but then again, not...
^^ And Bakura is evil in my eyes now. Hehehehe...
Anyhoo - not to reiterate myself a bazillion times - great, superb chapter - and:
*whines* They were supposed to *talk* not whatever that agreement was! ;-; You love teasing us...
Does it count when I reply to a review from my beta? Well I'm going to anyway, just because I know you'll probably re-read this all and laugh. I wanted to have Seto find out the truth about Gozaburo/Téa in an interesting way-- but Téa wouldn't tell him, and he'd be less likely to believe everything she said if she TOLD him anyway (she already tried, after all). So what better way than... video tapes? Besides, it's like solid evidence to Seto, and here we have "inexplicable phenomena" right before his eyes!
I do love evil!Bakura, among others... you haven't seen the last of him, I guarantee you that. And I *smirk* now at your review over the "agreement," if only because Seto x Téa have come so far since then...
blue-lavender-ice -- Finally, you updated the story on my birthday, thanks, but I would have appreciated it sooner than that. None the less, I'm very glad that you updated.
So, she's moving back in again huh? Brilliant twists with Bakura in play, I must say that you are quite evil but in a rather interesting way. I love whre the story is headed. I would have loved a bit more S/T interaction but, hey, It's all good.
Why did you have to screw up the video tape from the night of the ball? I would have loved to have seen (imagined) Kaiba's expression, even though I knew you were bound to do something like what you did do. Must you always torture people? Anyway, that Chieko girl is starting to slightly bug me, just because she seems to know something that she's not telling the others. J/M... I was hoping that you would get them together soon. Anyway, another brilliant, but obscenely long, chapter. Can't wait for the next one which hopefully will not take as long as this one did.
I do have the entire fic planned out, and that includes the parts people are apt to blame me as "screwing up." For what solace it might give you, I intended Kaiba to have a screwed up video for the night of the Ball. At that stage in the story, I don't think he would have been ready to find out he'd kissed Téa and upset her so badly; he already has done enough of that WITHOUT remembering the after-Ball incident, and needed more of a shove to talk to Téa at all.
I do love to torture my readers... ^_^ And that includes with obscenely-long chapters. I won't apologize for that, though...
As for the Mai/Joey relationship, it'll get more fleshed out as we go along. Mai is old enough to make decisions on the fly, and Joey is spontaneous like that naturally, so I wasn't going to put them in the spotlight and have them "talk" anyway. As Mai would say "less talk, more action."
dragontamer101 -- For some reason I find Seto being called a nimrod by Joey ridiculously funny...
Anyway, this was a hell of a long chapter. I was torn between laughing and crying through the whole thing.
Seems that things are't really resolved yet between Tea and Seto but it's a start, besides, I guess if was then you wouldn't be able to throw Bakura into the mix.
I'll be looking out for the next update.
*grin* I don't think Kaiba and Joey are really the types to "reuse" insults, anyway. For some reason, I could hear Joey in my mind calling Kaiba a nimrod when I wrote that scene...
As with other reviewers, I'm glad I sparked an emotional reaction in you-- it's my very intention to do just that! Of course not everything is going to get resolved-- all things take time. I hope you've read up to the latest additions and are still enjoying the fic!
Cocoa1331 -- I hate MAI, but I love JOEY and he better be sleepig on the sofa.Why? Because he is a MINOR(?), and she is 24 going on 25 and I don't care if this is fake he's still young, I WAS fine with this chapter UNTILL it got to THAT part.Up-date soon please.
Frankly, I don't care who you love or hate and why. As silly as it is for me to say, this is my fic, and I believe in characterizing everyone as appropriately as I deem fit (and true to their personalities as set in the anime/manga) given their circumstances. I happen to like Mai a great deal, and I like her relationship with Joey (Polarshipping) just as much. If you're uncomfortable with that, then don't read the story: simple as that.
As for the fic-- you're right, it is "fake." Accept it as fiction and move on. By the way, it takes place in JAPAN, where they don't have the same laws as they do here. Short of going into a legal rant about what constites consent in a sexual relationship with a minor, I'm going to state flat out-- Joey and Mai slept together. (As in, HAD SEX.) The fic is rated R (M+) for a reason-- and again, if you can't take the heat, get out of the fireplace. This fic and its review board is no place for minors or people who can't handle real world situations and relationships, no matter what their form.
Svelte Rose -- Ack, before I start spewing how much I loved this chapter, I just needed to point out one thing that got me confused (which I'm sure someone else has already pointed out ^_^;;).
The day Téa chose to go back to school was a Monday, wasn't it? Because she'd talked about how she'd just putzed around Mai's apartment on Sunday and now that it was Monday, she found out that she didn't have a uniform. (Ie: "And now it was early Monday morning, and Téa was busy digging through her now-dry duffle bag, muttering incomprehensible things under her breath.")
Then in class: "Oh, Téa," Chieko frowned sadly, "I didn't get a chance to tell you! Yesterday while you were absent, Miss Ninomiya assigned us a project. We have to work in pairs."
Okay enough of that, now of my gushing and worshipping of this wonderful fic! First, I am so absolutely confused as to whom I want Téa to end up with. Ultimately, I know she'll probably end up with Kaiba or be on good terms with him at least but now, with Ryou in the picture - I can't help but cheer on "Ghostie" also! XD
But with all the little innuendos and foreshadowing, we, the readers, know that the same thing has probably happened in their past back in Atemu's time - Priest Seto and the Tomb Robber Bakura fighting over a girl who disappeared from their history but yet, had enough influence over thier lives for it to resurface again in the present.
And while we all cheered for the fact that Seto and Téa may have finally 'talked', I know that I was absolute refreshed with the fact that instead of a 'happy-ending' chapter where Téa goes back to living with him and everything, there are still set boundaries. Instead of choosing to live in the room that she used to, she's going to be living with the servants - in the same house but still out of reach for Seto.
A happy ending would've made us content with the chapter but with an ending like that and Bakura now raging mad knowing that Kaiba had gotten to her first, it just makes us want for more!
Which is exactly how it should be done.
Ah! Thanks for catching that error-- now I'm using a high-tech system of calendars and highlighted colors to make sure I don't flub like that. I revised that portion of the fic to reflect that Téa's absence was actually on a Monday, and she returned on a Tuesday. Japanese schools often have half-days on Saturday, but Téa missed that class too. I think the last day she was in school was Friday, and then she cut out before lunch.
Though the fic is unabashedly Seto x Téa, I do love to toss implications of others in there. It tends to piss some people off, as they don't think she's all that marketable-- but it's just implications, not actual relationships, that I'm teasing with here. Joey might have had a crush on Téa in the past, but he's in love with Mai now; Yugi might still be crushing on her, but he knows it'll never go anywhere with Kaiba in the picture; Bakura knows he has some sort of weird connection with Téa, and so he'll push out Ryou to the point of wearing his host down-- but it's not exactly a "love" so much as an "obsession."
So cheer everyone on!
You're also being quite devious and seeing through some of my plot points, but I won't say on what or how. ^_~ You're good, Svelte! Perhaps TOO good...
I'm also glad you agree with my ending-- it is meant to be a twist, but not a cliffhanger, and it was "meant to be" that way. Thanks! *tears up* It means a lot.
X_X I just finished re-organizing my emails with old reviews in them, so any other pertinent reviews I find will be added to their respective Review Reply page shortly. Some reviewers also replied to early chapters due to FFnet errors in the review system; I'll try and move those reviews to the right place. It might also take me a bit before I copy the contents of all of these to Darkness Rising; as a rule, my site needs an overhaul and probably won't get one until summer. Sorry!